"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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How to react?

Levex

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Had plans to go out with a girl,went out a couple of times already. she calls that day in the morning and says she promised her guy friend who couldn't find a date for some event that she'll go with him " as friends",did offer to meet up the following day instead but then i'd be busy. Bit agitating that we made the plans a few days ahead and then she promises to be some other guy's date, even if he really is her friend...

At this point strongly considering deleting her number. I like her, but wouldn't lose any sleep if i never see her again.

Am i the only one who sees something wrong with the whole situation? Am i getting dikked around or what?

Thanks.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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pipe007

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you guys have only gone out two times, that's not a lot of times

so you really can't think negatively at her because its not like you are dating her.... she can do whatever she wants at this point

but she is showing low interest not only by cancelling your plans, but TELLING you that she is going to be someone else's date??? WTF.

I would delete that number, and let her contact you again, and if she doesnt, its over.

but let her be the one who comes after you, you have already done your part, and she knows you are interested, not much you can do at this point. NEXT
 

Levex

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Lucifero said:
That doesn't really help me. She sounded excited to meet up with me when making plans and did offer to meet up some time in the next few days instead, but the fact that she's willing to reschedule our date to go out as her guy friend's date is what bothers me. She told me to call her, but i told her to call me instead when she gets some SURE free time, pretty sure she'll call but debating whether to pick up the phone on her or not thats the question.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Lucifero

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Levex said:
That doesn't really help me. She sounded excited to meet up with me when making plans and did offer to meet up some time in the next few days instead, but the fact that she's willing to reschedule our date to go out as her guy friend's date is what bothers me. She told me to call her, but i told her to call me instead when she gets some SURE free time, pretty sure she'll call but debating whether to pick up the phone on her or not thats the question.
Whatever.
 

Tiguere

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Whether she is spinning plates or not is irrelevant . This pvssy hasn't even made a move on her
 

Levex

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Tiguere said:
Whether she is spinning plates or not is irrelevant . This pvssy hasn't even made a move on her
hey f@gboy go troll somewhere else.
 

john_trenor

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Hey Levex,

I wouldn't worry about it just yet. And, you shouldn't make any rash decisions based on one thing she did.

That said, I know it feels aggravating to not only have her cancel plans made days before, but also cancel them to hang out with some dude... and that dude happens to be her ex!

In most cases, I would say that a woman that does that crossed the line by a mile. However, if you've only gone out on a couple of dates, the relationship is still in the casual stages - you're still getting to know each other and she still has not figured the time she wants to spend with you into her day to day schedule. I'm saying that it takes just a bit more time for a woman to change their mindset about how she prioritizes her time when she first meets a guy.

In the worst case scenario, she likes you but is impulsively testing you (it's actually a good sign if you know how to react). My advice to you is to be a strong man this time around and give her the benefit of the doubt. Do not chase after her and do not scorn her for changing the plans on you. When you see her next, be confident and the best guy ever. Doing so will show her that you are stable, because she couldn't get a rise out of you, and that you're actually quite the catch, because you concentrate on the positive feeling of the moment rather than dwell on past bs.

If she does it something like this again. My advice is to calmly confront her and then break it off (that is very powerful). If she realizes her mistake, she will come after you.

Good luck my friend!
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Nkognito

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Levex said:
hey f@gboy go troll somewhere else.
He is kind of right though when you look at it from a "outside the box" view. We know the following;

1) You and her have been on a few dates
2) She flaked on a date for another man

So in essence you and her have not had sex & if you had then there is simply no reason she would be flaking on you if you were laying the pipe right. As I type this I look to the right and see the icon that pretty much descibes your situation,

:kick: <---


At this point in time you should not be sweating what this girl is doing, you should be however, blowing her off like she was a crumpled kleenex on the ground. I would hate to see what would happen if you two got it on for a few weeks and she did this. Then we would see a oneitis thread about her perhaps. But seriously stick to a typical 3 strike rule.

1) If she does not text back (strike 1)
2) If she flakes (strike 2)
3) If you text her to setup a date and she either does #1 or #2 then its strike 3.
 

Levex

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john_trenor said:
Hey Levex,

I wouldn't worry about it just yet. And, you shouldn't make any rash decisions based on one thing she did.

That said, I know it feels aggravating to not only have her cancel plans made days before, but also cancel them to hang out with some dude... and that dude happens to be her ex!

In most cases, I would say that a woman that does that crossed the line by a mile. However, if you've only gone out on a couple of dates, the relationship is still in the casual stages - you're still getting to know each other and she still has not figured the time she wants to spend with you into her day to day schedule. I'm saying that it takes just a bit more time for a woman to change their mindset about how she prioritizes her time when she first meets a guy.

In the worst case scenario, she likes you but is impulsively testing you (it's actually a good sign if you know how to react). My advice to you is to be a strong man this time around and give her the benefit of the doubt. Do not chase after her and do not scorn her for changing the plans on you. When you see her next, be confident and the best guy ever. Doing so will show her that you are stable, because she couldn't get a rise out of you, and that you're actually quite the catch, because you concentrate on the positive feeling of the moment rather than dwell on past bs.

If she does it something like this again. My advice is to calmly confront her and then break it off (that is very powerful). If she realizes her mistake, she will come after you.

Good luck my friend!
Thank you for a thoughtful response, unlike that one dipsh!t in the earlier post. Puts things in perspective.

edit: Nkognito, you're right, i didn't try to put it in her mouth on the 2nd date lol, i go by the vibes a girl gives me and i had a feeling if i tried anything sexual at that point i'd scare her off, we did kiss though obviously. If it was some skeezer ,i'd have her back in my house after couple drinks thats no problem, but it takes some girls a little longer to "warm up".
 

Nkognito

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Levex said:
edit: Nkognito, you're right, i didn't try to put it in her mouth on the 2nd date lol, i go by the vibes a girl gives me and i had a feeling if i tried anything sexual at that point i'd scare her off, we did kiss though obviously. If it was some skeezer ,i'd have her back in my house after couple drinks thats no problem, but it takes some girls a little longer to "warm up".
No doubt but you cannot label a girl a skeezer if she is willing to have sex on the first date or second because you are equally the same skeezer for going through with it. We are not exempt from our own actions. If we get it on with a girl and she does it on the first date then we're equally guilty of the labels.

I only pointed it out because girls are emotional and a few dates without any physical activity is not something to worry about. But had you got it on then there is something with that girl that did not click.

Quality9.99 said:
Dont sweat it dude,some guys here are just used to wh0res.
I'm 33, wait till you to take a step out in the world kiddo then report back :crackup:
 
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Levex

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Fair enough, was just making a point though.

Think i know what to do, thanks for responses.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Quality9.99

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I'm not trying to get all high and mighty cause I guess u have more experience but I'm saying not every girl likes to have sex on the 2nd date or w/e.Ultimetly it depends on the type of girl you are with.
 
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