"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

I broke up with my 1 year g/f and need help assessing the situation and getting over

resilient

Master Don Juan
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personal file explained

Bourne said:
What kind of stuff do you write in it? Just few examples.
Example:
Well my first entry was about long distance relationships. I wrote out my thoughts, frustrations, and expectations that I experienced with my last ex trying to see if it would work. I write about events and then my interpretations of how those events occured. This helps me in predicting future actions. As they say experience is the greatest teacher, so remember what you experience to improve your intuition and raw gut instinct.

Insight
You'll look back at it years later and be amazed by what you went through, what you thought, and may still believe. I can't always vent on friends or family, so I try to come to a logical conclusion in my personal file. You can also use NLP to start building your goals and future plans.

Highlight
If you're using Word, use the highlight and bold feature on the sentence you thought was the greatest in the piece you wrote, so it sticks to you. Like a golden nugget of knowledge: wisdom.

Visual/Diagram
If you you're a visual person like me, then try making a diagram of your thoughts or a formula for a process in MS Paint, Photoshop and import the file into Word. I thought of this idea while watching David D's "Deep Inner Game" Example: Game = Confidence + Social Skills/Calibration.

Field Reports
Writing field reports here to discuss your body language, congruence/delivery, and sticking points really come into play here as well for positive change.

And remember, it's a deep conversation with yourself and no one can judge you so let all your thoughts out happy, mad, sad, who cares. It's all you. If you go over the deep end exhausting a subject to death then you can still write the most short and helpful work. IE. Last Minute Resistance tactics, Phone Game, Openers, Negs, C+F. Then afterwards toss out what you don't really want to internalize.

Anyway, you'll probably get more out of reading your own experiences than others, because you actually experienced those approaches.

Have fun!
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Bourne

Senior Don Juan
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resilient said:
Example:
Well my first entry was about long distance relationships. I wrote out my thoughts, frustrations, and expectations that I experienced with my last ex trying to see if it would work. I write about events and then my interpretations of how those events occured. This helps me in predicting future actions. As they say experience is the greatest teacher, so remember what you experience to improve your intuition and raw gut instinct.

Insight
You'll look back at it years later and be amazed by what you went through, what you thought, and may still believe. I can't always vent on friends or family, so I try to come to a logical conclusion in my personal file. You can also use NLP to start building your goals and future plans.

Highlight
If you're using Word, use the highlight and bold feature on the sentence you thought was the greatest in the piece you wrote, so it sticks to you. Like a golden nugget of knowledge: wisdom.

Visual/Diagram
If you you're a visual person like me, then try making a diagram of your thoughts or a formula for a process in MS Paint, Photoshop and import the file into Word. I thought of this idea while watching David D's "Deep Inner Game" Example: Game = Confidence + Social Skills/Calibration.

Field Reports
Writing field reports here to discuss your body language, congruence/delivery, and sticking points really come into play here as well for positive change.

And remember, it's a deep conversation with yourself and no one can judge you so let all your thoughts out happy, mad, sad, who cares. It's all you. If you go over the deep end exhausting a subject to death then you can still write the most short and helpful work. IE. Last Minute Resistance tactics, Phone Game, Openers, Negs, C+F. Then afterwards toss out what you don't really want to internalize.

Anyway, you'll probably get more out of reading your own experiences than others, because you actually experienced those approaches.

Have fun!
Thanks man. That definetly helps.
 
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