I mean a friend with no romantic interest previously shown, no LJBFing before, even talked about and counseled each other over previous crushes/partners. She's attractive, I'm attractive, and I want to trigger in her the same feeling I have, the feeling of "let's just do it, there's nothing wrong with it". Well?
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
How would you turn a good female friend to become fvck buddies?
- Thread starter Reckoning
- Start date
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Igetit!
Moderator
No "previous" romantic interest shown. You mean from both sides,meaning none shown from her to you and from you to her? Because if that's the case,and you to have been friends...good friends for a long period of time,then more than likely,you CAN'T.Reckoning said:I mean a friend with no romantic interest previously shown
Women develop sexual interest based off of how they feel. So if there has been no sexual interest shown from either side.....ever,then she has no sexual feelings from which to draw on to make something happen between you two. And if she's known you for a while and you try to date her,she'll probably pull out the old "I don't see you that way" line on you.
And she'll be right and telling the truth.
A girl doesn't have to actually say the words,"Let's just be friends" for you to be friendzoned. In fact,most of the time,the being ljbf'ed happens LOOOONG before she ever speaks the words.Reckoning said:no LJBFing before
Her saying the words just let's you know the decision she made a while back.
And this is bad. This is what girlfriends do with each other,or what guys do when discussing girls,but it should NEVER happen between two people of the opposite sex if one has an interest in the other.Reckoning said:even talked about and counseled each other over previous crushes/partners.
She may be attractive. And you may be attractive as well,but the problem is that you two are different genders.Reckoning said:She's attractive, I'm attractive, and I want to trigger in her the same feeling I have, the feeling of "let's just do it,
You're a man,and she's a woman. The way a man is attracted to a woman is different from the way a woman is attracted to a man.
If she has a pretty face and big boobs,you're attracted to her. And if she still has the same pretty face and big boobs in an hour,chances are you'll still be attracted.
Not so with girls. She can be attracted to you one minute,turned off the next,and you'll never know why or what happened. You can be standing there talking to a girl and things seem cool,then another person can show up,and all of the sudden she seems distant,cold,or standoffish.
If you and this girl have been friends for a while,you can't just all of the sudden out of the blue decide,"Ok,I want her feel sexual and horny for me now". Doesn't work that way.
It all really depends on how long you've known her AND how close of a friend you two have been to each other.
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Well, we go a while back as far as knowing each other goes, but we got closer in the past few months. She often brings up sex in a conversation or facebook chat, even though she's not that "liberal". She always goes all soft on me, like "I love you" and that kinda crap, most of it is playing fun, but she does it aaaalll the tiiiime, and lately I've been starting to think it's not all great friends stuff, I've never really acted like what this forum would define as a "wuss" or "AFC" in front of her, so a few days ago a thought crossed my mind "hey, why not fvck her". And then I posted this thread.It all really depends on how long you've known her AND how close of a friend you two have been to each other.
And...
This hasn't been my experience with girls. You just described only a select few that I've known (and I have a wiide social circle), and those are girls that don't know what they want, or didn't really want it in the first place. Or are on PMS. When a girl likes a guy, she is driven, just like a guy would be when he likes a girl. Of course, even this is probably generalizing, it likely depends on the girl, but most of them are like this. At least 90 % of the ones I know.She can be attracted to you one minute,turned off the next,and you'll never know why or what happened. You can be standing there talking to a girl and things seem cool,then another person can show up,and all of the sudden she seems distant,cold,or standoffish.
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My thoughts on this are, turning such a friend into a FB is probably not a good idea. That is, if you enjoy the relationship you already have (and if you don't, why are you spending so much time together?). Turning a close friendship into a romantic relationship is probably possible, but is that something you are both looking for?
If you value her as a friend, then why bother? There are so many other girls you could be going after, that it doesn't make sense in my mind to try and change anything with her. Especially since it probably won't work anyway.
If you value her as a friend, then why bother? There are so many other girls you could be going after, that it doesn't make sense in my mind to try and change anything with her. Especially since it probably won't work anyway.