How to love yourself

[Anargyros]

I wish I could love myself as I'm capable of loving someone else.

And for the non-natural alphas here, it should have been a process of learning

Can you share some advice?

 

[jurry]

Accept the situation and stop being so self critical. There is no you, despite what the story inside your mind would say. It really, truly does not matter. The self is an illusion perpetuated by misguided mental states and an equally delusional society.

There is nothing out there to get or complete you. So just chill and realize you are one with every "thing" else, just floating along on this cosmic journey together.

 

[BraddH]

Jurry, you are truly an enlightened person. I am glad to have found other sources of light. The more we have this source of light, the bigger chance we have of becoming a truly beautiful oneness. A world full of beauty and without misery.

For OP, please see that the world as such, is sick. It is never healthy, because to be healthy is to be present and the whole world is constantly being in the future and in the past thinking either how can I become that or why didn't I become that - wasting his whole life like this.

To be presents means accepting everything that you are. And only then is happiness and love available to you. Otherwise you are just living in the dreams of nightmares. Just watch the world. The so called "business" world where soon the Third World War is about to begin. Where the so called humanity is going to kill themselves.

The only path to happiness, love and loving yourself is through presents. Live in the moment; I repeat, don't miss the present by constantly thinking about either the past or the future. Your whole life will be wasted. Only present lives. Past is dead and future hasn't born. And both aren't alive.

 

[PeasantPlayer]

Any tips on dispelling the "you" and "I" I been meditating, and I kind of get it, but then I don't....

 

[Skyline]

I wish I could love myself as I'm capable of loving someone else.

And for the non-natural alphas here, it should have been a process of learning

Can you share some advice?

What's with all of these "love" threads?

You cannot "love" someone else in a relationship context. It does not work. How you maintain your frame and the amount of game you have will ALWAYS determine her interest. Not a couple of meaningless words. The second you stop doing what's attractive to her, then she and her "love" for you will be gone. This was probably the biggest realization that I had when I came to this site.

However you can love yourself, I don't even like using the word "love" anymore. You can care deeply for yourself. The reason why you can "love" someone else but not yourself is because you're counting on THEM to make you feel better and happy. You're putting your happiness in their hands, which is bad. "I'll make you feel like a queen if you make me feel like a king!" Just screams of co dependency. Women don't even work like that, you give them an inch and they WILL go a mile- if you let them.

Read the DJ Bible. It's a stickied post in almost every major discussion board.

 

[stephenbaldwin]

Go to the gym. Travel abroad. Do something that you've always wanted to but were too afraid to try. You need to build confidence by crossing off personal goals, so that understand that you are a worthwhile person.

 

[Anargyros]

You cannot "love" someone else in a relationship context. It does not work. How you maintain your frame and the amount of game you have will ALWAYS determine her interest. Not a couple of meaningless words. The second you stop doing what's attractive to her, then she and her "love" for you will be gone. This was probably the biggest realization that I had when I came to this site.

That's some depressing stuff. I'll take the blue pill on this one. Because yeah, saying "I love you" is useless, but actually loving someone with ACTIONS.. well, I'd appreciate that, maybe some women does as well

 

[Meisterman]

I wish I could love myself as I'm capable of loving someone else.

And for the non-natural alphas here, it should have been a process of learning

Can you share some advice?

Think of your confidence as a compilation of your previous beliefs, actions, attitudes, and behaviors. Whenever you change this there will still be left over momentum from the previous behaviors that will carry over for some time. Sort of like a rock rolling down a hill that isn't being pushed by anyone but is slowly using up the rest of its energy before it comes to a stop. So what do I mean by this?

Act. Act without seeing the results, or believing it will work, or becoming dependent on the outcome. Simply do the things the person you want to be would do. Even if you're faking it. Because eventually you WILL become that person. Go through the motions of it and you will start to live, feel, and breath as that new person more and more as your old patterns have worn themselves out and serve no purpose other than to show you how to use them to better yourself and create better, new habits.

So do the things the person you want to be would do. Don't be afraid to say no, stick up for yourself, and know that you're happiness is more important than anyone and any one girl. And most importantly allow yourself to fvck up, time and time again, because it's gonna happen. Just remember....you aren't the person who made those mistakes. You are the person who LEARNED from those mistakes.