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How would you guys handle this text?

TheNewStyle123

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What's up guys.

I've known this girl for 2 months now (just started dating about 3 weeks ago) and as some of you have seen my from previous posts I felt really confident I wanted to be exclusive with this girl (and still do). But here is a text I got from her today. What are your thoughts? I have not confronted about it yet, but keep in mind she is Brazilian (new to the US as of 3 years ago) and I am not sure if some of the lingo or context is the same as in the US:

HER: "good morning gorgeous! I had fun yesterday so much! and I'm so glad I met you! I'm in love with you my baby (heart eyes emoji x3) have a pretty day."


Gulp.


Lol.

Obviously at this point in my life (recent divorce) I do not love this woman (even pre divorce I wouldn't say "I love you" to someone that fast!). but I really enjoy spending time with her and being exclusive. She checks off all of my criteria (personality, looks, kindness, submissive, intelligent) and our sex/her BJs are the best I've ever had...
 

Serenity

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Unless you love her then simply don't mention it at all. Just reply what's true for you, that you enjoyed it too and whatever else positive you have to say. Also noticing that she said "I'm in love with you" which is not quite the same as "I love you", so you'll likely get away with omitting the word "love" and otherwise reply positively.
 

2Rocky

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Don't acknowledge the "ILU" and don't respond to it, or just mirror it and keep doing what you are doing. Some women LOVE everything.

Beingthat you are ok being exclusive it wouldn't kill you to drop an ILU sometime....
 

RickPound

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That tells me her interest level is sky high and right on par with saying the L word. She might actually “love you”, be “in love” with you, or just use the word more casually. But if she’s never said it before, it’s most likely one of the first two.

Either way, if you want things to progress with her, obviously this is good. You want her to fall in love, or say it, first…

You’ll be fine interpreting it as just casual use and proceed by ignoring it and not saying it back yet. But just know that she might mean it and start to wanna hear if from you. You’ll know soon enough if that’s the case. And like others have said, it won’t hurt to throw a few “love you too babe”’s in soon. You might have to.

I know the feeling of not wanting to say it if you don’t mean it though. A previous LTR of mine went downhill because I wouldn’t budge and say it because I didn’t truly feel it.
 

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TheNewStyle123

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Unless you love her then simply don't mention it at all. Just reply what's true for you, that you enjoyed it too and whatever else positive you have to say. Also noticing that she said "I'm in love with you" which is not quite the same as "I love you", so you'll likely get away with omitting the word "love" and otherwise reply positively.
I agree, thanks man! My initial response was something along the lines of I really enjoyed spending time with her, and she did not call me out for not saying "I love you" back, so that's good.
 

SirBigBell

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These “I love you” or “im in love with you” texts are the ultimate traps for nice guys. They feel bad if they dont say it back, so they end up reciprocating when they dont feel the ssme, because they’re nice guys.

I would have responded to the text using the word “love” but in a slightly different context, for example:

“I think you are lovely and really love spending quality time with you. Come up to my place tomorrow evening if your diary permits”
 

ThisIsSparta

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HER: "good morning gorgeous! I had fun yesterday so much! and I'm so glad I met you! I'm in love with you my baby (heart eyes emoji x3) have a pretty day."
Good morning sweetie(whatever you call her)! I had great fun too yesterday and love the time we spend together. Have a beautifull day!
 

samspade

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Just enjoy it. You're under no obligation to respond in kind.

Brazilian women (if they're from Brazil) tend to be very romantic-minded, they "fall" for guys easily that is. They also just tend to be super nice. But as long as you're comfortable with who you are, you can't control if she's "in love" with you, just how you handle it. The above responses are good, you handled it well.

BTW Brazilians tend to be low-drama in my experience, EXCEPT in matters of jealousy.
 

derby1

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reading the replies, its interesting how men give women leeway, pass cards, or it even makes us happy for a woman to show H.I.

if the roles were reversed, she would lose all interest/possibly ghost if you ever confirmed you liked her.
 

TheNewStyle123

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Just enjoy it. You're under no obligation to respond in kind.

Brazilian women (if they're from Brazil) tend to be very romantic-minded, they "fall" for guys easily that is. They also just tend to be super nice. But as long as you're comfortable with who you are, you can't control if she's "in love" with you, just how you handle it. The above responses are good, you handled it well.

BTW Brazilians tend to be low-drama in my experience, EXCEPT in matters of jealousy.
So true man. All of the Brazilian women I have talked to have been such a pleasure. So kind. Drama-free. But you are correct about the jealousy thing! haha
 

TheNewStyle123

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reading the replies, its interesting how men give women leeway, pass cards, or it even makes us happy for a woman to show H.I.

if the roles were reversed, she would lose all interest/possibly ghost if you ever confirmed you liked her.
Right?! Dude if this was me saying "I love you" or "I'm in love with you" to a woman (especially an American girl) this early on she would turn and run. I would seem desperate, needy, and beta.
 

ThisIsSparta

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reading the replies, its interesting how men give women leeway, pass cards, or it even makes us happy for a woman to show H.I.

if the roles were reversed, she would lose all interest/possibly ghost if you ever confirmed you liked her.
Either this or feel "empowered" enough to start acting up.

A lesson hard learned ..... one doesnt just text a woman that he has feelings for her.
 

TheNewStyle123

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These “I love you” or “im in love with you” texts are the ultimate traps for nice guys. They feel bad if they dont say it back, so they end up reciprocating when they dont feel the ssme, because they’re nice guys.

I would have responded to the text using the word “love” but in a slightly different context, for example:

“I think you are lovely and really love spending quality time with you. Come up to my place tomorrow evening if your diary permits”
Great ideas man! When this gets brought up again, I will use the same lingo in a different context like you suggest.
 

TheNewStyle123

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That tells me her interest level is sky high and right on par with saying the L word. She might actually “love you”, be “in love” with you, or just use the word more casually. But if she’s never said it before, it’s most likely one of the first two.

Either way, if you want things to progress with her, obviously this is good. You want her to fall in love, or say it, first…

You’ll be fine interpreting it as just casual use and proceed by ignoring it and not saying it back yet. But just know that she might mean it and start to wanna hear if from you. You’ll know soon enough if that’s the case. And like others have said, it won’t hurt to throw a few “love you too babe”’s in soon. You might have to.

I know the feeling of not wanting to say it if you don’t mean it though. A previous LTR of mine went downhill because I wouldn’t budge and say it because I didn’t truly feel it.
Yeah man, that's the point where I am at. I am going to take everyone's advice and proceed with caution - matching her lingo without saying "I love you" until it absolutely gets to the point where she calls me out on it (if she does).
 

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derby1

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Right?! Dude if this was me saying "I love you" or "I'm in love with you" to a woman (especially an American girl) this early on she would turn and run. I would seem desperate, needy, and beta.
I wouldnt even use the word "Like". in the UK,. we have a quote "you knowwwzzzz I like ya" its purely a fun saying that most people are aware of, you could possibly slap her shoulder when you say it in a playful way.....

Whenever I used it a few meets in, the woman always smiled , but she would literally do a 180', every single one of them

cant even use a playful quote
 

Hank Moody

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Her "I'm so in love with you" sounds like a cultural thing. You know, like how it's common in South Korea to see straight, male friends hold hands in public.

I don't think she meant that she loves you and wants to get married tomorrow.

I have to be sure...does she have all her papers? She's a full-fledged citizen, right?

If the answer's Yes, then you don't need to be alarmed.
 

TheNewStyle123

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Her "I'm so in love with you" sounds like a cultural thing. You know, like how it's common in South Korea to see straight, male friends hold hands in public.

I don't think she meant that she loves you and wants to get married tomorrow.

I have to be sure...does she have all her papers? She's a full-fledged citizen, right?

If the answer's Yes, then you don't need to be alarmed.
Hahahaha great question Hank. Yes she is a full citizen and has papers. I agree with you - the way she talks to me in person and the things we discuss leads me to believe this is more of a cultural thing. Good to be vigilant though..
 

Lookatu

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In my experience, both latin men and women tend to be on the passionate side and say these kinds of things without real weight or merit.
They say it more in a casual/impulsive way and that is how it should be interpreted. I wouldn't put too much thought into it.

Let both of your actions do the talking instead.

Just tell her you enjoy being with her and that she makes you feel good.
 

Modern Man Advice

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What's up guys.

I've known this girl for 2 months now (just started dating about 3 weeks ago) and as some of you have seen my from previous posts I felt really confident I wanted to be exclusive with this girl (and still do). But here is a text I got from her today. What are your thoughts? I have not confronted about it yet, but keep in mind she is Brazilian (new to the US as of 3 years ago) and I am not sure if some of the lingo or context is the same as in the US:

HER: "good morning gorgeous! I had fun yesterday so much! and I'm so glad I met you! I'm in love with you my baby (heart eyes emoji x3) have a pretty day."


Gulp.


Lol.

Obviously at this point in my life (recent divorce) I do not love this woman (even pre divorce I wouldn't say "I love you" to someone that fast!). but I really enjoy spending time with her and being exclusive. She checks off all of my criteria (personality, looks, kindness, submissive, intelligent) and our sex/her BJs are the best I've ever had...
First things first, no one loves someone that fast. Granted love is subjective, generally speaking, love takes time. It is an emotion/feeling that is born out of trust, respect, ups and downs, laughs and tears, it simply takes time. So her saying that or her light use of the "I'm in love with you" is something to consider and break down.

But to your question, you don't acknowledge that part. But feel free to be open and acknowledge the rest of the text, if you are comfortable with that by saying. "Yeah, yesterday was great. Time sure flies with you, and I'm glad you are part of my life."

But I can't help to go back to that "I'm in love with you". In your honest opinion, what drives her (since you know her) to say such a heavy thing to you only after 2 months? What is her relationship with her parents like? What was her childhood like? Have you vetted this girl out by asking her about her previous relationships both at an emotional and sexual level? And so on an so forth...


Modern Man Advice
 
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