I Became Terrible at Sex

[Upside]

I don't know which section this thread should belong to, but since it mostly pertains to my **** I figured I would put it here. This is pretty embarrassing for me but I've dealt with this for a while and literally tried everything to prevent this post from happening, but I'm at a loss. I am 20 by the way.

I have had quite a few chicks. I used to be able to fvck six times a night for 30+ min each and still have the energy for more. I would be hard as steel and girls would tire out before I did. Lasting too long used to be my problem, now I can't fvcking last at all. I get whiskey **** too frequently and I don't even drink every weekend I go out.

I have been with my current girl for quite a while now. Getting hard is not a problem. Staying hard is. When we fvck I can only go on for like 7 minutes tops with the fear that my **** will get soft. What will happen is that I *** in like 2 minutes or I tire out at 10 and both circumstances are less than ideal. I still want to **** her. I have pictures of her boobs on my phone that I occasionally look at when in class or whatever. And through all of this she has been mostly understanding, but I can't help but feel that she is just saying it to be nice. She has been initiating it more than I have lately and I am always hesitant. I lost my desire to actually have sex, but I constantly think about it. I feel bad only because there is no way she will hang around if this happens for that much longer. It REALLY has put a strain on our relationship. I get moody over this and I rarely get moody. I try to be fun and light, but when I can't even fvck a girl properly i get pissed the fvck off. She is still hot as ever. She has the combo of boobs and ass that her friends would pay to have and I am wasting it.

Is it a physical problem? I can get hard. The time from my virginity to now is not a long time span so I can not attribute my problem to "age", I mean I am 20 ffs. I work out, I eat somewhat healthy now but if my friends go out to eat crap I usually join them. I play 4 different sports throughout the week with groups of people ranging from volleyball to racquetball and just plain old running. I don't jerk it a lot and I never really do (like once every several months) when I am with someone, but when I do it is not a problem. Just when fvcking as of right now, staying hard is my biggest problem.

Mental? Constantly worrying about it is not helping me. It's a never ending cycle. The more I worry the problem will worsen. You can tell me to "not think about it"...but it is not like I can just turn the part of my brain off. I WANT to forget about it, but I just can't. I can't even enjoy having sex right now worrying about this. I don't want to fvck anymore. It just isn't fun.

There are much bigger problems in my life than this right now, but right now this is the most frustrating. It happened again last night and this morning when we woke up it was just awkward. She rarely said anything to me and just made me feel like $hit. I would make light of this situation, but it has happened too frequently for me to even laugh about it now. What is something that I can seriously do to tackle this problem. And no, Viagra is not an option.

 

[Colossus]

It could be several things:

Psychogenic (mental)---especially if you still get morning erections.

Testosterone---very unlikely at your age but low testosterone can present this way. Might be worth getting checked.

Vascular---are you a diabetic? Sickle cell? Any history of vascular problems? Again, unlikely, but it can be a culprit.

Id be willing to bet your problem is mental, and the more you stress about it the worse it gets. Also, why not Viagra? Too proud? The drug is well-tolerated and can be used as needed. It's not just for old men.

 

[Alle_Gory]

How are your energy levels? Does the exercise leave you exhausted or pumped and ready for more?

How are you sleeping? And how much sleep do you get?

Diet? Do you use multivitamins? Or herbs or supplements?

 

[CaptainJ]

Chill brother, every man goes through this experience of performance anxiety. I think you've diagnosed yourself pretty accurately, you're hampered by anxiety and a desire to stay hard, which can often be counter productive and make you go floppy. There's not much you can do about it unless you stop worrying about this thing and realise that it will eventually go away. I have a few tips to speed the process.

Don't masturbate, and wait about a week to have sex with the girl. As you build up your horniness, you'll find that your erections are harder, longer lasting and easier to get and maintain.

Get her on the pill if she isn't already. The act of putting on a condom can often cause your **** to get soft in the process and fvck things up.

For problems of cvmming too soon, just start off slow. When you feel the need to cvm, wait, hold off and go slow again. Soon enough you'll be able to go faster and longer, but you need to start slow.

Just remember its all in your head and there's nothing wrong with you, almost all men go through the same thing.

 

[Upside]

Still get morning wood from time to time. I never did get it everyday like some dudes supposedly do.

I get physicals done every year. Blood work, urine, etc. If I had low testosterone levels I think my doctor would of found it by now. Most recent was in December.

Not a diabetic and I don't have any vascular diseases.

I have a thing against medication in general. With all the side effects I find taking medication isn't worth it in MOST circumstances. Viagra would only increase the quality of my sex life, not my actual quality of living/function.

If this is mental it had to start somehow and why? What would have I had to possibly worry about? My life can get frustrating, but by no means is my life a constant struggle for existence.

 

[mrRuckus]

Zinc supplements. If the testosterone is flowing you should be very hard when you wake up.

I think sex is too much work. All that sweating and pumping your hips and sh1t that I can't even concentrate on feeling good. I actually prefer handjobs and bjs and the girl on top because i don't have to do anything. Ok, girl on top is a bit of work too when she's begging you to suck her t1ts and pull her hair and sh1t.

This one girl i'm seeing is pretty funny. She decided she was going to put a pillow on my face as "sensory deprivation" while she did things to me. That's a hell of a lot better than sex being the job that it is.

 

[Upside]

@Alle_Gory

Depends on the work out. If I play sports I am generally pumped for more and don't want to stop. If I lift or go for runs I am generally pretty tired afterwards.

I range anywhere from 5-8 hours a sleep a night. Weekends I generally sleep very well as I rarely have commitments on saturday/sunday mornings. I definitely should be sleeping better on the weekdays through. My diet is a mix of grains, meats, fruits, and vegetables. I will admit to snacking to unhealthy stuff on a regular basis, but I have been trying to really cut back the past year or so. I do take a multivitamin.

@CaptainJ

Hard for me just to "not think about it" though. I don't know what I can really do to relax. Maybe I just need a real nice massage or something. I don't know. She is already on the pill so that's a plus.

@mrRuckus

May look into the zinc. But the best fvck I ever had was by far better than the best BJ I ever had.

 

[Bible_Belt]

And no, Viagra is not an option.

Why not? It is $20 a pill. But they don't tell you that 1/4 of 1 pill is enough of a dose to work for someone young and healthy. And I think even at that rate, you probably wouldn't get past about the third pill before you got over the mental block and anxiety that is your problem now.

And however embarrassing it is to tell your problem to a doctor is still less embarrassing than what you are experiencing with your girlfriend.

 

[Colossus]

You didnt hear this from me, but visit researchstop.com. Their Taladosolut is the same as Cialis---I can testify. No script, a bit costly, but less than an actual script. Insurance companies reimburse poorly for erection drugs in the US.

It'll help you push through your mental blockades by making erections easier and harder. I use it after a cycle of anabolics which I use for weightlifting. The refractory period for me can be a bit long after a cycle, leaving my test levels a bit low and erections less than optimal. Cialis is great.