I am so disappointed in myself...

[maosrdbf]

This is long but please read...

Every since I began reading the site's articles and the DJ bible and such (about 2-3 weeks ago), I had a whole new outlook on women and myself in relation to them. I read all these techniques and tips and as I was reading them and even for a little while after, I had confidence boosts.

I began going to the gym shortly after I began reading the material on this site because I wanted a better body and I figured it would be a good place to practice some DJ techniques if I can find any HBs.

So last week I spotted a HB who was there on Wednesday and Friday. She and I made eye contact on many occasions but it was more like a game to see who would look away first. She won twice on Wednesday but I won the last battle . Friday, pretty much the same thing. I wanted to approach her on Friday and get her number, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. Everytime I came near her or walked past her (by chance) I just pretended as if I didn't notice her and looked somewhere else. I obviously should have looked right at her as I did this for eye contact again, then smile at the very least or something. See, I know what I was supposed to do, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it.

Anyway, I didn't see her again until this evening. LOTS of eye contact and after Friday, I was SURE that I was going to approach her next time. I don't know though. She's not the best HB out there, maybe a 7-7.5 and frankly, I don't care if I end up with her or not, but for some reason I just am unable to push myself up to her. On sunday I developed three massive pimples under my lower lip also, so I guess I'm not looking my best as the bible clearly stated I should. I suppose I'm not a very attractive person anyway, regardless of the pimples. That and other factors I guess are why I didn't. I also lack social skills. I used to have them, but they just died out on me, so I don't know how well I'd do in a conversation. Of course I'm overanalyzing everything like the classic AFC and I know of those 3 second and 3 minute rules, but like I said, I can't seem to just push myself to do it.

This is very disappointing. I'm sure as you're reading this you see that I am able to point out every mistake and I know the appropriate solution (from reading so much), so now you're wondering what the hell is wrong with me. All I can say is that when it comes down to the very last moment of making that move, I step the other way, naturally, and am unable to step in the right direction.

I should also add, I guess, that since it's a gym, I'm in the middle of my workout often and she is also so I don't want to interrupt my concetration, or hers, for that matter. There were still occasions, regardless, where I could have approached her, I guess, so this whole statement is irrelevant, blah!

Thanks for reading this. Anybody have any reasoning as to why I am like this? I know how to be a DJ but I guess as they say, it's easier said than done.

 

[maosrdbf]

Originally posted by BerzerkFury
You don't sound very confident typing it degrading yourself and what not....don't do that at least, it helps.

Woops, didn't mean to. I don't really lack self esteem or confidence. I'm alot more confident in some areas than others, as we all are. I was trying to state more facts than expressing my opinions of myself. For example, it is a fact that I lack decent social skills now, but it is also a fact that I used to have em.

I guess I do need to further improve confidence though. Maybe I'm just not ready to approach women yet?

 

[Mikelo2k]

I know how you feel As someone once said:
Hesitation leads to masturbation!

Now, next time you are near her, and you are at that point that you decide which way to step, just DONT-THINK... simply DO! Just let the words "HI" slip out, thats all u gotta do. The conversation will carry from there. Just walk up, smile, make eye contact, and say HI!

I know it sounds easy, but easier said than done... just try your best to "let go of all worries" right when you are 'deciding' wether you should or shouldnt go.

Reasoning why u feel this way? Well i suppose everyone feels this way at some point. I used to feel this kinda feeling sometimes too (i prolly still do )

Hope that helped a little

Peace,
Mikelo2k

 

[maosrdbf]

Originally posted by Mikelo2k
I know how you feel As someone once said:
Hesitation leads to masturbation!

Now, next time you are near her, and you are at that point that you decide which way to step, just DONT-THINK... simply DO! Just let the words "HI" slip out, thats all u gotta do. The conversation will carry from there. Just walk up, smile, make eye contact, and say HI!

I know it sounds easy, but easier said than done... just try your best to "let go of all worries" right when you are 'deciding' wether you should or shouldnt go.

Reasoning why u feel this way? Well i suppose everyone feels this way at some point. I used to feel this kinda feeling sometimes too (i prolly still do )

Hope that helped a little

Peace,
Mikelo2k

Yeah, you're right and I guess I would have too if I had gotten the chance to get near her or something, which I didn't last night.

Maybe I just have to wait for a chance to walk by her or something.

 

[CableLight]

There's going to be very few times you're going to be on your "A Game" in every situation you want to be. There's probably always going to be some little detail or occurance that's possibly going to be blown up into something its not, and as a result you'll hesitate to act. Realize that everyone's got their own flaws and its not logically possible to be infallible.

What I'm trying to get at with all that is, dude, dont kill yourself from the inside out. A couple things dont go through - big deal, it happends. The ideal goal is to live without regrets and to seize every opportunity, but idealism isn't always reality. My advice to you is to not beat yourself up because of something like this, there's more important things to be concerned about. Instead, do like it sounded like you were alluding to and make the approach next time. You know how unsatisfied you feel right now with yourself? Remember this feeling, because you're probably not going to want to experience it again, and the way to avoid that is making every possible attempt at seizing the opportunities you're given.