"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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How would you deal with a shock collar?

The Experience

Don Juan
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For about five years I had hyperhidrosis (HH) which lasted through my HS years and freshman year in college.

HH causes your body to sweat profusely with little to no stimulus.
Hyperhidrosis is to social situations as asthma is to sports.

This occurred mainly in my hands, which are of course, a way many people interact by.

Having HH conditions yourself to avoid touch and stay in your 'comfort-zone' while reinforcing itself if you may step outside the boundaries by releasing some devastating sweat equal to that of how far you stepped out, therefore disabling and restricting your thoughts and actions. If I was with a group of people that were not my close friends I would be silent, I would not speak unless spoken to and even then I didn't know what to talk about. I was constantly awkward.

In HS I learned nothing that was memorable except that I picked up marijuana. I went through almost like a ghost.

After HS is where I think I gained the most progress so far. I realized I did not want to stay shy and anxious around people. I started reading everything I could find on the internet and even bought an e-book 'dating to relating' by Mr R Lx or whatever, trying to obtain information so I could get over it, however I've seemed to have misplaced this feeling to keep learning NEW things, any idea how I can get it back?

So for the first year in community college I built up enough confidence to ask my first girl out, but she flaked and so I deleted her number, no big deal. About a month ago I had gotten the surgery to stop the HH, however you end up with CS (Compensatory Sweating - sweat mainly in the back, chest, actually everywhere else besides the hands/armpits, go figure). Having my hands dry has let me forget about much of the sweating so I can even lead a little bit of conversation. Then had sex with a girl at work (which wasn't the best idea, not for me or her, but for the people I work with, however I was mentally prepared for the backlash and also I was just ready to have sex). And now I'm planning on moving out of my parents house in September.

Basically after HS I wanted to become a better myself so I started reading and doing stuff very much similar to Sammo's writings although I just read a lot of his stuff yesterday.

So now I feel I can use eye contact to attract, I've put on muscle by going to the gym (although I only go maybe once a week right now since I just seem to be less motivated to work out) and I have learned how to talk to most people (however I have no clue how to lead it anywhere - any help with this?). However when talking to 'HB's I can talk, but before I talk my sweating kicks in and I don't feel as confident. Talking and sweating seem to become heads or tails sometimes. This is dependent on how attractive I feel they are. Basically I need to desensitize myself from being nervous around attractive women. Any tips to overcome the anxiety without too much backlash?


Any help in dealing with this would be cool.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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The Experience

Don Juan
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Nobody has any advice, huh?..
 

Darth_Qurashi

Don Juan
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I dono man, I mean i would just say practice makes perfect. Keep doing your thing, it might not work in the beginnign, but the more you do, the more you'll get used to it and won't notice and make a big deal about it.

eventually, it'll be natural, and it'll all work out.

Practice talking to people you don't wanna bang, but analyze it after and just remember what you did back there and how you did it. Then practice small talk, practice talking to girls casually, like u know asking for time, directions, just randomly mention an observation to a girl, then walk away like u don't even care, that's always fun
 
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