"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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How to react to situations like this?

S

shandoli

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this kind of thing is bugging me....i m on my way to be a DJ..so obviously I dont give hot girls too much attention....

so today I m tlking to a guy friend....one of his very hot mates comes up and starts talking..i dont give her any attention basicaly....after about 30 seconds she says something like"I am not into hairy guys" to my guy friend...

looks at me and sas"sorry... if u r hairy"

I just completely look her inthe eye and not respond and basically not acknwledge her ****..haha
i completely turn my body away and start talking about random **** to my friend..haha

how shud u respond to this kinda ****!!
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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S

Smile

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Depends what you wanna say i guess, i mean, you could just say something like "i've never had any complaints" or "theres only one way you'll ever find that out". It really doesnt matter all that much as long as you can think of something to say in return.
 
I

InLawsHateMe

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Originally posted by shandoli
this kind of thing is bugging me....i m on my way to be a DJ..so obviously I dont give hot girls too much attention....

so today I m tlking to a guy friend....one of his very hot mates comes up and starts talking..i dont give her any attention basicaly....after about 30 seconds she says something like"I am not into hairy guys" to my guy friend...

looks at me and sas"sorry... if u r hairy"

I just completely look her inthe eye and not respond and basically not acknwledge her ****..haha
i completely turn my body away and start talking about random **** to my friend..haha

how shud u respond to this kinda ****!!
Click to expand...
:)

"Are you into hairy, salty balls?"

"Too bad.... I was going to offer you some bush."

"I'm not into hairy chics. Sorry if you are hairy."

"So I take it a bl0wj0bbyj0b is out of the question?"

"Are you into anal?"

"Hairy like animal, or hairy like my buddy here?"

"Women.. they don;t liek this, or that.. but they won't b*tch when we're licking their asses."

"DON'T KNOCK IT TILL YOU TRY IT HONEY!!" 8)

....just a few off the top of my head.
 
C

CyranoDeBergerac

Master Don Juan
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Personally, since she made such a presentation out of it, I would favor the theatrical approach demonstrated thus:


*comically exaggerating hurt and anguish* "Wait a minute you guys. Do you hear that? That's the sound of my heart being utterly crushed... How will I ever survive? *turning completely away and regaing full composure* I'm sorry (guy), what were you saying again?

There's also the caustic approach(with one eyebrow raised):

"Who was asking?"

And the Sarcastic/intellectual eletist approach:

"Hey (b1tch who's name I do not know), Copernicus called a minute ago, turns out the world does not revolve around you. *shake head in mock disbelief* Difficult to believe I know..."

I don't favor those last two in that situation because it could be construed as you licking your wounds, and how could a manly-masculine-man like you be wounded by such a snippet from a strumpet? Nah. Didn't think so either.Better just to laugh it off...

-CyranoDeBergerac
 
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