How/When do you reward your women?

[LeonSK]

DJs, as an alpha male, you reward women when they behave well. I'm just wondering how you guys do it.

Background: I sent flowers to one girl the second day after we had sex. It seems to scare her away.

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

DJs, as an alpha male, you reward women when they behave well. I'm just wondering how you guys do it.

Background: I sent flowers to one girl the second day after we had sex. It seems to scare her away.

She may have taken this as a gesture that you were wanting something more out of the relationship than what she was ready for. I guess it all depends on the situation.

A few weeks ago I brought a chick flowers. She was going to cook me dinner, and had done a few times prior. Up to that point, other than one round of drinks, gas to get to her place, and condoms, I hadn't spent any money on her. She had even taken me grocery shopping asking me what I wanted her to cook, and she paid for it all. So....flowers were due I thought. They were out of the blue and well recepted, really not needed though, more of a forsight to later down the road when we get in an argument and she says I never do anything nice for her (been there). Plus, I honestly wanted to something for her since she had been treating me like a king up to that point.

Maybe it's the context of how you went about it. Sending flowers to someone at home or at their work I think is different than bringing them when you already have a date set up.

 

[LeonSK]

She may have taken this as a gesture that you were wanting something more out of the relationship than what she was ready for. I guess it all depends on the situation.

A few weeks ago I brought a chick flowers. She was going to cook me dinner, and had done a few times prior. Up to that point, other than one round of drinks, gas to get to her place, and condoms, I hadn't spent any money on her. She had even taken me grocery shopping asking me what I wanted her to cook, and she paid for it all. So....flowers were due I thought. They were out of the blue and well recepted, really not needed though, more of a forsight to later down the road when we get in an argument and she says I never do anything nice for her (been there). Plus, I honestly wanted to something for her since she had been treating me like a king up to that point.

Maybe it's the context of how you went about it. Sending flowers to someone at home or at their work I think is different than bringing them when you already have a date set up.

Maybe that's why, it's only our first date...

 

[LeonSK]

Just read Pook's Anti-Dump Machinese (http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=40188), "A Don Juan never gives flowers, cards, or gifts for the first two months. Her birthday is the only exception."

 

[Turuwal]

As an alpha male, great significance is attached to even the tiniest of your gestures of affection. Your attention is the greatest gift that any woman could ever receive. Anything more is a gift form the gods. And the gods do not bestow their gifts lightly, nor do they lower themselves to the level of mere mortals in giving trinkets and flowers.

In seriousness, keep them sparse, and make them different.

 

[asa_don]

Just read Pook's Anti-Dump Machinese (http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=40188), "A Don Juan never gives flowers, cards, or gifts for the first two months. Her birthday is the only exception."

that's lame, being an alpha means you are a leader and you can do what you want when you want. if you feel like giving something as a gesture you can. you don't do it all the time, but there is no reason that you can't. you can reward them to whatever is necessary at that partcular moment, it doesn't have to be at one occasion, it can be at anytime. even something small is a reward.

 

[donjuanapprentice01]

Gifts come in many forms. Not all of them are physical (like flowers). The greatest reward you can give a woman is making them feel the gift is that they are part of your life. Having them ENJOY the life you lead is the greatest reward they can get.

Now, I agree with asa don, you can give tiny gifts here and there, just not too often. But my favorite "gift" to give is take them on a nice day out, go for a roadtrip, or something of that nature. Or take them out to a nice restaurant once in a while. This is a gift that involves both of you.

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

I would not 'reward' a girl for having sex with me. The sex is the reward in itself, for mutual attraction.

The only 'reward' is more sex =)

 

[Desdinova]

I rewarded a woman for six months of faithfulness by giving her a rose after we had sex. Flowers must be earned from me.

If a woman does something really nice for me, I'll do something nice in return. She does my dishes? I'll take her out for ice cream and pay. Or maybe I'll rub her feet. Reward her good gestures and she'll keep doing them.

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

^^^^This just reminded me of something a buddy of mine once said. Simply put: Treat em like you would your dog. Reward them for good behavior, stick em in the kennel for bad (figuratively of course). Too many guys will buy a chick flowers or treat them better only when the girl gets angry, or acts distant. Don't get into the habit of doing that. If you want to do something nice, then do it directly after she has done something nice or special for you....

 

[LeonSK]

^^^^This just reminded me of something a buddy of mine once said. Simply put: Treat em like you would your dog. Reward them for good behavior, stick em in the kennel for bad (figuratively of course). Too many guys will buy a chick flowers or treat them better only when the girl gets angry, or acts distant. Don't get into the habit of doing that. If you want to do something nice, then do it directly after she has done something nice or special for you....

I did it the second day after we had sex. Is it considered "directly after"?

 

[VladPatton]

I eat nothing but snickers bars and drink strawberry juice for 24 hrs., so when I coat her tonsils with he-man ball chowder, it tastes fantabulous for her!

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

I did it the second day after we had sex. Is it considered "directly after"?

Like the others said, sex is a reward in itself. She should be doing nice things for you, because you're blowing her out and giving her orgasms. She should be giving you massages, cooking you dinner.... that kind of thing. All you have to do is give her orgasms....

However, a nice gesture on your behalf, after multiple days of her doing these "extra" things for you, is to let her know she's doing well

Never "thank" her for having sex with you. That is the wrong frame of mind you want the relationship to be in. She needs to be thanking you.

 

[LeonSK]

Like the others said, sex is a reward in itself. She should be doing nice things for you, because you're blowing her out and giving her orgasms. She should be giving you massages, cooking you dinner.... that kind of thing. All you have to do is give her orgasms....

However, a nice gesture on your behalf, after multiple days of her doing these "extra" things for you, is to let her know she's doing well

Never "thank" her for having sex with you. That is the wrong frame of mind you want the relationship to be in. She needs to be thanking you.

Many thanks, Peaks&Valleys! Yes I fxxxed her solid (delivered one of my best performances). She should be thanking me!

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

Many thanks, Peaks&Valleys! Yes I fxxxed her solid (delivered one of my best performances). She should be thanking me!

Now we're talking!

 

[Desdinova]

Simply put: Treat em like you would your dog. Reward them for good behavior, stick em in the kennel for bad (figuratively of course).

The unfortunate reality is that this is true. I used to have a signature that said "Giving a woman flowers when she's behaving badly is like rewarding your dog for 5hitting on the carpet"