"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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How To Transition From A First Date To A Relationship?

Ice882

Senior Don Juan
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I know it can't happen immediately. There is a period of organic development. But how can I manage the situation to keep things on track? Is there a particular MO for getting into an LTR? I've never had one before, just hook ups.

Thanks so much.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Warrior74

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Let her bring it up. I know I'm headed to a relationship when she starts asking "what are we?" When I peruse a relationship, it never works out. Sit back and relax and let her ask for it.
 

Weezy

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Warrior74 said:
Let her bring it up. I know I'm headed to a relationship when she starts asking "what are we?" When I peruse a relationship, it never works out. Sit back and relax and let her ask for it.
don't bring it up. Just take her on 1 date a week for a couple of months and she'll bring it up.

They gotta want it. Most girls I date bring it up after they start letting you hit it. Normally like 4-5 dates.
 

kingw

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Don't let your mind go crazy on you, just sit back and relax.

AFC thinking is the greatest danger!
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Da Realist

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I have a general obeservation about this: have enough fun and woman will eventually come along to "ruin" it. She'll see a good thing going and will want to be part of it as long as you can make her feel special and happy. I know that sounds cheery and rosy, but it's the truth.

When a guy can stop being mechanical and analyzing everything to try to get a relationship, he loosen up and make her feel a lot better being out with him. The more good feelings she gets, the more she comes around, and then out of nowhere you have this person who for at least the short term will stick to you like a stalker.
 

Ice882

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so should i behave like I did before the first date, negging and poking fun?

I feel like that would keep things superficial...but I guess if I went out with her once a week for a few months we would be forced beyond the superficial?

Or should I be a little nicer (I know, I know, don't be a nice guy, but I mean nice in a non-AFC I'll-do-anything-for-you-just-ask way. I mean like being compassionate when she's really tired or just failed a test. As in instead of poking fun at it, I give her a little sympathetic kino (hug, pat on the arm) and then try to bring her out of her funk with "friendlier" humor?
 

xdreamz

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being nice is good. i know it's confusing because nice is such a vague terminology but niceness is always good and can be attractive, it just appears insecure and monotonous (boring) if you're nice too much.
 
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