I can't do it, but I can't give up. Any advice?

[Automatic]

I'm going to be 26 in two months, and I already have serious regrets about my life. I regret not doing many of things I want to do. I wasted my time hanging around lazy, AFC, ultra-negative friends and tried to convince them that we should be out DOING things instead of wasting our lives. I wasted time taking my dad's advice which has ended up turning me more into a ***** than anything else. He wasted my childhood sleeping and sitting out the couch, and NOW he wants to take me to Disneyland. Now, all he can do is sit back and criticize my life and ask my why I'm not with anyone. How he can strut around like he's the know-it-all of the universe and be such a stupid, fat, lazy, slob is beyond me.

I'm still too scared to be outgoing. I see people I want to talk to, yet I never do. I see them at work and while I'm out. I've gone to clubs only to keep to myself at the bar. There's hot girls EVERYWHERE, but I do nothing about it. The really, really sad thing is, I know I can't be that bad looking, because I always catch girls looking. I'm sure I have mastered the appearance of confidence and poise. In fact, I'm sure that in most ways I'm quite confident. I just have no idea how to talk to people and I'm irrationally scared ****less of them. I don't think it's that I'm not confident or insecure, but rather, it's a large amount of really bad past experiences that I have never been able to live down.

At this point, I don't think I'll ever get to where I want to be. I don't know what to do, because I always have idea that if I can still improve myself then I should be improving myself. I just don't think I can do it in enough time to save myself from future regrets. It's killing me on the inside.

Just fyi, I'm not a total looser. I did go to college and get a very respectable degree. I'm really good at my job, I love my job, I make great money, and I'm on the fast track to make a whole lot more money. I live on my own in a city that's about 500 mi away from my family and old friends. To me, this is a total chance to make myself into who I am, and now what others what me to be.

 

[theunflushables]

Man moving away from everything you know, whether its good or bad can be tough. But you just gotta get out there and meet new people to hang out, make new friends that aren't going to bring you down.

 

[Automatic]

Yes, but how? I have no idea how or where to do this. People seem to like to keep to themselves and not be bothered by anyone. Meeting new people is difficult and seems to me that most people would rather not bother with that.

 

[Kev07]

aren't there any cool people that you work with that you could hang out with?

or go play a sport somewhere, you can meet a lot of people doing that

as for hot girls, theres a wealth of information on this site on what you can do, go look it up

 

[guywhoneedshelp]

I'm going to be 26 in two months, and I already have serious regrets about my life. I regret not doing many of things I want to do. I wasted my time hanging around lazy, AFC, ultra-negative friends and tried to convince them that we should be out DOING things instead of wasting our lives. I wasted time taking my dad's advice which has ended up turning me more into a ***** than anything else. He wasted my childhood sleeping and sitting out the couch, and NOW he wants to take me to Disneyland. Now, all he can do is sit back and criticize my life and ask my why I'm not with anyone. How he can strut around like he's the know-it-all of the universe and be such a stupid, fat, lazy, slob is beyond me.

I'm still too scared to be outgoing. I see people I want to talk to, yet I never do. I see them at work and while I'm out. I've gone to clubs only to keep to myself at the bar. There's hot girls EVERYWHERE, but I do nothing about it. The really, really sad thing is, I know I can't be that bad looking, because I always catch girls looking. I'm sure I have mastered the appearance of confidence and poise. In fact, I'm sure that in most ways I'm quite confident. I just have no idea how to talk to people and I'm irrationally scared ****less of them. I don't think it's that I'm not confident or insecure, but rather, it's a large amount of really bad past experiences that I have never been able to live down.

At this point, I don't think I'll ever get to where I want to be. I don't know what to do, because I always have idea that if I can still improve myself then I should be improving myself. I just don't think I can do it in enough time to save myself from future regrets. It's killing me on the inside.

Just fyi, I'm not a total looser. I did go to college and get a very respectable degree. I'm really good at my job, I love my job, I make great money, and I'm on the fast track to make a whole lot more money. I live on my own in a city that's about 500 mi away from my family and old friends. To me, this is a total chance to make myself into who I am, and now what others what me to be.

Doesnt sound that bad. I am 20. I look at old pictures and videos from years ago and cry. I miss the "good ol days" and wish I appreciated them more. However, I may of gotten most of it out of my system, even though I still visit the batting cage or a DDR machine every now and then to sort of...reminiscence I guess you could say...

Try getting involved in things that you feel you may of missed out on. Last year, I bought a Kite and flew it at the beach. The reason why was because I was at the park, and saw a bunch of people flying kites. I immediately took out my cell phone and bought a kite off amazon. I maybe flew it 2 or 3 times but the point is I lived something I feel I may of missed out on while I was hanging out with my friends who by the way, most of them have ended up dead or in jail anyway.

Success is a lonely road. The people who are the closest to you are the people who hold you back from being successful. However, you still became successful, you should be proud!

Find joys in simple things, and who knows, maybe when you do, you'll meet someone, or at least meet less AFC of friends. I recently signed up to join a volleyball league. Hey, why not? In high school, I missed a lot of gym classes, so I gotta make up for all that lost volleyball time!

Hang in there bro.

 

[Automatic]

Doesnt sound that bad. I am 20. I look at old pictures and videos from years ago and cry. I miss the "good ol days" and wish I appreciated them more. However, I may of gotten most of it out of my system, even though I still visit the batting cage or a DDR machine every now and then to sort of...reminiscence I guess you could say...

Try getting involved in things that you feel you may of missed out on. Last year, I bought a Kite and flew it at the beach. The reason why was because I was at the park, and saw a bunch of people flying kites. I immediately took out my cell phone and bought a kite off amazon. I maybe flew it 2 or 3 times but the point is I lived something I feel I may of missed out on while I was hanging out with my friends who by the way, most of them have ended up dead or in jail anyway.

Success is a lonely road. The people who are the closest to you are the people who hold you back from being successful. However, you still became successful, you should be proud!

Find joys in simple things, and who knows, maybe when you do, you'll meet someone, or at least meet less AFC of friends. I recently signed up to join a volleyball league. Hey, why not? In high school, I missed a lot of gym classes, so I gotta make up for all that lost volleyball time!

Hang in there bro.

Wow. Thanks for the awesome reply.

 

[Remulak]

Yes, but how? I have no idea how or where to do this. People seem to like to keep to themselves and not be bothered by anyone. Meeting new people is difficult and seems to me that most people would rather not bother with that.

It may seem that way, you may be projecting that image on to others. I know it's hard, I have the same problem too sometimes be positive at all times nobody likes a complainer.

 

[Canadian Catnip]

If you do only one thing then this is it. Change your thinking from what you DON'T want to have happen to what you DO want to have happen.

Whenever we see a women we would like to talk to, several thoughts go through our mind. We can classify these thoughts into two categories.

The first category of thoughts are what we want to have happen. The second category of thoughts are what we don't want to have happen.

Next time you see a women and just as you are about to approach her, listen to what your mind is saying. More than likely it's thinking all about what you don't want to have happen.

Stop that. You should always be focused on what you want to have happen. You want to talk to her because you are friendly and like to meet people. You want to meet this women because she seems like and interesting person. Someone you would like to get to know better.

If you go into an approach with the negative mindset of trying to avoid looking needy or avoid being embarrassed then you already have a battle with yourself and thats not good. Believe me, you won't even see the IOI's if you are concentrating on not screwing up.

It can be hard to change at first but I believe it is important to realize what you are taking into the interaction with you.