I always feel like I need an excuse . . . anyone else feel like that?

[Tropix]

Hey guys

I'm a high school senior, not too bad looking (not getting girls without trying hot . . . obviously id say abt a 7), I really have a lot of things going for me (some decent friends, good in school, not "popular" but I have my group), but I'm just so shy around people I don't know. I've caught a few pretty cute girls (in other grades, who I have no real contact with) looking at me multiple times, but I just have no idea how to talk to them. I always feel like I need an excuse to talk to them. One of those girls even came up and started talking to me, but me being the shy doo-mas I am, didn't even manage to build a connection.

I guess my biggest problem is conversation topics. I just can't come up with anything ever. Give me something to start on and I can talk forever, but its coming up with that topic, and that reason for talking to someone that really gets me. So I guess this begs the question, anyone else ever feel like this, and how do you deal with it?

Sorry about the length, and my wordy-ness.

Thanks bros

 

[PleasureKing]

well, first tell me, how do you view yourself. a nerd, jock, average, what? if you view yourself in a positive way, you really shouldnt have a problem in conversating.

go to the gym 3 times a week, and workout. the endorphins and other hormones will boost your self-esteem and you wont need excuses anymore.

P.S: check your personal message.

 

[Steg]

Join the club. If you got a solid wingman that's gonna help you out a lot since you get a good clean start.

Tip: the funny ones are good.

 

[superchristx]

When you can't think of anything to say the truth about what's around you. I think it's called pacing?
"I noticed your encredibly bright red shirt and suddenly I was standing here."
"The lockers look like faces"
"It's pretty wierd that I'm just talking to you now, about nothing."
"You aren't a very good conversationalist. What do you do when you have to be with normal people?"

or you can make up a game. Kill Marry Foock is a game where you point to a group with 3 guys (or girls) and make her pick which one she would kill, marry, and **** knowing that she'd have to assign a different one to all 3.

Or you can tell her that you bet she can't throw a penny into your pocket or get so-and-so to show their buttcrack. Highschool is great because nobody knows anything, so what the hell do they have to talk about. Just gab at somebody, and they'll be thankful because other people will think they're cooler just because they're talking to somebody.

 

[Tropix]

Yeh, also . . . will they think it's weird if I just talk to them. I dunno to me it seems like I would come off kinda creepy and weird. Mainly because I am a shy kid and its rare that I talk to anyone I don't know very well, so I think it would seem pretty out of character for me to just suddenly start talking to someone I don't know too well, and the cute one that was talking to me early is also pretty shy, so the two of us trying to have a conversation was pretty comical...

That said any more advice would be appreciated . . . n thanks to the guys who already responded . . . I think it all comes down to the fact that I'm a recover(ing)(ed) nerd/victim of jr high . . . I whipped myself from a fat kid to a near six pack (gonna get that soon just gotta get the bottom two to appear), I've been working out at the gym 3-4 times a week for about a year now, I'm a decent runner (don't win meets or anything, but not bad for a once fat kid), I'm applying to a bunch of great schools, I'm a decent skier working on my jumps, I have some good friends and occasionally get invited to the "cool kid" parties, but for some reason I have no confidence in myself. Sometimes I do think of myself as a pretty cool, attractive person, but as soon as I'm put into a situation where I feel uncomfortable (talking to people I don't know) all of that drains out and I just get too scared to be risky and fun, I play it safe and boring.

Welp that was a lot longer than I intended it to be but thanks a lot guys and anymore advice on talking to people is appreciated . . .

Thankyas

 

[PleasureKing]

Yeh, also . . . will they think it's weird if I just talk to them. I dunno to me it seems like I would come off kinda creepy and weird. Mainly because I am a shy kid and its rare that I talk to anyone I don't know very well, so I think it would seem pretty out of character for me to just suddenly start talking to someone I don't know too well, and the cute one that was talking to me early is also pretty shy, so the two of us trying to have a conversation was pretty comical...

That said any more advice would be appreciated . . . n thanks to the guys who already responded . . . I think it all comes down to the fact that I'm a recover(ing)(ed) nerd/victim of jr high . . . I whipped myself from a fat kid to a near six pack (gonna get that soon just gotta get the bottom two to appear), I've been working out at the gym 3-4 times a week for about a year now, I'm a decent runner (don't win meets or anything, but not bad for a once fat kid), I'm applying to a bunch of great schools, I'm a decent skier working on my jumps, I have some good friends and occasionally get invited to the "cool kid" parties, but for some reason I have no confidence in myself. Sometimes I do think of myself as a pretty cool, attractive person, but as soon as I'm put into a situation where I feel uncomfortable (talking to people I don't know) all of that drains out and I just get too scared to be risky and fun, I play it safe and boring.

Welp that was a lot longer than I intended it to be but thanks a lot guys and anymore advice on talking to people is appreciated . . .

Thankyas

i used to be like that "shy guy who doesnt talk to strangers" type, but now im not. just try it once or twice. you will get a weird feeling the first time, but after that, through experience, it will feel natural.

just think, everyone is boring. its up to you to spice up their lives. KICK EM IN THE A$$! :kick: haha