I attract Toxic women.

[Skyline]

As the title says, I think I attract toxic women. Here's why:

I would say 99% of my successful interactions with women have been with ones that are basically toxic. They have a history of abuse, drugs, absence of a parent(s), low income background, and even criminal history. Now this is a "step up" compared to my old self(before I joined this forum) because I would attract the OTHER set of toxic women, which consists of: suicidal, low self-esteem, middle-upper class background, and generally just depressed and negative.

The issue with the first set of women I explained, the ones that I attract now, is that they're ticking time bombs. I heard about one of my ex's who is now on meth and another one whom has a kid now- she's about 17 years old. And even a few days ago a girl whom is my type became my Boss at my work and started texting me. This woman is about 24 and has, I think, two kids. And it was the same situation two Bosses ago. She was in her mid twenties, single mom, banging body, and wanted me.

But the bitter sweet thing about this is that I actually connect with these types of women. They're easy to talk to, they know how to flirt, they're generally attractive 6-8's, they know how to get sexual, and they just feel like they connect with me 100%. We even share the same music tastes! I feel as If I were to one night stand with these types of women I would get attached almost immediately and that's what I'm afraid of.

Any idea why I'm a toxic magnet? I really don't want to end up doing something stupid and having it hold me back later down the road.

 

[parkthebus]

When it comes to people, are you a give or a taker?

 

[Skyline]

When it comes to people, are you a give or a taker?

If it's something I want/need, then I'm a taker. But overall, I would say I'm a giver.

 

[parkthebus]

If it's something I want/need, then I'm a taker. But overall, I would say I'm a giver.

Maybe it's because these sort of women give to you because you're a decent guy and they've got issues and you simply reciprocate. Givers like givers and takers like takers. If shes hot young and got her **** together shell have a lot of attention and is more likely to be a taker.

 

[Skyline]

Maybe it's because these sort of women give to you because you're a decent guy and they've got issues and you simply reciprocate. Givers like givers and takers like takers. If shes hot young and got her **** together shell have a lot of attention and is more likely to be a taker.

Now that I think about it, I would say that they are givers. The suicidal/low self esteem girls that I used to attract were definitely takers. The type of girls that I attract now are the ones that post pictures on social media about how they'll take care of their man, cook for him, massage after work, etc...

That's another thing, these girls are attractive and can get d*ck pretty easy. I would say that they have a lot of orbiters whom they don't really pay attention to. That isn't to say that they don't sleep around though. It's like they're looking for that one type of guy.

That last paragraph actually sounds like me... Sleeping around until that one type comes along, but I know that type is toxic...

 

[parkthebus]

Perhaps it's that youre actually flirting with these women subconsciously because you're happy to go for the easy pickings and aren't putting enough effort and work into a more valuable prospect. There's nothing wrong with easy pickings mind you, if it gets your rocket going and makes you happy then its fulfilled its purpose.

 

[Atom Smasher]

Like PPRF says, we all do. It's a matter of what YOU select, or what you think you deserve deep down.

 

[SamTheHobit]

Everyone attracts toxic women you just probably aren't throwing them back fast enough

This is gold.

 

[Young OG]

I can relate to this. My 2 longest LTRs were with women that were into drugs. I was doing drugs with them. One of them is on methadone now and the other one is currently in rehab for a year (for the second time). I've also dated plenty of attention hoes and straight up sluts. I've learned from my mistakes and finding this site has helped a lot. I am drug free now and now know of red flags to watch for. You just have to watch for those red flags and stay away from any women that show them.

 

[GS750]

After BPD girl and I split I did a lot of thinking like this. But it turns out that I just wasn't being selective enough. Dealing with a few toxic women in your life may actually help you to see what types to avoid. Don't be so hard on yourself.

 

[PeasantPlayer]

I attract lots of women, but they always seem to like one of my friends better when I introduce them, and I am better looking, this has been the monkey on my back since I was young and causes some insecurities

 

[parkthebus]

I attract lots of women, but they always seem to like one of my friends better when I introduce them, and I am better looking, this has been the monkey on my back since I was young and causes some insecurities

I have two tips. 1, you need to divert the attention of others from your friends to you. Humans compete for attention, even men. Be more extroverted. I find this easier post excersize when I'm in a good mood. 2, you may have a dynamic with your friends where you give them more attention than they give you which makes women assume the are the alpha.

 

[PeasantPlayer]

have two tips. 1, you need to divert the attention of others from your friends to you. Humans compete for attention, even men. Be more extroverted. I find this easier post excersize when I'm in a good mood. 2, you may have a dynamic with your friends where you give them more attention than they give you which makes women assume the are the alpha.

I wouldn't say I am introverted, or extroverted, somewhere in between depending on how I feel that day or week can have a lot to do with it. Thanks for the advice, I need to see where I am going wrong with my game and aura to correct this. I'm not one to compete cause with women I am usually Jay Cutleresque aloof and don't care. I just always wondered why this happened to me. Sorry to derail the OP thread, i'll make another thread

 

[Serenity]

I only know why I was a toxic magnet, because I had a similar background. Do you have a similar background?

 

[Tenacity]

Dude, every chick I attract is fvcked up.

1.) Either she has growing weight issues and refuses to fix them

2.) Or her finances is totally fvcked up

3.) Or she has more than two kids already

4.) Or she's lukewarm, one day she loves me, next day she's so so, next day she loves me, next day so so

5.) Or she's a gold-digger of some sorts

OR a combination of all five of these. It's been my problem since I started getting laid/dates consistently around 2010. I have YET to find one plate that I could actually do a serious long term QUALITY relationship with. All I have are plates I can do short term flings with because you can't truly take any of these chicks serious with these major flaws.

I believe it's the MARKET that's the problem, some people believe I'm CAUSING this somehow and need to "work on something within or outside of myself". I don't know what the fvck else I would need to work on.....

 

[zekko]

Givers like givers and takers like takers.

I don't know if that is necessarily true. I am pretty much a taker, I've even been told I'm a taker, but some girls who are givers like this because they like to give and this gives them someone to give to.

I tend to attract nice girls. Not sure why, as I've inferred above I'm kind of a selfish guy, but I'm pretty honest and respectful to most. Maybe I have just enough of an edge without falling over into the full douchebag category. Or maybe it's that I only like nice girls, and they are the only ones whose attention I acknowledge.

When I say "nice", of course I mean "relatively nice". No woman is fully nice. That should be obvious, but I should clarify. I find the slutty b!tch type repellant.

 

[Skyline]

I only know why I was a toxic magnet, because I had a similar background. Do you have a similar background?

Well lower income background is what I have in common and plus my dad died when I was really young. Those two traits are the most similar background that we usually share, not necessarily their dad dying but issues involving her dad not being there.

Everything else is kind of the opposite, I don't do drugs or get into trouble with the law or cause any trouble.

 

[usernamedox11]

most girls are ****ed up nowadays, just the way it is.

i personally like hanging out with BPD girls...they are fun and can't really get to me anymore. i will harass and talk **** right back and zero ****s given what they think

 

[Desdinova]

I think I attract toxic women.

I've thought about this whole idea of "attracting a certain type of women" and I think it's just a catch-phrase to cover up how generally terrible the selection of today's women are. Women are always saying "I attract the wrong men" but it's because the "wrong" men have the right personality traits that attract them. The same goes for attractive women. They've been so fvcking spoiled and catered to that they've become "toxic". Guess what? Date an ugly or fat chick and she's likely "toxic" to some degree as well.

Saying you attract "the wrong type" of women throws a blanket over the issue that there are a LOT of terrible women out there. The good news is the more you date, the more likely you'll come across a halfway decent one.

 

[SeymourCake]

Maybe you remind them of their decent father who they rebelled against in their teenage years and would like to do the same with you.