I’m dealing with a breakup - Oneitis tips please

[darksprezzatura]

I ended a relationship with an HB 6.5 of an year.
I fell in love with her, but kept banging like 12-15 girls over the year because I saw a lot of red flags or the relationship being doomed. Now that it has ended, I realise I have mild oneitis for her due to my daily routine of talking meeting or smashing her.

I’m not proud that I’d been cheating on her but it seems that the breakup isn’t hurting as bad as it would’ve otherwise when I already knew it’d end. I had hopes it would become okay, but unfortunately it didn’t.

I know the drill. You can give me some support or tips to start off this process.

 

[darksprezzatura]

I’m sorry I’ve been away for so long guys, I missed you all.

 

[darksprezzatura]

Quick overview:
- My health tanked during this relationship
- My hobbies tanked
- My friends started getting annoyed with my issues
- I realised late that she has severe anger issues that she started taking out on me 6 months down the line, her brother made me realise today that it’s a real thing, she’s hit people before, she’s even hit her sister with a heel as a college kid
- lots of guy friends, no concern if I feel comfortable or not
- she had no care to ask about my day or life
- didn’t show any real curiosity about my life
- has had a history of violence with people, she used to start fights with random people men or women even in the subway
- lawyer, very argumentative
- stonewalled during conflicts knowing its a trigger for me
- never took constructive criticism in her stride
- never liked to lose even at the most trivial things
- pcos/pcod
- family was so conservative, they would not allow us to get together long term
- never shaved much or trimmed

This last point was the nail in the coffin for me, I’d rather quickly cut my losses than keep investing in a relationship that’s doomed from the beginning.

 

[RickTheToad]

You have to get it out of your system. Find other holes to fill.

 

[anonymous12345]

Welcome back @darksprezzatura. What's fascinating about you is your dysfunctional nature, but I'm amazed that you land that many girls during one year. How do you do that?

 

[soulforge]

You really know how to charm someone.

A nice welcome back to SS lol

 

[anonymous12345]

You really know how to charm someone.

I see your point. Well, yes and no.

It was partly based on @darksprezzatura's previous posts. (That was before you started frequenting.)

I skipped some steps in my previous post. I don't judge a person by whether they're "dysfunctional"/etc (one can look at me too) in some manner. I respect them, see them as a human beings no matter what. Do my best with myself. It includes @darksprezzatura's escapades -- I appreciate that dude just as much. This wasn't written above.

And I do would like to copy his skills for being that successful.

 

[Scars]

You banged 15 other girls and still have oneitis? Lol.

You need to find some real hobbies, because apparently not even different pvssy can save you.

 

[Divorced w 3]

Quick overview:
- My health tanked during this relationship
- My hobbies tanked
- My friends started getting annoyed with my issues
- I realised late that she has severe anger issues that she started taking out on me 6 months down the line, her brother made me realise today that it’s a real thing, she’s hit people before, she’s even hit her sister with a heel as a college kid
- lots of guy friends, no concern if I feel comfortable or not
- she had no care to ask about my day or life
- didn’t show any real curiosity about my life
- has had a history of violence with people, she used to start fights with random people men or women even in the subway
- lawyer, very argumentative
- stonewalled during conflicts knowing its a trigger for me
- never took constructive criticism in her stride
- never liked to lose even at the most trivial things
- pcos/pcod
- family was so conservative, they would not allow us to get together long term
- never shaved much or trimmed

This last point was the nail in the coffin for me, I’d rather quickly cut my losses than keep investing in a relationship that’s doomed from the beginning.

Is her name Samantha by any chance?

 

[self_is_an_illusion]

Quick overview:
- My health tanked during this relationship
- My hobbies tanked
- My friends started getting annoyed with my issues
- I realised late that she has severe anger issues that she started taking out on me 6 months down the line, her brother made me realise today that it’s a real thing, she’s hit people before, she’s even hit her sister with a heel as a college kid
- lots of guy friends, no concern if I feel comfortable or not
- she had no care to ask about my day or life
- didn’t show any real curiosity about my life
- has had a history of violence with people, she used to start fights with random people men or women even in the subway
- lawyer, very argumentative
- stonewalled during conflicts knowing its a trigger for me
- never took constructive criticism in her stride
- never liked to lose even at the most trivial things
- pcos/pcod
- family was so conservative, they would not allow us to get together long term
- never shaved much or trimmed

This last point was the nail in the coffin for me, I’d rather quickly cut my losses than keep investing in a relationship that’s doomed from the beginning.

Your health and hobbies suffered, your friends became distant – these are signs that your life was off-kilter. Begin by rebuilding yourself. Reconnect with what makes you thrive. Cultivate your interests, strengthen your friendships, and commit to personal growth. This isn’t just about getting over a relationship; it’s about rediscovering who you are beyond it. Remember, real power in life comes not from finding the ONE, but from having control over your own life. Break free from the chains of ONEitis. Embrace the possibility of multiple ‘good Ones’ out there, and more importantly, embrace the journey of being the best version of yourself. This is your wake-up call to a life unshackled from the myths that have been holding you back.