"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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I can't believe it happened again.

SharinganUser

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Everytime I get my hopes up, I get totally ****ed over. I was really hoping to get some nice poon tang from a really nice woman this summer, but I have had such bad luck this year it's been a complete write off. Not just the summer, but the 8 months preceding it sucked pretty hardcore too.

I've tried really hard to change and nothing has helped my situation. I am not poor, stupid, ugly, fat, or boring. I am at my wits end, I can't figure out what I can do to fix my situation short of moving to another country.

Normally I just thank god I am not a starving child in africa, and then I feel better. But I just don;t like the idea of accepting the fact that there might not be anything I can do to change my situation. I don't like the idea of just being faithful that some ho will eventually want to blow me.

The only lay I have had in the last year actually stole 40$ from me. I just can't believe that that is the best I can do. I can't believe it and I refuse to accept it.

This blatant lack of ***** is affecting me in other area's of my life. I hate my job now, (not that I wouldn't hate it, but I have trouble concealing the fact in my situation), I am constantly in a terrible mood and I am falling back into depression. I was at the bar with a few buddies and decided to leave a bit early because if I didn't I would just hit the bottle hard.

I found myself today thinking that I am not one of the lucky ones that can marry for love. If I do get married it will be well after I am rich and it will probably be for looks and her for money or so I would assume. I am probably going to be one of those middle aged guys that shows up to his friends weddings and hits on the 20yr old bridesmaid(success is yet to be determined).

My buddy who knows the trouble I am going through, keeps trying to tell me that because it is the end of the season that some woman might want to have one last fling before summer is over in one week. I don't think that will happen.

All in all, I have not had an enjoyable summer. I haven't reached any of my goals this year and it is really getting me depressed.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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the_law

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are your friends having any success?
 

B4IFURU18?

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What are your goals, and why do you feel you haven't reached them?

You say ****ed over? What's that mean?

Give us some details.
 

SharinganUser

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are your friends having any success?

Not really but they are getting more ass than I am.

What are your goals, and why do you feel you haven't reached them?

My goals were to do 100 push ups in a row, build a raft and float down the yukon river, do a handstand, do a kip-up, get more hours in at the office and less hours doing a crappy sanitation job, find a nice summer fling.

The only goal I accomplished is to save some money so I can travel this fall. I am just barely saving enough.


By ****ed over, I mean I keep getting turned down. My friends are always telling me how cool they think I am and how much they like me. I just can't figure out why that doesn't carry over into getting laid once in awhile. (I don't mean getting laid by my friends).

I had asked out a really hot and awesome older woman, but she said I was to young for her. Another girl told me she is mad at boys right now and another one I asked out just for coffee 2x, kept saying 12 noon is to early because she is actually from another country.

It is affecting me to the point where I can't function at my crappy job. I nearly destroyed a comm-radio because I was getting blamed for something I didn't do.
 

the_law

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just relax and stop over-thinking it, you could be coming on too hard with girls, appearing too clingy and scaring them away. Is it just sex you want, or are you looking for a relationship?
also, do you feel like you need to validate yourself to your friends for any particular reason.....you could be just putting yourself under way too much pressure to score. women can smell desperation!
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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kdnash82

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Dude... you really need to calm down. It sounds to me like you're trying way too hard. You're putting a lot of pressure on yourself for no reason. Everyone has gone through their dry spells at one point or another. It happens.

If you're going out to meet women, STOP!!! You should never go out to meet women. The whole point of going out is to have fun. Stop thinking that you NEED a woman in your life in order to enjoy life.

Get yourself a hobby. Find something that you enjoy doing and do it. When I went through my dry spell, I ended up going to the gym. I went about 5-6 days a week for about 1 hour. My daily routine was going to work, coming, going to the gym from work, going home from the gym, cooking a nice dinner, taking a shower, getting my things ready for work the next day, then passing out from being absolutely worn out. I didn't have time to think about anything else.

Before you know it, women will come to you without you even realizing it. Conversation will come a lot more naturally because you're not expecting it, and not forcing it.
 

SharinganUser

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I have been doing some thinking lately and I have realized that I need to be exercising more. I have to focus more on my goals and stop worrying so much about getting laid. I have to get my life in order.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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SharinganUser said:
I have been doing some thinking lately and I have realized that I need to be exercising more. I have to focus more on my goals and stop worrying so much about getting laid. I have to get my life in order.
Bingo. :up: Stop defining your happiness by the involvement of another person (or lack of). Besides, people tend to gravitate to people who are genuinely happy.
 

Slick101

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What you need to do... is write out a schedule or talk about this shizzle with your Pyschotrist....

theyll make you more energetic... and thats what you need to be....
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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SharinganUser

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I am going to train in my martial art to the point where I am to tired to even think about getting laid.
 

MagnuM

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SharinganUser said:
I am going to train in my martial art to the point where I am to tired to even think about getting laid.
Now that's the spirit Tiny Grasshopper!
 

SharinganUser

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UPDATE: I just got back from a hike with a totally awesome woman. It was awesome, we talked about everything and I managed to just relax and refrain from saying anything cheesy, or to really make a "move."

She nearly fell on me, but grabed me to stop the fall. When she got her balance back, I jokingly accused her of "coping a feel." She thought that was funny. We also had a wooden sword fight with our walking sticks. There was bunch of other stuff that I won't waste your time with, it was just an awesome day.

It was totally relaxing and I never pressured my self to say or do anything to impress her. It was just a fun and relaxing day, everything was natural.

The only red flag was that when I met her at the coffee shop I heard her talking to her friend about a guy that she was seeing for fun. This bothered me for about 20 minutes and finally thought "Ah, What the hell... Suck it up buttercup, just enjoy the day and have fun." After that it was smooth sailing.

I don't know if it will lead anywhere. But what I do know was that I had fun today and I am meeting her and some friends at the pub tonight. BTW she is in town until sunday.
 

SharinganUser

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UPDATE: Made a new friend, spent some time with her sitting at the riverside at night just enjoying the view and talking about life. She left the next morning. I got her email and am keeping in touch with her. I wasn't trying to hook up with her, or get into a relationship. I just enjoyed spending time with her and build a strong connection.

There was no pressure and it was a totally relaxed weekend with her. I loved it alot and meeting her helped me to understand what it really means to relax arround women that you are attracted to.

This summer has taught me that you can force things to go the way you want. I went into this with no expectations and I gained a lot more than if I tried to "make a move," or whatever.

I am now thinking more in long-term. Yeah, she is not available now, nor are most of the women I meet. But if I just keep building more connections and making those connections stronger, I will have the success I want. Yeah, it may not get me laid next weekend, but I think things will work out in the future.

The one mistake I have been making since I begun my journey to improve my chances with women has probably been the one thing holding me back all this time. I have been puting way to much pressure on myself and not enjoying my time with people to the fullest extent.
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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You started the race but didn't get to the finish line!! Always pursue a woman romantically only, if she tickles your fancy!!
 

SharinganUser

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My goal was to enjoy my time with an amazing woman without the pressure of trying to lay her or get her on a date. That was my only goal, that and to make her laugh and smile. I did those things, so in that sense I did cross the finish line. I accomplished exactly what I set out to do.

I have decades ahead of me to get laid and meet women, I don't need to force myself into doing something that will happen naturally. I am man and they are women, it will happen. That, my friend, is the natural order of things.
 
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SharinganUser said:
. I am man and they are women, it will happen. That, my friend, is the natural order of things.
So it is! :)
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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