I am a failure with women and I need help please thats why we came here

[wise_mage]

guys, please help me with this - i have so many issues-
almost 3 years spent at this site and still I am a failure with women. a girl told me yesterday like within the first minutes of talking to me "you remind me of my best friend".
I hadnt done sh1t enter the friendship zne and I did.

I am 20 and I have had one girlfriend during the last 3 and a half years. I am still a virgin and terrbly ashamed of being one.
actually Im afraid of losing it now cause at my age there are almost no virgin girls left. so that means they have a lot of experience already. and I am afriad that when do get the chance to get laid eventually they will think I totally suck at sex and that I will *** like in 30 seconds of something.

I am so ashamed of being a virgin at this age. I think its pathethic. especially when you didnt want it t go that way. I shuldve ****ed the last girlfriend I was sexual with at 16 that way. I would have gotten over it already.
man I was talking yesterday to this 15 year old who had already had a threesome . the same one who told me about how I reminded her of her best friend.

its not only that, but I cant understand why I have no success with women. I never have the girls I want. Im feeling so dwn about it. why do girls keep rejecting me? lack of sex is so bringing me down. why cant I be the object of a girls sexual desire? Im certainly better looking than a lot of the guys they sleep with.
yet I am the one rejected. I try to be ****y and funny as much as I can but I get the sense that they dont think its real, eventhough they do laugh. not even the fact that Im a musician helps. whos ever heard of a musiccian who cant get laid? its absurd, I know, but now you have.

I think I need therapy. I want to have sex so bad already. I tink its pathethic that I am still a vigin at this age. makes me feel like Im not a man. specially when I hear of how everyone else is having so much sex. still I am afraid of coming off really inexperienced wit all this sexually experienced girls my age. I am afraid of telling them I am a virgin for they will certainly think that its sweet and will no longer see me as sex potential. not that they do anyway. not the ones that resemble my beauty ideal (and it isnt that high anyway - just cute curvy white chicks) .

I work out, Im fit, I am into something i love (music and art) Ive followed all of the general advice here for the last 2 and a half years . and everything , every single area of my life has improved, except women. I am still a failure when it comes to them and its a mystery to me why it is that way.

the lack of company from women ad lack of sex is having great repercussions on my being and mind. now I ve been here long enough to stay away from the nice guy behaviors, not that I ever did them much anyway. so why cant I be a hunk to them?

sometimes when I watch porn I am amazed at how the girls seem to long the guys ****sand stuff. I know its acting but I know this happens n real life and I am amazed by it. how ils actually want some guys to **** them and to suck some guys ****. I guess I find it amazing cause I am not viewed in this way by them often. almost never I would say. I ve been thinking this says something also about the unconciouss mage i may have of women, where the fact that they want to get f0cked and like holding a **** in their hands is a surprise to me.


anyway. I hope I made mysefl clear. I feel so down with my situation. after almost 3 years Im starting to lose hope.
what can I do so my sex life can improve? more accurately said, so I can have a sex life?

 

[chicksrock]

Whoa dude,
that's one of the MOST fcuked up posts I have ever read on this board..., its got contradictions galore in it..

firstly if you are going to be so fcuking horny and want sex so bad, no woman is going to give it to you..
you need to ease up buddy.. throw this fcuking complex of being a virgin away..
being a virgin doesn't make the least bit difference to your game...

1)I suggest learn about sex, and sexual techniques and how to please a woman...there is heaps of material on the internet...
once you know this,, you'll be able to give that first woman of yours the best fcuk she would have ever experienced in her life...

2) you say you've been at this site for years...I am not sure whether you are immersing yourself in the knowledge presented on this board, and also if you are taking the knowledge seriously enough

3) you are only 20? chill out ..you're fcuking young and you have a few years yet to perfect your game and nail some chicks

4) part of being a DJ is finding out who you really are...
work on your personality, your charm..practice talking to women....
practice flirting with women...be confident (that comes with knowing who you are) .. .
keep practicing ..keep approaching women.. if you put in the effort how can you fail

5) plus you seem like a cool guy otherwise.. you do music and art..and you keep fit..
see you already have some positives going for you ..
the challenge ahead of you is made easier..
keep working on your looks, your attitude .. your personality ..
work on connecting with chicks
work on making a persence when you are with chicks..

you should be able to radiate a confidence, warmth and charm that women find irresistably attractive...

if you do all the above with real focus and commitment surely you will succeed with women...(even if its a matter of probability)..

so get off your asss..
stop your whining..
get out there
and score women

AND STOP BEING SO DESPERATE
you can't meet a woman and demand having sex straight away..
you have to be patient..and slowly work your way into a woman's pants ...

good luck !

 

[Phonenix DJ]

No reason for desperation

chicksrock

You're right!

Desperation drives you nowhere!

The practice teaches you more than those rules. In fact, when you go to the battle field and fail, and than later, when you read those posts, You start to understand them in a deeper level!

Practice 2x
Rules 1x

Remember this!

Phoenix

 

[OldNumb3r7]

Agreed with above.........settle it down mang. The sex will come when you least expect. The last ex I had I didnt even expect it and I ended up owning her **** for 8 months.

Keep focused.....keep calm.

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

Wise - don't you live in Mexico yet you like white curvy chicks??

Could this be your problem that you can't relate/attract Mexican women? Could be your persona!

Maybe you need to exude more masculinity and a harder non-friendlier look/appearance!

 

[wise_mage]

chicksrock - thnk you for the good advice! as I reread my post it seemed kinda exagerated and desperate and stuff. but that was how I was feeling yesterday. still, its not like I feel very different today. just more centered. I stll want to now what sex feels like though and whats the big deal about it.
but where can I learn about like not cumming right away and lasting a while and how to move and stuff to please girls?

yeah puertorican, I live in mexico where mst of the population is brown skinned. white people are a minority (yet TV makes them look like they were a majority). I am white myself so I guess it is natural that I am attracted the most to white women.
I really cant control that. Its not a concious decision. I just see them as better looking.
now over here in mexico there arent any poor white people. over here white people are basically middle class and rich. so white girls here (especially the blonde ones whom everyone wants because there really arent any) are very spoiled and are very difficult to please. a blonde that would be considered a 6 in the united sates probably would be considered a nine here just because she waswhite and blonde. truth be told.
actually up until a few decades ago only middle class and rich people in the country were all white. now the barriers have been breaking a lot during the last decade and now lots of brown skinned people are middle class and some are very very rich as well. but that doesnt mean white people ave gotten poorer.

anyway, enough mexican social hostory 101.

I recently went to Austin Texas and the women are jst georgeous. everywhere I looked I saw a good looking chick. and all kinds of them. preppys grungys hippies goths nerdys artsy.
hot hippie arsty girls. thats totally what I want to find here there are some white hothippie artsy chicks but soince there are so few they are really hard to get cause everyone wants them.
.
over here they are all the same. Im not kidding. people in general. they are either preppy or wannabe punk like avril lavigne. as I walked the streets of austin, I wa s thinking to myself, "well I could be a great Dj here. there are so many hot chicks that if one blws me off another just as hot comes walking towards within the next 10 seconds." and it was true.

I like women with big tits and small hips small asses. thats a shape a lot of white women share. but the shape of latina women in general is the complete opposite. small breasts and huge bootys. I dont find that attractive. although for some people it would seem like paradaise Im sure.

I tried dating this mexican chick. she was really cool and stuff. a nice person and she had cute white features. but she was really brown skinned. well I tried, but somehow I felt like I was just fooling myself into being attracted.
she ater told me after we broke up that she would have had sex with me. the thing is I wouldnt have. I could not imagine me having sex with her. Im happy that ended.

anyway, got stuff to do.
but how can I be more masculine? I grew up with a single mom with no male figure except the ones on tv .
Im trying to go for this bad boy rocker persona look.

any tips on how I should dress and act for a bad boy rocker persona look?

 

[Diggs]

Trust me being a virgin will not work against you. It sets you appart from lots of giys that these girls meet. Use it to your advantage. Make them feel your picking them to lose it to, they should feel flattered/honoured.

 

[NewMan]

Your laking confidence.

Your worried about this Virgin thing. Who cares. You'll be surprised how many people your aged are still virgins.


Get over it.

Part of being a DJ is knowing that you don't need women to be happy. Here in lies your problem. You've been here for 3 yres and you have not gathered that fact? you've got to get over the woman thang. Believe me when you have them you'll wish you were single - and vice versa.

Your probably coming off as to aggressive and desperate. kick it back a notch.

Finally - you've many yrs of happy fvcking in front of you. Just relax.

 

[On_the_Top]

Originally posted by wise_mage
chicksrock - thnk you for the good advice! as I reread my post it seemed kinda exagerated and desperate and stuff. but that was how I was feeling yesterday. still, its not like I feel very different today. just more centered. I stll want to now what sex feels like though and whats the big deal about it.
but where can I learn about like not cumming right away and lasting a while and how to move and stuff to please girls?

yeah puertorican, I live in mexico where mst of the population is brown skinned. white people are a minority (yet TV makes them look like they were a majority). I am white myself so I guess it is natural that I am attracted the most to white women.
I really cant control that. Its not a concious decision. I just see them as better looking.
now over here in mexico there arent any poor white people. over here white people are basically middle class and rich. so white girls here (especially the blonde ones whom everyone wants because there really arent any) are very spoiled and are very difficult to please. a blonde that would be considered a 6 in the united sates probably would be considered a nine here just because she waswhite and blonde. truth be told.
actually up until a few decades ago only middle class and rich people in the country were all white. now the barriers have been breaking a lot during the last decade and now lots of brown skinned people are middle class and some are very very rich as well. but that doesnt mean white people ave gotten poorer.

anyway, enough mexican social hostory 101.

I recently went to Austin Texas and the women are jst georgeous. everywhere I looked I saw a good looking chick. and all kinds of them. preppys grungys hippies goths nerdys artsy.
hot hippie arsty girls. thats totally what I want to find here there are some white hothippie artsy chicks but soince there are so few they are really hard to get cause everyone wants them.
.
over here they are all the same. Im not kidding. people in general. they are either preppy or wannabe punk like avril lavigne. as I walked the streets of austin, I wa s thinking to myself, "well I could be a great Dj here. there are so many hot chicks that if one blws me off another just as hot comes walking towards within the next 10 seconds." and it was true.

I like women with big tits and small hips small asses. thats a shape a lot of white women share. but the shape of latina women in general is the complete opposite. small breasts and huge bootys. I dont find that attractive. although for some people it would seem like paradaise Im sure.

I tried dating this mexican chick. she was really cool and stuff. a nice person and she had cute white features. but she was really brown skinned. well I tried, but somehow I felt like I was just fooling myself into being attracted.
she ater told me after we broke up that she would have had sex with me. the thing is I wouldnt have. I could not imagine me having sex with her. Im happy that ended.

anyway, got stuff to do.
but how can I be more masculine? I grew up with a single mom with no male figure except the ones on tv .
Im trying to go for this bad boy rocker persona look.

any tips on how I should dress and act for a bad boy rocker persona look?

You know its funny, you think your in hell and I think its paradise brown latino women with junk in the trunk, all man I got all kinds of feelings just reading that. Its funny cause Iam in a area with basically three typed of people, ghetto hoodrats, blonde southern bells, and preppy white kids, and guess what I find the majority of them not attractive or replusive,(not necessarily in that order) thought I still consider myself a equal oppertunity employer but hey, another man's trash is another man's treasure.

 

[Slimijs]

http://www.askmen.com/love/index.html

/\
Everything you need to know about being a sex machine.

Don't be so cruel on yourself. Go clubbing, kino some chicks and have sex in the bathrooms.

 

[CLOONEY]

Wise, I remember your posts from around here for a long time now.

U sound like u have more issues than just girls.

I think u need to take some time off and do some soulsearching.

U need to love yourself before u can love a woman.

U need to spend a lot of time thinking, taking life easy and getting your head together.

Just my opinion..........

 

[RockGuitarist]

You are really, really, really, really sexually starved, and that's natural, but it's gonna bite you in the ass.

If you worry less about sex and more about having a good time with a woman, the sex will come. And once you got a woman into you after showing her what a charismatic charming piece of manflesh, let her know you can f'uck too. Don't be afraid to show your sexuality once she starts getting into you, else she'll just place you in the friend zone.

And these spoiled girls need to be put in their place. Get to it amigo.

 

[neobrood]

I am 20 and I have had one girlfriend during the last 3 and a half years. I am still a virgin and terrbly ashamed of being one.

I am 20 turning 21 and I never had a gf yet. Before age 20, I never gave a shlt at all about women... They were the last thing in my head... so much, that some people thought I was gay or somethin.

I am so ashamed of being a virgin at this age. I think its pathethic. especially when you didnt want it t go that way.

The amount of sex you have doesnt measure how much of a man you are.

Before, I knew this priest who was in his early 30s. The ladies liked him a lot. They think he's handsome, kind, smart, etc... up to a point that they feel "sinful" for feeling desires for a priest who has committed his life to virginity.

That priest IS a Don Juan...

Other people who DO have sex... arent necessarily DJs. Other people mentioned that AFCs get married, AFCs get girlfriends... etc...

what can I do so my sex life can improve? more accurately said, so I can have a sex life?

Chill, man... You are 20 and you are prolly gonna live another 50 years (if you dont die by an accident)...

At age 20, start building "social proof" by being more and more friendly with the world around you. Smile, look people in the eye... yes. That works. I tried it and I got closer to my existing friends and made new friends and acquaintances.

If you read Art of Seduction, there is a chapter that says "make yourself an object of desire".

Once the chicks see that you are damn popular, of course... they wanna get in bed with u. Why is it that in every culture, the prince is always chased around by the ladies and gets to pick the most beautiful woman (or women) from the crowd?

Because he is confident, and has a lot of "social proof".

And once you got A LOT of social proof already, you will become less and less desperate about sex.

Trust me on this. I was like you at one point.

 

[wise_mage]

thnk you guys - I have no time to answer really, I have to go rehearse with this band so Ill be quick.

my plan for gathering social proof is getting a good band and and getting known around the city. I hope it works out with this guys

the thing is I know this guy wh was in middle school wth me and e was very unpopular. now he has this punk band and they are really popular on this rich wannabe punk kids social circuit ( no offense to anyone but thats where the hottest girls are) and he is really ugly but we got together the oter day to play some guitar and I met his girl and she is amazingly hot. its absurd how physically flawless she is
.
I know that when I get a good band and it becomes popular around here everything will be better. plus Im a lead singer its definitely going to get better.

how can I look more rockstarish and bad boyish in my looks? how should I dress? Im trying t g for the look and vibe the guys in marron 5 transmit for example cause it suits my kind of music.
since im fit I have started wearing recently jeans with tight trendy shirts. bt I dont feel the look is complete yet. no tattos and peircings I dont like em. but maybe some necklaces or some jacket or the hair. I dont know. give me advice n that.

and on how to forget about not being successful with women?
the thing is its something I have wanted since forever and I havent been able to reach this goal yet. i get frustrated.
I feel very deprived of both sex and the company of women.
Im tired of feeling this way. I want a cute hot girl to hang out with and f,ck. ud think that te fact that I dont actuall have a lot of time I can use on this women thing cause Im way too involved in my music and I like t that way would be considered a challenge but I guess it isnt yet. but maybe I can use the inerest I have in my music to be a challlenge to them.

how can I do this?

thnks guys gotta go

 

[gav]

i haven't read the replies, so here's my own view of it all

you care about what other people think far too much and feel like you need social acceptance (by losing your virginity)

i'm sure you've been through all the posts before and given all the ideas a fairly good effort since you've been here for a while.

but it is not an intellectual experience you need to have... it's an emotional one. you need to get seriously pissed off with your life just now (as i'm sure you must be) and feel the pain. get the leverage you need from seeing how fvcked up your life is right now...you know you deserve better.

give this a bash
http://www.sosuave.com/vBulletin/showthread.php?threadid=53327

 

[CLOONEY]

Which city in Mexico do u live?

I know how it is being white and blond there. I was being yelled at in the streets by girls, lol. However I would HATE to live there, the young rich people I lived with and socialised with there were absolute dikcs. Seemed to think they were gods gifts to the world just because they were rich!! Plus how about the guys there, have to pay for all the dates, have to open the car door for girls, hahaha, u guys got it tough!!

 

[wise_mage]

Originally posted by CLOONEY
Which city in Mexico do u live?

I know how it is being white and blond there. I was being yelled at in the streets by girls, lol. However I would HATE to live there, the young rich people I lived with and socialised with there were absolute dikcs. Seemed to think they were gods gifts to the world just because they were rich!! Plus how about the guys there, have to pay for all the dates, have to open the car door for girls, hahaha, u guys got it tough!!

I live in a city called Queretaro. what part of mexico did u live in? where are u from originally?
yep. blonde people are yelled at here.
yep. young rich people are ****s generally. and ususally they don get along with poeple that arent white. u know how in europe or the US being white is just a common everyday thing cause everyone is. well, here its a symbol of status. white people are assumed to be better in general, richer, smarter, more beautiful.
not only by white people but by brown people themselves (the vast majority) . its the whole spanish conquest thing and its social aftermath 500 years later.
plus catholicism is so strong here that getting laid is harder to do.
we have it really damn tough.

 

[CLOONEY]

Hey wise, I sent u a PM, did u get it?

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

Wise, your frustration lies in the fact that the girls who you are attracted to are a minority in Mexico and usually come from snobbish social/economical hierarchical lines.

Rock bands are fairly popular in Mexico now - wasn't there a rock band from Puerto Rico touring there for six months?? Being in a band should help your game!

Hang around more venues where there are the kinds of girls who you are attracted to - I would think 'Rock' venues would be the place to find them!

Yeah, I know what is going on in Latin America - Telemundo/Univision and other media outlets are trying to promote the 'White' European conquistadores as the supreme beings and only have them in the media while 90% of the Indian/Native majority are 'left out'!!!

 

[CLOONEY]

From my experience there, most of the "cool", "rock" guys are the ones without the money..........and most people seem to date confined to their social circles, or perhaps from within their university (for younger people).

Hey and take it easy on telemundo PRL, lol, one of my friends is the producer in Mexico.