"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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How to stop worrying?

Starriol

Don Juan
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I sometimes worry about things... most of my worries comes from fantasy, that is, they are either very highly improbable or they never happen.

I've read a book that says 99% of our worries never happen.

This is true, looking back in all my lifes worries.

The point is, how do you stop worring about something you recognize is pure fantasie and it's never gonna happen?

Even though I realize this rationaly, sometimes I can't get some worrys of my mind, it's very bad with me...
Thanks.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Alphathree

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You could try learning some NLP (Neuro-linguistic programming)

Generally, you'll want to structure your worry as an external behaviour and an internal state. For example:

"I think that when I grow old, women won't be attracted to me anymore"
( external behaviours )

"and that makes me worry about my future"
( internal state )

Now you can break this down logically with any of the following tools. For example you can try a counterexample:

Have I known any older men that are with attractive women? Obviously yes-- there are many.

Or you can do it by trying to paint the problem with a wide brush:

Is it the case that there are absolutely no women who like older men? Obviously not.

You can also do what David DeAngelo calls "chunk down". In this case, you might say:

By what logic can I conclude that women don't like older men? Well, they're older and more wrinkly. So what? That's rediculous because as long as a man takes care of himself, older men have more confidence, more resources, etc.

Anyway, you can apply this technique to almost any psychological problem you're having, especially ones involving women.

EDIT: I could share other NLP things with you, but you'd literally need to hear my voice... :D
 

jballa24

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you could try affirmations, they say the average human takes 21 days to change a habit. Wheather it be a phobia or worrying or performance anxiety it can be changed in 3 weeks with persistance and motivation. Write down some positve affirmations and repeat them to yourself 10 times a day for 3 weeks and see how you feel, im doing it right now!! hope i could help.
 
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