"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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How to stop oneits

Zerotwoonenine

Senior Don Juan
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hey guys i have noticed that many of us, even master DJs, when falling for a girl or really liking her, develop a oneits and become AFCs.
How do you like the girl but at the same time, dont go back into an AFC, its so hard, it seems that everytime we like some1, all the rules just seem to go out the window and then there goes the meaningful relationship.
How do you have a meaningful relationship, really like her(i mean to the point where you are falling for her) but still keep on DJing and stop your self being a AFC so you keep having the good relationship.
IS IT POSSIBLE TO HAVE ALL 3???:eek:
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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JPFromTally

Senior Don Juan
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When I was a kid growing up in NYC and NJ I had a lot of Italian friends. Most of the older fellas had "cumares". You might have heard of it on the Soprano's pronounced coo-mah or goo-mah. Well anyway, the term refers to having a mistress - usually one who knows you have a wife and is ok with that.

So there you go - the answer to your question.
 

Jariel

Master Don Juan
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I believe that it's possible to have oneitis and still stay in control just by maintaining confidence in yourself. I mean, just because one woman takes over your thoughts doesn't make you less of a man, less attractive, nor does it force you to supplicate and kiss ass. These are choices guys make when they don't know how to handle oneitis, as their way of winning the girl over.

DJs know better. Even if you are head over heels for a girl and your emotions are out of your hands, you still know that you must not kiss her ass, put her on a pedestal or take disrespect. You know you need to give her space and you need your own space to get on with your own life.
 

Rebound Material

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Jariel said:
I believe that it's possible to have oneitis and still stay in control just by maintaining confidence in yourself. I mean, just because one woman takes over your thoughts doesn't make you less of a man, less attractive, nor does it force you to supplicate and kiss ass. These are choices guys make when they don't know how to handle oneitis, as their way of winning the girl over.

DJs know better. Even if you are head over heels for a girl and your emotions are out of your hands, you still know that you must not kiss her ass, put her on a pedestal or take disrespect. You know you need to give her space and you need your own space to get on with your own life.
Basically, just have ALOT of discapline over yourself.

Try your best to put logic before emotions.
 

Mental

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Zerotwoonenine said:
hey guys i have noticed that many of us, even master DJs, when falling for a girl or really liking her, develop a oneits and become AFCs.
How do you like the girl but at the same time, dont go back into an AFC, its so hard, it seems that everytime we like some1, all the rules just seem to go out the window and then there goes the meaningful relationship.
How do you have a meaningful relationship, really like her(i mean to the point where you are falling for her) but still keep on DJing and stop your self being a AFC so you keep having the good relationship.
IS IT POSSIBLE TO HAVE ALL 3???:eek:
It's tough, but I think it's a combination of what these other guys have said and having/seeing prospects.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

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