how to not be competitive?

[Heretolearn]

Hey guys,


Just wondering, I notice I do not get that close/along with well guys who could be seen as a threat in a sense.

Just wondering how I can improve this part of me. *I have become really good friends with some of these 'types' later but initially it is like sizing people up/territory and all that/feeling threatened a bit I guess too that they will steal some of my thunder.

So how can I improve this in myself please?

 

[( . )( . )]

So how can I improve this in myself please?

Be better than them at everything, and if you cant then most things. They cant possibly steal your thunder then can they?

Outdoing your fellow man is part and parcel of being a man.
You should be embracing the challenge other guys bring, not seeing them as guys you "dont get along with".

 

[squirrels]

When you compete, compete with nothing to prove.

If you're trying to "prove" something, it means you don't believe it yourself.

Ask yourself WHY you dont' believe it. Fix that underlying cause. Everything else falls into place.

 

[SharpGame]

There's nothing wrong with being competitive. It's the attitude you have while doing it that's going to determine whether you win or lose friends.

What has helped me is to detach myself emotionally from the outcome throughout the whole process of whatever competitive thing it is I'm doing. When it's over, anyone looking at you should not be able to tell whether you won or lost.

This is for two reasons. One is that over celebrating or getting too upset during the game (and this doesn't only apply to sports) will distract you from achieving your goal. The other reason is you don't want to look like a sore loser or a show-off.

 

[Heretolearn]

Great points, so I can be competitive but just have to adjust my mindset. Any more tips?

I think overcoming a scarcity mentality would help also.

 

[COD]

PRACTICLE REALISTIC ADVICE............competition despite what everyone claims.....BRINGS OUT THE WORST IN PEOPLE.

I would say befriend your competition.........giving them a high five, asking them for advice, use them as a wing, this temporary alliance will ultimately increase your DHV spikes. When the timing is right, inject the swoop approach when they least expect it.

How do u feel when someone hones in on your target. The key is to allow this attempt initially.....then say "She aint that easy dude", your going to have to step it up a little to get a chic like this..........take her arm throw it around you and exude coolness. U could also say not bad opener dude but I would have said........(insert line).........I'll give you E for effort though.

Competition is everywhere and the truth is there is always going to be someone cuter, hotter, bigger muscles, etc. Your game plan is to circumvent the competition.......and theres a ton of ways to do that. Being better is one but the game is getting tighter each day.

some examples: cant be 'em join them, get there first, body block their personal space, act as if she is yours.......use words like honey, sweety, etc, isolate quickly, pre-empted strike........."HEY WATCH THIS GUY TRY TO HIT ON YOU......he thinks he's the mack, lets listen to his cheesy line",etc

Those are but a few..........so many more. Bottom line you gotta be cool & interesting first before the target feels your interest. Blowing out the competition takes a long time to do and some guys take offence and want to fight.....unless you work with them.

 

[azanon]

Great points, so I can be competitive but just have to adjust my mindset. Any more tips?

I think overcoming a scarcity mentality would help also.

By being as prepared as you can be (such as learning here), and by being the very best you can be. When you're living life at a maximum, there's no regrets. You're doing everything you can with what you've got, right?

It's not as if you're competing for a scare resource. We have pvssy everywhere here, not sure about where you live.

In tennis, I ultimately compete with myself, not other people. I know I never never beat Roger Federer, but I can certainly work to become a 4.0 player when I'm a 3.5 player today. And I'm doing that.