"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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I can see any ounce of DJ leaving me

schaff

Don Juan
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Basic run down. Was doing great was an AFC for a long time came here and recovered big time. Was getting loads of interest from Girls and finally found someone that I thought was perfect for me. Recently I have had a lot of set backs over the last 2 months (got made redunant 5 weeks ago, my band has split up, had to move back in with parents, have had to sell my car due to lack of funds). This has serously effected my self worth and am incredibly depressed. This may not sound like the end of the world but for someone who never grew up with much and had got their life almost perfect has been a huge low for me.

My gf has been great in certain ways through this and has been a great comfort and reassures me everyone has a string of bad luck at least once. Only trouble is due to this lack of self worth and the fact in my troubled head I can only see my gf as the only decent thing going right at the moment. As you can see this string of events is throwing me straight into the land of AFC. I'm drinking more, getting possessive as I feel everything else is falling around me and am almost forcing her to do the same. She has always gotten a lot of attension for other men and this is the only time its ever effected me I always knew I was better and had nothing to worry about.

I really don't feel now I can be in a relationship as I have nothing to offer. I'm sure something along these lines happens to everyone but how can you make a relationship survive during these set backs in your life?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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schaff

Don Juan
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Oh yeah, forgot to say this been in the LTR for 16 Months and I guess part of the problem stems from jelously that she has just got promoted and everything is going right for her at the moment.
 

Ser_i

Don Juan
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by picking up your own life, you need to focus on your own life big time to get it back on track... and if you do that properly you won't even have the time to think about stuff that could go wrong, cause the more you think about it the more it will go wrong!

You are allways responsible for your mental state,

you once thought you're a winner? then you can be and will REMAIN a WINNER!
 

Sardaukar

Don Juan
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Try optimism. It helps.

Barring that, self control is in order. Everytime you feel a pessimistic thought reaching into your head, STOP IT RIGHT THERE. KICK IT OUT.

This is much easier if you are occupied, so if you aren't occupied, be. It'll help you get through the day.

It helps to think that you are worthwhile just because you are. You have a penis and women do not feel complete without it. Yours specifically.

Thinking like that makes more sense that thinking you are sexy because of your car, clothes, job, and money. Attract women based on who you are, not what you have.
 

pressure0354

Don Juan
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people often make the mistake of thinking happiness is outside themselves. start making goals, and little by little, work towards accomplishing them.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Royal Elite

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Focus on getting back your life. If you did it once you can do it again. Women are even better when the chips are down, so long as they see you making an effort. If you sit around in self pity she will lose interest, if you start reaching for the stars again, she will let you stand on her back to help you reach them.
 
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