"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

How would you handle this.

playerone

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 5, 2008
Messages
349
Reaction score
6
Location
A place where dreams become reality
Alright, let's see. If your girlfriend had a bad habit which would pose health risks, what would you do?

Would you tell her it's bad and get her to stop or advise her and leave it up to her?
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

KontrollerX

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 11, 2005
Messages
4,476
Reaction score
182
I would handle it by screening out girl's with bad habits in the very beginning.

Smokers, drunkards and druggies are relegated to fvck buddy status and nothing more.

EVER.

There will not be any instance of my trying to change a girl into what I want her to be.

This is one of the follies of both the male and the female AFC mindset.

Trying to change someone to be the perfect relationship partner for them rather than seeking out someone that is already perfect for them.

To try and change someone is fighting an uphill battle as genuine change only occurs when an individual person wants to change and an individual person seldom wants to make a longterm lasting change to be more acceptable in a relationship with someone who they feel should already accept them as they are.

Trying to change a chick is also playing the captain save a h0 role as therapist or coach and these are places no true DJ ever finds themself.

Its not noble to do this, its idiotic.
 

playerone

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 5, 2008
Messages
349
Reaction score
6
Location
A place where dreams become reality
Hmm. I get your point. In my case, I meant that my girlfriend is taking a lot of painkillers, like 5 pills a day, for her menstrual cramps. And they are not helping out a lot, so i tell her it's not good on the body to take them in large doses. I was just wondering if i should get her to stop, or just tell her my opinion and leave it up to her.
 

KontrollerX

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 11, 2005
Messages
4,476
Reaction score
182
Tell her your opinion and leave it up to her.

You could even suggest that if she's in a pile of pain that maybe she should see her doctor and ask about it and they can run some tests to make sure she doesn't got someother problem causing the pain to be extra severe.

Yeah though this is all you can or should do for any chick you are involved with.

If they don't take the suggestions to heart and decide to then change course on their own continuing to try to change them or persuade them to go a better direction is a futile effort.

Its at that moment a guy in this situation needs to ask himself if he is ok continuing to remain with that girl while she engages in the undesireable activity or if he'd rather be free of his worry about it and go find a different girl for himself who doesn't engage in that activity.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

Messarger

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 11, 2006
Messages
83
Reaction score
1
Kontroller X, why do you relegate smokers, druggied to FBs? Considering that we DJs will not be influence by them, should we be alright with the bad habits? Or is it a case of passive smoking fvcking up our lungs?
 

KontrollerX

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 11, 2005
Messages
4,476
Reaction score
182
Messarger said:
Kontroller X, why do you relegate smokers, druggied to FBs? Considering that we DJs will not be influence by them, should we be alright with the bad habits? Or is it a case of passive smoking fvcking up our lungs?
Well I'm not a relationship having guy in general but what I was saying with my post is if I were smokers and druggies would never seriously be considered by me as an LTR candidate because smoking and drinking and other nasty habits like that are red flags as far as I'm concerned and I do not want to expose my lungs to that unhealthy sh!t by living with some girl day in and day out which LTR relationships can progress to and definitely they progress to living together if you marry some chick.

So thats just my personal red flags, if any other DJ's here are hardcore smokers or drinkers of course have at it as far as making women that are also hardcore smokers and drinkers your LTR girl if you deem her suitable to be in an LTR relationship with you.

Anyway to answer your other question I don't think a DJ should put up with any bad habits from a woman that really pisses that particular DJ off as if you simply keep looking you can probably find a girl that is already up to your own personal standards already rather than her being some project you'll have to change to make suitable for you.
 

Messarger

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 11, 2006
Messages
83
Reaction score
1
Interesting, i guess i have to keep on finding then ;)
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

Captain Harlock

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 13, 2009
Messages
358
Reaction score
3
Location
The Netherlands
Drugs, cigarettes and alcohol = good

probably the only kind of girlfriend I'd want is one that is into psychedelics and who likes alcohol.
 
Top