"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
How to spin plates with AFC mindset.
- Thread starter AAAgent
- Start date
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
I wouldn't call myself the most DJ guy here, but ill give my 2 cents.
There are currently 3 girls that I am actively working on. I generally see them atleast once a week each. While I am not sleeping with all of them (not really my intention)
Basically, i treat them like friends sort of. I do kino/kiss all of them etc... but I make time for them like you would friends. You may hang out with 7 different friends on 7 different days. No big thing.
There are currently 3 girls that I am actively working on. I generally see them atleast once a week each. While I am not sleeping with all of them (not really my intention)
Basically, i treat them like friends sort of. I do kino/kiss all of them etc... but I make time for them like you would friends. You may hang out with 7 different friends on 7 different days. No big thing.
its hard to fake real emotions of interest and i think women can tell when a man is interested or not unless you have alot of experience in the field. how do u still hang out with them and "Spin" these plates if u have no feelings and they know it?
or is it more about having fun and whatever happens happens and they can still be your friend the next day?
or is it more about having fun and whatever happens happens and they can still be your friend the next day?
I think it is easier. When I focus on a single girl, i show too much interest and act nervous etc... However, when i have multiple girls, I care less. I have feelings for these girls. Out of the 3 I am seeing now, there is one that I really like & could see a relationship with down the road (but her interest in me seems to be lower), one that I know likes me, but I am not sure how to feel around her, and basically 1 who really likes me, but I just use.AAAgent said:
So I have some feelings for all of them, but have stronger feelings for some in comparison for others. Basically, I just focus on having just a good time with all of them.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
ya i was doing that at one point too with 3 girls. one really liked me, the next one liked me but tried to keep it friendly and the last one we both mutually liked each other and ended up dating. but she would give me the time of day until i flat out rejected the other two and rumors spread about how bad i dissed them for her and she finally came around... All these girls knew each other, the one girl that liked me alot but i wasn't too interested in almost fought with my ex.
i guess i was already set on that one girl last time, maybe this time i'll keep my mind and emotions open, but i did feel like i filtered them out last time.
how also do u keep them from finding out about each other. where im from its almost impossible to take one of those girls out to the club or something with me because another one of them might have friends there, or post pictures and such. I know movies, dinner, bowling and things of that nature might be okay but how do u avoid social places or is there a way around it saying your just "friends"?
i guess i was already set on that one girl last time, maybe this time i'll keep my mind and emotions open, but i did feel like i filtered them out last time.
how also do u keep them from finding out about each other. where im from its almost impossible to take one of those girls out to the club or something with me because another one of them might have friends there, or post pictures and such. I know movies, dinner, bowling and things of that nature might be okay but how do u avoid social places or is there a way around it saying your just "friends"?
What the fock is this shyt? Seriously? Are you guys serious?
Spinning plates with an AFC mindset? You don't. AFCs don't spin plates. You are not spinning plates here. Drop your AFC mindset.
At the very least, you can tell a girl that you are "dating" right off the bat. Never discuss if you are sleeping with them or not. NEVER. That way she can at least respect your honesty. But know this...she will push for an exclusive relationship at some point and when she doesn't get it, she will leave. Be mentally prepared for that.
This is not a friendly game being a "DJ". It's not nice. We all can't get along. If you aren't ready to get your hands a little dirty, if you aren't ready to tell some small white lies, if your not ready to move beyond your main circle to hunt for women and to strictly control how far into your life each woman comes, then find one girl and settle down. You have to be mentally strong in this game.
Spinning plates with an AFC mindset? You don't. AFCs don't spin plates. You are not spinning plates here. Drop your AFC mindset.
I don't even understand what that means? That's called dating. wtf?
You had it right until you got to the part aboutr friends. Women are not your friends. They are your physical and emotional entertainment. Drop that "lets all be friends"crap. You can be nice, you can be sweet, you can be friendly and show interest, but she is not your friend. Get that out of your head right now. Your girl'friend' is your friend if you go into a straight square relationship, but if your spinning plates, they are not your friend.
Don't "spin plates" with girls who know each other. You just learned this lesson the hard way. When you spin plates you get girls from different social circles. One's who go to different colleges, different schools, different strata of society. Different sides of town, different races, differnt clicks and social groups. Something to separate them. Look at each plate as something new you want to experience...want to experience the rave scene? have a raver girl, or a goth girl, or a rich girl, or a trashy townie local girl, you get me?
At the very least, you can tell a girl that you are "dating" right off the bat. Never discuss if you are sleeping with them or not. NEVER. That way she can at least respect your honesty. But know this...she will push for an exclusive relationship at some point and when she doesn't get it, she will leave. Be mentally prepared for that.
This is not a friendly game being a "DJ". It's not nice. We all can't get along. If you aren't ready to get your hands a little dirty, if you aren't ready to tell some small white lies, if your not ready to move beyond your main circle to hunt for women and to strictly control how far into your life each woman comes, then find one girl and settle down. You have to be mentally strong in this game.
Warrior74 said:
Totally agreed. I always keep my plates from ever knowing/seeing each other. If they ever asked if I was dating someone else, I might say something like "we are not exclusive, so Id really prefer to not talk about that" or something to that extent, so I wouldn't be lying.
Love the idea of "experiencing" different things. I like to keep my plates separated like that as well.
Rollo Tomassi
Master Don Juan
AAGENT, please, do me the courtesy of reading this thread thoroughly before you continue in this thread:
Plate Theory
You have a very immature understanding of Plate Theory, do some homework first.
Plate Theory
You have a very immature understanding of Plate Theory, do some homework first.
thanks for the link. it cleared up some of the questions i was looking to be answered.Rollo Tomassi said:
but since the main question was worded badly, let me re-word it "how do you date multiple women, while you search for the one your going to choose and still keep your composure?"
basically do any of their efforts get to you guys and change your opinions and how do you deal with it?
“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
KontrollerX
Master Don Juan
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- Oct 11, 2005
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"how do you date multiple women, while you search for the one your going to choose and still keep your composure?"
Yoda had it right...
"You must train yourself to let go of everything that you fear to lose."
So don't let yourself be motivated by fear to commit to any one woman that you are dating because of a fear she may covertly place in you that she will move on if you refuse to commit and take the supposed wonderful connection you both had away from you.
Infact if you meet such a woman that pulls such a manipulation on you she is to be immediately cut off from your life as she is worthless to it.
To have the best results in life you have to be the one guiding each scenario to where you'd like it to go.
Avoid women who fight and struggle with you covertly or overtly for power by playing power games with you but if you insist on persuing such women always make it clear to them that it is you who may leave her at anytime and always convey that if she were to leave you that you'd be absolutely fine with it and wish her well in her life.
Certainly women enjoy being wanted but you can never safely let them believe that they are wanted to such an extent that they can use your desire for having them in your life as leverage over you.
Always be willing to walk away and let any woman who threatens to move on do so.
Do not allow a woman to defeat you with power games and again even cut that type out of your life once you identify one.
"or is it more about having fun and whatever happens happens and they can still be your friend the next day?"
Indeed spinning plates is all about dating a woman and having fun with her but perhaps the most important lesson you have to learn is if you want a relationship with a woman you must evaluate her yourself and whether she is worthy of a relationship with you where you expose yourself and your true emotions to her.
Meaning you have to search for genuine qualities of her being a good person by your standards of what a good person is.
Search for that and ignore the typical b.s relationship cutesy flirtation high interest level type of smoke screens that fool most guys into thinking they are with a good relationship candidate.
Again ignore that and instead silently asses any particular girl you are considering for a relationship by whatever measuring stick you use to determine whether a girl is a good, kind and genuine person.
Establish that and do not be blinded and pay no mind to feminine charms as far as judging quality of a relationship candidate goes.
Yoda had it right...
"You must train yourself to let go of everything that you fear to lose."
So don't let yourself be motivated by fear to commit to any one woman that you are dating because of a fear she may covertly place in you that she will move on if you refuse to commit and take the supposed wonderful connection you both had away from you.
Infact if you meet such a woman that pulls such a manipulation on you she is to be immediately cut off from your life as she is worthless to it.
To have the best results in life you have to be the one guiding each scenario to where you'd like it to go.
Avoid women who fight and struggle with you covertly or overtly for power by playing power games with you but if you insist on persuing such women always make it clear to them that it is you who may leave her at anytime and always convey that if she were to leave you that you'd be absolutely fine with it and wish her well in her life.
Certainly women enjoy being wanted but you can never safely let them believe that they are wanted to such an extent that they can use your desire for having them in your life as leverage over you.
Always be willing to walk away and let any woman who threatens to move on do so.
Do not allow a woman to defeat you with power games and again even cut that type out of your life once you identify one.
"or is it more about having fun and whatever happens happens and they can still be your friend the next day?"
Indeed spinning plates is all about dating a woman and having fun with her but perhaps the most important lesson you have to learn is if you want a relationship with a woman you must evaluate her yourself and whether she is worthy of a relationship with you where you expose yourself and your true emotions to her.
Meaning you have to search for genuine qualities of her being a good person by your standards of what a good person is.
Search for that and ignore the typical b.s relationship cutesy flirtation high interest level type of smoke screens that fool most guys into thinking they are with a good relationship candidate.
Again ignore that and instead silently asses any particular girl you are considering for a relationship by whatever measuring stick you use to determine whether a girl is a good, kind and genuine person.
Establish that and do not be blinded and pay no mind to feminine charms as far as judging quality of a relationship candidate goes.
oakraiderz2
Master Don Juan
In all seriousness...are you retarded?