How to Respond to a Lack of Reply

[Hughman]

You know the drill - you're getting involved with someone, it all looks good, and suddenly they stop contact, 'coincidentally' when you just told them they could tag along with you when you next go out. You know they have their phone with them, it's on, they're at home etc and yet they refuse to reply to texts and make up bs when you call them.

So how do you go about getting them to give you a straight answer? That is 'Yes, love to meet up', or 'No, I'd rather not' (or is that really impossible?)

Do you send another text chastising them for their rudeness? Do you repeat the question? Be a sarcastic-flirt? Restart the convo and ignore the previous question? Or simply move on?

 

[SupaDupa]

You know the drill - you're getting involved with someone, it all looks good, and suddenly they stop contact, 'coincidentally' when you just told them they could tag along with you when you next go out. You know they have their phone with them, it's on, they're at home etc and yet they refuse to reply to texts and make up bs when you call them.

So how do you go about getting them to give you a straight answer? That is 'Yes, love to meet up', or 'No, I'd rather not' (or is that really impossible?)

Do you send another text chastising them for their rudeness? Do you repeat the question? Be a sarcastic-flirt? Restart the convo and ignore the previous question? Or simply move on?

from personal experiance....just cut conntact, if they were interested at all , you will here back from them sooner then you might think.

 

[Hughman]

Hmm, but I never do when I just leave them. That's my issues here. Probably because I'm still nervous about the whole game and a bit chumpish.

 

[parrot84]

hey man ... it all goes to self esteem! do you want do be with someone who doesn't even give you a reply! THAT'S A BYTCH RIGHT THERE THAT DOESN'T!

don't be lame! cut off contact! and if she comes back to you again, BE VERY STRICT!

 

[Hughman]

hey man ... it all goes to self esteem! do you want do be with someone who doesn't even give you a reply! THAT'S A BYTCH RIGHT THERE THAT DOESN'T!

don't be lame! cut off contact! and if she comes back to you again, BE VERY STRICT!

As I thought, but it just seems odd to leave them to make contact, which I was under the impression you should not let happen.

Once I get out of my 'rents house I'd just leave it, but atm my access to women is poor. Chances to get numbers are rare (though I get them 95% of the time when I do get the chance)

Maybe I should tell a mutual (female) friend that I think it's rude and i don't have time for it as I'm a busy man and my attention is wanted by others. Helps to create social proof, discord between women and shows I'm walking away, no?

 

[COD]

When Chics Flake Article On Here Was Good One

 

[Hughman]

Flaking....

So that's what it's called.

Thanks man, I'll search

 

[DohnShaft]

No Contact is always the way to go...if you respond with anything else you will seem desperate and that definitely won't help you out. It's her loss. NEXT

 

[I'm in the Mood]

If you cut contact with her you're essentially doing the same thing that she's doing to you.

The better way to do this is to mention that shes been a bit indifferent lately and ask her if it has anything to do with you asking her to hang out with you.

This should open her up to the matter and you can take it from there. If she stays the same, don't bother, next.

 

[Hughman]

If you cut contact with her you're essentially doing the same thing that she's doing to you.

The better way to do this is to mention that shes been a bit indifferent lately and ask her if it has anything to do with you asking her to hang out with you.

This should open her up to the matter and you can take it from there. If she stays the same, don't bother, next.

Well, it's too late now, message sent:

'Hey
Seeing as you obviously don't wish to spend the time of day to reply to my offer, I've found someone more willing to help me shop tomorrow.
Hope you have a nice Easter : )
Peace
______'

A bit needy and AFCish I know, but at least I'll know for sure where I stand (which is probably in the no pile, but I want a damn answer)

 

[Scars]

Act unaffected by it. If it's a sh!t test, then you'll win. If not, then let her be a b!tch. In your mind, consider her a NEXT. If she attempts to contact you then be nice and contact her back, but don't go out of your way to talk to her.

 

[I'm in the Mood]

Ah dude she won't like that message. It shows frustration because you're trying to lower her value, yet you're still talking to her and being nice.
Now she knows you're desperate for her to answer back, and this wont really change her mind about the matter.

Don't worry about getting a verbal answer because you've reduced your chances from "maybe" to "probably not."

You don't want to worry about anything to do with her, you've done all you can and she hasn't contributed at all. You offered to talk/text with her, it seems that she's declined, your offer must now close because you should be spending your time talking to people who respect you by answering back.

 

[Scars]

You failed.

 

[Igetit!]

Act unaffected by it. If it's a sh!t test, then you'll win. If not, then let her be a b!tch. In your mind, consider her a NEXT. If she attempts to contact you then be nice and contact her back, but don't go out of your way to talk to her.

Too late for that Scars. He said that he just send her a message. And jugding by what he wrote,it'll be obvious to her that he was affected by her not replying. I read it,and it seems to me that he's a bit angry over it. Too late,she won. She got what she wanted out of it,which was an emotional reaction,which to her means that he was more emotionally invested in her than she was in him.

Game over.

My guess is now that she'll either start to avoid him,or she'll switch to Attention wh0re mode,meaning that she'll continue to keep in contact with him from time to time,but not because she likes him,but simply because she gets her ego pumped up over so easily having a guy who she's not even dating so heavily invested in her with little to no effort on her part.

If it was a test,I'm sorry,he failed.

 

[Scars]

Lol... EPIC FAIL.

http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl...mages?q=EPIC+FAIL&ndsp=18&hl=en&sa=N&start=18

Hahaha!

That reminds me of my "rave" scene days.. *shivers*

 

[Iamnotacrook]

Supa called it. They go cold, you ignore them. Don't keep giving them attention if you aren't getting a return on your efforts.

 

[I'm in the Mood]

Supa called it. They go cold, you ignore them. Don't keep giving them attention if you aren't getting a return on your efforts.

People on this site often confuse not going out of your way for her with ignoring her.
You don't ignore people. Instead, change your behavior and shift your focus away from them.

 

[Iamnotacrook]

Okay, I wasn't confusing it, but I guess my language could confuse a newbie. Obviously I don't mean ignore them if you bump into them or something.

 

[Hughman]

Yes, yes, I gathered I ****ed up. I remember reading somewhere on here off one of the vets that if you're planning on sending a message, sit on it for a few hours, maybe sleep on it for good measure.

And yes, I wouldn't have sent it now with hindsight. Ah well. You live and learn. 4 more months till I'm 18 and then I don't have to depend on digging for scraps in my current social circle (though I might try cold approaching again now I know the score - my best ever success was off a cp but that's when I was still a major AFC so I ballsed up)

Thanks anyway guys.