"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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How's my progress towards mastery?

diceman

Don Juan
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First thing was in a tent with some girl in newquay. She was touching me and sorta lying on top of me. My friend was next to me snogging some girl. The inevitable didn't happen unfortunately because I chickened out. My mates I was with said I made a decent choice since she was reasonably large and not so pleasing on the eyes.

Then (still in newquay, a debauched place I'm telling you) i was in some cavaran (my mate lost his virginity to a horrible drunk girl in there, a bit iffy...) and some girl i had talked to, a rather imposing figure in general, kept calling me a **** but then she sorta kissed me and licked my neck in a way. I just sat there politely.

Then there was a party back home, thrown by a lovely christian flautist from my orchestra. He cracked open pretty much all the alcohol in his house and put it on the kitchen table. I had enough booze to make me confident. I had heard from that this girl liked me, which seemed to be confirmed when I spoke to her/touched her etc. We were standing face to face, noses touching, sadly I wasn't quite drunk enough and couldn't manage it. A while later I talked to her again (plus around 5 units) and lunged for her bottom lip. She pushed me off and said something I forget. I thought "oh well" and fell asleep in someones vomit. Next morning she walked through town with me, bought me breakfast and walked me to my bus stop. Not sure what that was about, best leave her alone.

And finally the science club girl. We had a lovely day together just at the end of exams, had a picnic and went to her house and played time crisis three together. When we've been hanging out together at someone's house we cuddled and held hands but little more. Since she's got the tiniest amount of experience with guys (she said i'm "the closest thing she's had to a boyfriend") maybe it'd be nice to not rush it. Who knows?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Teflon_Mcgee

Master Don Juan
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My advice:
1.) give up the booze when you are trying to pick-up. You seem to HAVE to rely on it. It won't help improve your game at all if you're always drunk when you hook up.

2.)*IF* you have the patience for the science girl then stick with her for a while. Let it put you at ease that *her* inexperience will magnify *your* experience (IOW, she has nothing to compare you to, so you really can't screw up.) This will allow you to build your confidence level and gain some experience.

Goodluck!
 

Taviii

Master Don Juan
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If you need to be drunk as hell to kiss a girl when your noses are touching then you are probably gay.

This is the wrong forum for you mate.
 

Paper Boy

Banned
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Aug 30, 2006
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Coming along rather nicely, I"ll say. I'll be expecting big things from you in the future.
 

disfunktional

Don Juan
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I don't know why but reading that just cracked me up, p!ssing myself laughing! Not laughing at you dude but the way you wrote it was genius.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

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