How to rebound from a mistake made the day after?

[psycocommy]

Ok, here's the set-up:

I'm currently living in Japan, with only a month or so before I leave. Last week my friends and I met some girls and hung out with them for a while - I wasn't too interested though, because I basically assumed they were out of my league.

Last Friday we went out again and to my surprise, I noticed one of them showing some interest - a few hours later I'm in bed with her, while her friend is sleeping on the couch.

Everything was fine until she left the next day, at which point I thought that since I only have a short time left (and she knows it), I should invite her out again the same day. Anyway, I basically over did it, probably freaked her out and things ended in a "sorry I'm busy this week, but let's hang out sometime" message.

Normally I'd just drop it, but I actually liked her more than I expected and with so little time left here, don't want to give up yet. Any suggestions at this point? How long should I wait before I contact her again or should I just drop it unless she makes the first move? It's just annoying because things were going better than expected until I blew my cool...

 

[MrS]

Give it a couple days.
In the MEANTIME, find others "out of your league"

 

[Daniel Di Lorenzo]

Yep. Everytime I screw up by over asking or over calling, I stop and think: "How can I fix this?" Usually, just give her a little time and neg her a little when u talk to her... be ****y and funny..

 

[mikeyb]

I just successfully got myself out of a very similar situation today with a 2-week old long-distance relationship. Actually, it was even worse because when we hooked up this weekend we had some issues in bed and she was pretty pissed since we're not going to see each other again for a few months (never mind what the damn issues were!).

I used a few neg hits, but I think what really made the difference was that I had a really great day today and that came across in the phone convo we had. I was just cheerful and upbeat, and that kind of attitude tends to be contagious. The bottom line is that she's gotta believe that your life is great with or without her.

My theory on this is that over-calling, appearing to need her, and that type of behavior in general decreases your social value in her eyes. Therefore you have to increase it again or the attraction will just wither away.

 

[psycocommy]

Yeah, it's kind of rough here because nobody calls - everyone just texts on their cell phones, which doesn't leave much room for back and fourth. You pretty much just have to nail it on the first try.

 

[vitor]

Hmmm Its monday why not ask her out for drinks on thursday,

 

[Bonhomme]

Minor mistake. Give it a little time, and the small things will fade and the bigger things (like how she felt when you were together) will be in her mind.