"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
I am interested in this girl but has a bf.
- Thread starter crossboss
- Start date
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
zerocelcius
Master Don Juan
:trouble:
Keep it simple and have fun.
:yes:
2nd_Chance
Don Juan
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Ace of Flames
Master Don Juan
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Just display your value, and if yours is higher than his, she may just come after you. If she tries to cheat with you, tell her you'll only take her if she splits with him first.
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Maxtro
Master Don Juan
jazzmaster2
Don Juan
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Have you thought about how you would always question whether or not if your girl is more interested in another guy than you when you date later on?
Plus, her boyfriend probably has a huge gun somewhere waiting to shoot your brains off.
I think I'm just going to lay it all out there, and let her decide to eother leave her bf, and come with me or what. Worst case is she tells me to get lost (well, she'ss probably LJBF's me), and I will at least finally be free of her.
However, I would like this to work, so i'll probably say something about regrets ( I regret not asking her out when she was single), say we should start over, and see where we can go from there. And i will never say i love/like her, just say i think we have great potential, and we would be great together - or something like that.
Please give me some advice, that will maximise my chances, like what to say (ultimatums?), what not to say, etc.
2nd_Chance
Don Juan
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jazzmaster2 said:
You are 100% right man. I wish I had never messed with a chick with a boyfriend, because that led to part of the downfall of my current relationship. Sure, you think its all gonna work out at first... but if it doesn't... man, your screwed.
Maxtro
Master Don Juan
I'm guessing you need to try and advance with her to the point where she will actually say, "Sorry I'm in a relationship."
I really wish somebody with experience on this issue will post about it.
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Someone Much cooler
Senior Don Juan
Maxtro
Master Don Juan
Yeah those guys deserved. Trying to make a move on a girl, especially touching her when her man is present is asking for a beating.
But when he is not around, all bets are off, as long as the guy trying to make the moves stays respectful to her.
This doesn't change the fact that if there isn't a ring on her finger she is still up for grabs. (not in a literal way mind you)
Someone Much cooler
Senior Don Juan
Maxtro
Master Don Juan
That is an interesting point. And my answer is yes. From all of the stuff I've read and my little life experiences with women, I've realized that loyalty means very little to them.Someone Much cooler said:
And yes I have had a girl leave me for a different guy and yes it did hurt back then. But now I realize that I deserved it. If a girl is leaving you for a better guy it means that You are doing something wrong It is just the way humans are. We are always looking for an upgrade.
I'm still looking for somebody to post how to get a girl who is in an off and on relationship.
More feminine girls tend to be all over the place like that. Their emotions change rapidly like clouds change form... they live for the moment. Girls with a bit more masculinity tend to say what they mean and are far more predictable, although you will probably not feel the same degree of passion with a girl like this.Maxtro said:
Great point.Maxtro said:
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
zerocelcius
Master Don Juan
There are girls that will leave you for what they think is better, but don't let that for a sec. make you feel like you did something wrong!Maxtro said:
That is a very aggressive self degradation. To measure your self worth on the actions of a non respectable female. Deny any form of this way of thinking. It is an AFC thought disguised in Alpha Male clothing. In no way do her actions reflect upon you.
Be strong, stick up for yourself, destroy those that disrespect you, and forget those that leave you.
Only you and you alone can judge yourself. Think of it this way: who is the only person that will be with you when you die? Who is going to be there during your life through it all?
YOU and only YOU>!!!!
Never give anybody (girl or guy) that much control over your self worth.
If a girl leaves you for somebody who they think is better than it very well could be that they are running from their true emotions/fears. Or have a very poor ability to read people. The reasons are in the billions and to assume that it is because you are doing something wrong is a factor of weakness.
Man up and let that kind of outlook go. You are worth what you are worth, and no other person can take or add to it.
I have taken girls away from their BF and later found out how great of a guy they were, and most of those girls I took away cheated on me constantly. I also cheated on them. I learned my lessons and changed my way but don't ever take a girl from somebody else.
This guy had his chance to make his move when she was single. You missed out! Learn your lesson. Next time grab your balls and ask the girl out before somebody sweeps her off her feet.
Don't be a bottom feeder or a home wrecker.