"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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HS girls can be tough...

DJSkySurge

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In times of need, I turn to the Internet, and here I am. I stumbled across thi site and initially clicked through, until I started reading some of the forum posts. It seems like there are some people on here with considerable experience of the situation I find myself in.

Now I'm in the second half of my teenage years, and so naturally I've started to go to parties more. I'm quite tall for my age, so normally not much happens; the girls my age think I'm older than I am am the older girls can tell I'm not! However, this was not the case the other night.

I had a brief chat with a relatively good-looking girl, and did 'all the right things' : I appeared interested but not eager, and confident but not ****y. It wasn't a long conversation, but it wa a successful one from my point of view. However, tragically, I was on wingman duty for several friends and could not break the hallowed codes. She followed me around for the rest of the night, flicking furtive glances at me which I tried my best to pretend to ignore. Here's where you guys come in.

I probably left it a bit long (3 or 4 days after the night) to come up with the trusty Facebook add, because I couldn't remember what her surname was for the life of me, but add her I did - at which point I expected things to be plain sailing. Not so.

Being a typical awkward teen, I don't really know what to say. Our only eConversation went something like this:

Me: Hey! You are the girl from the other night, right?
Her: Yeah I was :) x
Me: Thought so! Sorry I didn't get a chance to talk to you a bit more on the night! I was stuck on wingmam duty! xD
Her: Was nice talking to you though!
Me: Yeah, likewise actually :)

...and things died there. Help me salvage this, DJs! What should I do? All (links to) explanations of DJ jargon (e.g. 'kino') would be much appreciated.

Thanks in advance,

(Aspiring) DJSkySurge
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

NorwegianDJ

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Yeah. It's great not to appear too interested, but when it interferes with getting the girl, then it's just too much.

And personally I hate 'xD'.

Just chat with her. It didn't seem negative at all to me. Organize a meetup
 

DJSkySurge

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At my school we have a strict wingman policy. I'll explain it some time, it's very detailed.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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DJSkySurge

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My HS's Wingman Rules

Here are the rules, roughly:

1) The designated wingman(men) are selected at least 48 hours before the night. During the first 24 hours they can lodge a complaint or appeal against their selection, after which time their fate is sealed.

2) The designated wingman(men) may not talk to other girls except with the intention of sending them towards their friends or finding out numbers/names for a night outside of the current one.

3) The designated wingman(men) may use various techniques at his(their) discretion, but only if the person(s) they are acting on behalf of are content with these methods.

Hence I was bending the rules, but quite frankly she was worth it.
 

DJSkySurge

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Having read the "Introduction" section of the 'Bible, I feel a bit silly for posting this. Sorry if I've wasted anyone's time!
 

BPH

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Sometimes when I'm out with friends we'll call "dibs". This is done before we even meet the girls sometimes and it only lets whoever called dibs take the first shot. If it's a crash and burn she's fair game.

This is just a little something, nothing like these rules and guidelines mentioned above. Unless one of your really good friends had a thing for this girl I don't think you should have given her up.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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eastcoast15

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BPH said:
Sometimes when I'm out with friends we'll call "dibs". This is done before we even meet the girls sometimes and it only lets whoever called dibs take the first shot. If it's a crash and burn she's fair game.

This is just a little something, nothing like these rules and guidelines mentioned above. Unless one of your really good friends had a thing for this girl I don't think you should have given her up.
Agreed
 
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