How to not OVER DO counter offers?

[spiegel549]

I just had my 4th date with this girl last night. We are already sleeping together, I slept over on the 3rd date and she made me breakfast etc.

I have really been playing it like the Alpha male with my A+ game of NOT being overly needy and keeping my mystery.

Since our date last night I can tell she is really into me. The only problem is I want to avoid the dreaded "AFC MOVE" were I want to start seeing her more and more. I need to continue seeing her at the pace I have been seeing it, and give her time to miss me.

So we had just dinner last night, and towards the end she invited me over Friday to swim and watch movies etc, but did mention that she might have to travel to her sisters for the weekend to help her with some work.

So she texted me today thanks again for last last night I had a great time, friday we will have a lot of fun, but I might have to go to my sisters she keeps telling me she needs me.

Now the old AFC me would go "Well how about Thursday?" even though I am free both today and thursday she doesn't need to know that.

Am I better off just playing it like "It would be nice to see you Friday but if you have to help your sister we can get together after the weekend."

The Main Question

Am I always better off (especially in the early stages of dating) just pushing the "dates" further back then trying to jam them in?

At the end of the day I rather come off as "no big deal" then "omg I need to see you!" correcto?

 

[pdx1138]

"It would be nice to see you Friday but if you have to help your sister we can get together after the weekend."

^^Further is what I would do.

Is this the same one that was flaking a lot in the beginning?

 

[spiegel549]

"It would be nice to see you Friday but if you have to help your sister we can get together after the weekend."

^^Further is what I would do.

Is this the same one that was flaking a lot in the beginning?

Yup this is the one that flaked in the start and called me a few days later and when I set her straight since then she has pulled a 180 the past 3 dates and has been very responsive and showing very high interest.

I know its because I took the best advice from this site and actually USED IT that she is so responsive now. I am not acting like a "AFC Biotch."

I thought about it and that above text message sounded too damn AFC.

I responded with "Your welcome i'll give ya a ring tomorrow night and we can see whats up." Short & Simple.

Now when I call, is it AFC to say "Maybe we can get together for a little bit before you leave for the weekend?" Or should I just stick with "No problem, lets get together after the weekend."

??

 

[pdx1138]

error on the side of NOT seeing her or making plans with her.

let her make the offer.

it's always better to let them chase you / make plans at this point.

 

[isperatus]

error on the side of NOT seeing her or making plans with her.

let her make the offer.

it's always better to let them chase you / make plans at this point.

forgot abt the quotes there. of course that i understood that they did intentionally, and will do if given the chance...

I write here because it's easier for me to understand what i do, and i have different opinions to think about. Also i can re-read things which helps.

One of my failures from today: I went with one of my friends to drink a beer. We're usually funny and laugh a lot and went to this bar several times.

In one of the days i spoke with the waitress and made a couple of jokes.
Today i noticed that she was always smiling and some other ioi's. So i noticed a pink watch on her hand that she was sticking in my face when she brought us drinks. I asked her about the watch and she actually took it off and gave it to me. I told a joke that it was heavy and she'll grow muscle. That went really well...

this is where i blow it: she gets the drinks and i totally awkwardly tell her to stop and i grab her hand and touch the watch laughing. it was embarrassing afterwards, totally embarrassing... got me down and my friend was not very helpful, got me even lower, telling me afterwards that the approach was very very wrong... it took me several girls to chat to over fb to get myself up again...

damn... i suck big time... no confidence at all.

 

[spiegel549]

forgot abt the quotes there. of course that i understood that they did intentionally, and will do if given the chance...

I write here because it's easier for me to understand what i do, and i have different opinions to think about. Also i can re-read things which helps.

One of my failures from today: I went with one of my friends to drink a beer. We're usually funny and laugh a lot and went to this bar several times.

In one of the days i spoke with the waitress and made a couple of jokes.
Today i noticed that she was always smiling and some other ioi's. So i noticed a pink watch on her hand that she was sticking in my face when she brought us drinks. I asked her about the watch and she actually took it off and gave it to me. I told a joke that it was heavy and she'll grow muscle. That went really well...

this is where i blow it: she gets the drinks and i totally awkwardly tell her to stop and i grab her hand and touch the watch laughing. it was embarrassing afterwards, totally embarrassing... got me down and my friend was not very helpful, got me even lower, telling me afterwards that the approach was very very wrong... it took me several girls to chat to over fb to get myself up again...

damn... i suck big time... no confidence at all.

Bro....how is that anyway in response to my thread.

Do what I did. Read, read, read, read, read this site. Until you stop doing your old **** that doesn't work and start doing **** that does work.

 

[Kbomb]

I just had my 4th date with this girl last night. We are already sleeping together, I slept over on the 3rd date and she made me breakfast etc.

I have really been playing it like the Alpha male with my A+ game of NOT being overly needy and keeping my mystery.

Since our date last night I can tell she is really into me. The only problem is I want to avoid the dreaded "AFC MOVE" were I want to start seeing her more and more. I need to continue seeing her at the pace I have been seeing it, and give her time to miss me.

So we had just dinner last night, and towards the end she invited me over Friday to swim and watch movies etc, but did mention that she might have to travel to her sisters for the weekend to help her with some work.

So she texted me today thanks again for last last night I had a great time, friday we will have a lot of fun, but I might have to go to my sisters she keeps telling me she needs me.

Now the old AFC me would go "Well how about Thursday?" even though I am free both today and thursday she doesn't need to know that.

Am I better off just playing it like "It would be nice to see you Friday but if you have to help your sister we can get together after the weekend."

The Main Question

Am I always better off (especially in the early stages of dating) just pushing the "dates" further back then trying to jam them in?

At the end of the day I rather come off as "no big deal" then "omg I need to see you!" correcto?

I think its a mild **** test. You should always be busy if she is making iffy plans. Just be like Friday is no good for me. Well get together some other time, and next time i want pancakes.

 

[spiegel549]

This forum needs to be introduced to the concept of rape...why are girls sleeping over and not getting fvcked?

Very good...the second sentence of my thread says "we are already sleeping together." aka ****ing.

 

[Trump]

So we had just dinner last night, and towards the end she invited me over Friday to swim and watch movies etc, but did mention that she might have to travel to her sisters for the weekend to help her with some work.

So she texted me today thanks again for last last night I had a great time, friday we will have a lot of fun, but I might have to go to my sisters she keeps telling me she needs me.

Now the old AFC me would go "Well how about Thursday?" even though I am free both today and thursday she doesn't need to know that.

Am I better off just playing it like "It would be nice to see you Friday but if you have to help your sister we can get together after the weekend."

Thats too much, don't give her so much credit. "It was nice too see you, perhaps after..."

Just say "OK let me know about Friday by tomorrow night. Hope your sister is OK."