I am hurt and i dont know how to respond...

[gettingstronger]

ive been with my GF a while now, say since may time. Things are going great sort of. Pretty much like each other alot and all that shyt. Anyway she has been away for a week to visit relatives and she returned home on sunday. We hadnt spoken since then. I missed my gf and was lookin forward to seeing her again.

Any how,we all met with some friends together in a social gathering. It was set up by a friend of mine. I was sorta assuming she would come say hello to me first even when i said hello to her but instead she acknowledged the dude who set it up. I didnt like that at all.

I dont feel threatend by the dude if ur thinking this, he cannot compete with me at all. You may assume that she was beig polite or something to say hi to him first, but she totally ignored me and went to him first even when i said hello then came to me. I didnt like this.

After that i sorta say my GF and her freind on MSN and they asked me if everythin was ok ( we all chat 2gether ) because i was silent and i said yeh im fine and im tired and want to go to sleep. So i went offline. They thought i was acting weird ( i was sorta ).

Do i feel insecure? nopes , do i feel threatend? nopes , do i feel hurt? YES.
I feel hurt because i have been waitin all week to talk to her and see her again but the first words out of her mouth were to someone else. Can she not be more sensitive towards how i may be feeling?

I feel like this because i go out of my way to make sure she has no negative emotions. I turn down girls and tell her whos hittin on me, i am completley honest with her all times, i keep reassuring her that i am hers and keep her feelin good all the time because she can get emotional and insecure due to how other girls respond to me. This is why i find her behaviour insensitive. Could she not stop and think how it wud feel for her bf to see her acknowledge some other punk be4 him. I am hurt.


Tomorrow i see her again and she will question me about this:

Do i tell her the truth about how i feel?
If so, will it come off as insecure?
Should i just tell her i was feeling iil?

I dont know what to do, plz help

 

[Phyzzle]

No. Don't complain about little crap like that.

But there is a real problem: she doesn't seem too thrilled about seeing you does she? She didn't feel like seeing you Sunday or Monday, and she doesn't want to be alone with you Tuesday. That's called falling interest.

Complaining about her falling interest doesn't raise it. You need to bring back the challenge. No more constant re-assureance that you can't live without her.

 

[gettingstronger]

that is fantastic advice Phyzzle. You are spot on. The reason i re-assure her is because i dont want her to feel insecure or anything. How wud u advise i re-insert some challenge back into the equation?

 

[tuxen]

In a group situation, create some jealousy, talk to other girls, entertain them, make them laugh.

This will make her work harder for your attention.

 

[Trapper]

Do i tell her the truth about how i feel?
no never do that.. never tell like that..you would come off like a loser, insecure, needy guy.. she would dominate you get your weak points...

Should i just tell her i was feeling iil?
ya give some reasonable excuses.. just let her know that it is not a big deal..

and one thing how much you are into her?

 

[T Money]

Seems like she's wearing the pants in this relationship. Don't worry bro, i've been there.

Man the fvck up or she's gonna leave your @ss for the next bad-ass dude with a tattoo.

 

[gettingstronger]

Do i tell her the truth about how i feel?
no never do that.. never tell like that..you would come off like a loser, insecure, needy guy.. she would dominate you get your weak points...

Should i just tell her i was feeling iil?
ya give some reasonable excuses.. just let her know that it is not a big deal..

and one thing how much you are into her?

i am into her alot dude. I dont want to mess her around. I guess shes into me too.

The reason i constantly reassure her is that she believes other girls are onto me and that i may stray to them. So i keep telling her that i chose her from teh rest of the girls out there. She knows about 2-3 other girls woh have tried "picking me up" so to speak. And she also knows how i turned em all down.

Should i count her behaviour as a red flag?

 

[gettingstronger]

Seems like she's wearing the pants in this relationship. Don't worry bro, i've been there.

Man the fvck up or she's gonna leave your @ss for the next bad-ass dude with a tattoo.

Yeh im gonna do that for sure. I was like that at the begginning but it seems i let my guard down with her. I feel like i hve been taken for granted and not appreciated as much as i appreaciate her.

:trouble:

 

[tuxen]

i am into her alot dude. I dont want to mess her around. I guess shes into me too.

The reason i constantly reassure her is that she believes other girls are onto me and that i may stray to them. So i keep telling her that i chose her from teh rest of the girls out there. She knows about 2-3 other girls woh have tried "picking me up" so to speak. And she also knows how i turned em all down.

Should i count her behaviour as a red flag?

You are into her ALOT, and you GUESS she's into you too.

Your focus seems to be YOUR INTEREST IN HER rather than HER INTEREST IN YOU.

 

[gettingstronger]

You are into her ALOT, and you GUESS she's into you too.

Your focus seems to be YOUR INTEREST IN HER rather than HER INTEREST IN YOU.

good point my man good point u little pimp!!:rockon:

 

[T Money]

Just don't give in to her man, do what YOU want, not what you want HER to want you to do...(that makes sense, just read it a few times).

 

[Trapper]

dude you are the man...if she knows that you are in demand, everything is in your hand..no worries...and the fact is they do these weird things a lot..its coz of their nature...and sometimes it does hurt..for example, one girl recently did not come to the appointment which we already set up and i got so angry.. she gave some nonsense excuses but of course i did not believe...i could have kick her azz but of course i've had experienced before..so i just took it lightly.. the following meeting I fcvked her... enjoy ur life..

 

[Phyzzle]

In order to up the challenge, the next time you see her, don't touch her until she touches you first. In fact, this is a good habit in general.

Don't use IM/texting or even phone calls for any real conversations. Just use them to set up your next meeting.

It's hard to say what's causing her interest to drop, but it's usually lack of challenge.

When you are too distant, they COMPLAIN. When you are too clingy, they give you subtle hints that they don't like you so much, and then DUMP you (so it's better to be too distant).

So I'm guessing you are too accommodating for her. I don't know enough to say.