I can't get "dates"!

[DJHoolahoop]

Hey guys,

I've been having problems getting together with the girls I've been getting numbers from. I don't spend much time approaching and would like to hear how the people who experienced this problem got past it or any wisdom that came out of it.

To clarify my problem a little further, its that I can get a number/e-mail a week, but that I've been unsuccessful so far in actually meeting up with a girl. I usually have a couple girls that I am interested in at one time, so that I'm not too wrapped up in one particular girl. I have been having a hard time getting to know the girl one-on-one (meeting up somewhere) as she usually comes up with some reason as to why she's busy that day.

Help?

 

[Wiesman44]

you're obviously not creating enough attraction. Work on how you PU these women rather than worrying about the amount of #'s you get.

 

[DJHoolahoop]

OK, then perhaps its in something I'm not doing or am not doing enough of that is the problem? In what way should I be handling the situation? As it is I generally try to talk about things that aren't boring (work, tv, school) and do light kino (placing hand on their forearm or shoulder). I throw in C&F and can get the girl laughing, but each time I bring up meeting somewhere (i.e. "Hey, I'm heading to ___ thursday night, come hang out") and she'll say "yeah, I might have something planned that night but I'll try to make it out." Which usually means she won't show up.

I'm just not sure what part of all this that I'm being weak in or not getting right.

 

[flexion_]

What do you do to set up a date once you get their number?

 

[DJHoolahoop]

Well in general I figure out where I have free time during the week or at least find times where I am going somewhere that could include a girl. Then I invite them to join me, whether my friends will be there or whether it happens to be just me. I try to make it as comfortable for them as possible without being complacent.

Being more specific would include "Hey ___, my friends and I are headed to (such and such place) and you're welcome to join us." or if I don't know her well yet I'll say "I'm going to the coffee shop this (thursday) to read for an hour, but I wouldn't hold it against you were you to show up."

 

[SynapsyS]

You're not being authoritive enough. Don't be all wishywashy about it.

"Hey, I'm going to the coffee shop, join me "

 

[ImtheOne]

you probably need to be forward that its just you and them on the date, no friends