"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

How to overcome shortness?

MaxLove

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Hello fellow DJs! I am new to this site, and can consider myself a reforming AFC...

Long story short, one of my biggest problems is my physical shortness (5'5"). I am over it with my height a long time ago already. I did struggle with it when I was younger (26 now). Right now I am a man of many talents (piano, MMA, well spoken, intelligent, good looking, etc) and I know that I have a lot going for me (stable job too).

I have dated women fine, but they are all women shorter than me. That is not to say that there's a shortage of women less than my height (excuse the pun), but I realized that often time when I go out, taller women tend to ignore me. And sometimes, knowing that there's a large portion of women I am not qualified with diminishes my confidence.

I am trying to continue to improve my game, of course. I feel quite confident about myself, though I know that I can work on my body more. I only weight 135 (mostly because I am a fighter, and don't want to bulk up too much). And in the world of night clubs and bars, needless to say my physique doesn't quite pique women's interest.

What do you guys think I can work on? Anyone with similar experience to share?
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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Scaramouche

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Hi Max,
Well would you have bothered doing all that personality development if you were six foot six?....not just Men who are only a tad under average height with this problem....I am just less than six feet,quite powerfully built,smart dresser....eight years ago I travelled 200 miles round trip to meet a woman who I had corresponded with...I was silly enough to take her out to the best Restaurant in town,of course she ordered Lobster....Boring little Tvit left the Lobster on her plate (It was frozen)sulked for two hours as I extracted conversation like teeth...As we walked out,again I showed remarkable immaturity by asklng her how it went?"Oh No" she said drawing herself up to a majestic five feet in her mail order heels,"I only date tall Men"...Then with a toss of her peroxided hair she was off into the Sunset,in her beat up old Toyota....My main regret on reflection,was that I didn't grab an unused bread roll and whack the Lobster into a Sandwich for a snack on the drive home....Seriously Mate,try Mainland Chinese Women.
 

MatureDJ

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MaxLove said:
Hello fellow DJs! I am new to this site, and can consider myself a reforming AFC...

Long story short, one of my biggest problems is my physical shortness (5'5"

<snip>

I have dated women fine, but they are all women shorter than me. That is not to say that there's a shortage of women less than my height (excuse the pun), but I realized that often time when I go out, taller women tend to ignore me. And sometimes, knowing that there's a large portion of women I am not qualified with diminishes my confidence.

<snip>

I only weight 135 (mostly because I am a fighter, and don't want to bulk up too much). And in the world of night clubs and bars, needless to say my physique doesn't quite pique women's interest.

What do you guys think I can work on? Anyone with similar experience to share?
Yes, I am also 5'5", but with the powerlifter's physique that you don't have (I weigh 180# when solid, but sometimes up to 195# when I am back in the USA porking out on all that hormone ridden American food. :mad: )

I understand perfectly the feeling. The fact is that in a meat market environment, we are considered by taller women, or even shorter women who happen to be heightist, as invisible. It really is a lot like the way we view the chubbies that unfortunately we see all over the great USA. :mad:

There's not much that can be done other than keep sawing wood and find women who aren't heightist. Of course, in other countries, women cannot afford to be so picky, so there is less heightism.

There is the medical procedure of leg lengthening, but I really wouldn't recommend that!
 
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MatureDJ

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Scaramouche said:
Hi Max,
Well would you have bothered doing all that personality development if you were six foot six?....not just Men who are only a tad under average height with this problem....I am just less than six feet,quite powerfully built,smart dresser....eight years ago I travelled 200 miles round trip to meet a woman who I had corresponded with...I was silly enough to take her out to the best Restaurant in town,of course she ordered Lobster....Boring little Tvit left the Lobster on her plate (It was frozen)sulked for two hours as I extracted conversation like teeth...As we walked out,again I showed remarkable immaturity by asklng her how it went?"Oh No" she said drawing herself up to a majestic five feet in her mail order heels,"I only date tall Men"...Then with a toss of her peroxided hair she was off into the Sunset,in her beat up old Toyota....My main regret on reflection,was that I didn't grab an unused bread roll and whack the Lobster into a Sandwich for a snack on the drive home....Seriously Mate,try Mainland Chinese Women.
Geez, 6' is short? :mad: :mad: :mad:
 

Mr.Positive

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Max, when I read your post, I can tell you've got the right mindset on constant self-improvement and a man who's got his act together, with a great future ahead as well.

When it comes to height, it's best to not be concerned about it since there's nothing you can do to change it.

One thing each one of us can improve on however, is presence. I think very tall men have this naturally, just by pure size. For most of us (I am 5'10), who are average, a little more, maybe a little less, that presence is established through confidence, experience, testosterone, etc. I reckon as a fighter, you have more of that presence already than most guys.

At 5'5", statistically you are about average worldwide.

The best thing you can do, is instead of focusing on how height may be limiting you with *some* women, focus on going after what you want in women. Go for the smaller petite ones...we all like them better anyway. :up:

Whatever you do, don't be like some of the chumps who peacock their hair up, wear those tall shoes that ad height, etc. Be secure and proud of who you are and what you've accomplished in life.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Colossus

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Great advice from Mr. Positive.

Personally I'm around 6', but my dad is a shorter guy (5'6''), and he has never had a problem attracting women.

It sounds like you have a lot going on for yourself besides your physical attributes. You are what you are in that dept...no sense in hiding it, disguising it, or being ashamed of it. Wear it like a boss and own it every single day. No one can use it against you if you embrace it and keep developing yourself to the fullest.

It is true that women prefer taller men than themselves, but there are plenty of girls under 5'5". So I would say to maximize your success rate, go after girls who are your size or smaller.
 

MaxLove

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Thanks everyone for the inputs!

I know that a lot of that is what's in my head. Sure, some girls are heightists, and there's nothing I can do about it to change that. But most often than not, it's the insecurity I feel around taller women that cause me to lose my cool.

Meanwhile, I am planning to bulk to to 150 for the time being, and see how it works with my fighting. More than anything, I will have to cut back down to 125 to fight. But I will probably push my walk-around weight to 150. Some bulk will definitely make me less petite looking.

As for "presence", I definitely have that going. I do not feel any less than men taller than me. Once again, it is women with heightism that tend to overlook me. But you know what? I don't need women like that anyway!
 

Jitterbug

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If you're short, don't be skinny, cos then you'll just look tiny. Def don't want to make the girl feel huge (i.e fat). I'm a relatively short guy (5'7") but I'm a thick & muscular 195lb powerlifter and that makes girls feel small & protected. I've dated a 6'1" singer, and a fellow powerlifter (5'8", 210lb) is dating a 6" leggy blonde with a killer arse. The girls I've dated split fairly evenly between taller than me and shorter.

Don't hunt at night clubs or any place where it encourages people to be more superficial. Where girls can barely hear you talk, they'd have to revert to some basics to filter you out, and one of those is height, unfortunately. Game can't overcome "music" at 150dB+, sorry.

Learn to dress well that makes you appear taller. I wouldn't go crazy on those shoe lifts if I were you. A couple of inches at most is enough.

There are always a few chicks who take height seriously and will reject you for it, but for most, it's never as high a priority as they think. They may prefer a taller man, but when you're there face to face being your best self, that goes out of the window fast. That's one reason to avoid online dating btw.
 

PokerStar

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hahah dude im the same height as you and I always mack on taller chicks. who cares if you are short?

WE ARE ALL THE SAME HEIGHT LYING DOWN
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

Blackmm

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Easy solution, date Asian chicks. Most of the ones i bump into are around the 4'11-5'2 range and are usually hot as ****.
 
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