wakingup
Don Juan
Just curious how you would respond if a woman you were seeing asked about your thoughts on feminism? Do you respond in earnest, parse your words, or lie?
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
I've read enough on feminism to understand what I don't like about it (mostly that it generally wishes for the biology of the sexes to be different than it is based on "rational" thinking. Put another way, to me, feminists think that because we are so "civilized" or "advanced" that we can just tell ourselves how to behave and override our biological urges in the favor of women), but I'm curious to hear some other people weigh in on how they'd respond to a woman who says something like "I'm just a feminist because I believe that women deserve to be treated fairly." Something along those lines.I'm straight up. I tell her I think it's the scourge of society, but I also know how to explain why. Most of them are on-board with me. The ones who aren't respect me for being a man and not changing my tune just to avoid offending them.
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Can't wait till the courts treat men and women equally."I'm all for it - can't wait until ALL American women can have the opportunity to fill out a selective service card."
Say:I've read enough on feminism to understand what I don't like about it (mostly that it generally wishes for the biology of the sexes to be different than it is based on "rational" thinking. Put another way, to me, feminists think that because we are so "civilized" or "advanced" that we can just tell ourselves how to behave and override our biological urges in the favor of women), but I'm curious to hear some other people weigh in on how they'd respond to a woman who says something like "I'm just a feminist because I believe that women deserve to be treated fairly." Something along those lines.
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
No but I think her head was about to explode. I asked her if she wanted me to talk to her like a woman. I still want to tease the kitty but I am holding myself back from sending a text. "Good luck in finding your androgynous she male! That is the most fun I had in a long time. I was in full on ass hole mode teasing the crap out of her.Was the person asking holding a copy of ayn rand?
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.