How to initiate physical contact @ work?

[DaftTHUNK]

Background:

There's a girl I exchanged #'s with at a bar recently and it turns out we work in the same building (for different companies). I've had lunch w/ her twice and both times it's a very awkward goodbye as I kind of feel like since we're in an office building around random people I'm not in a good position to kiss her or even hug her.

So it's a horribly tense goodbye as we get into separate elevators...anyone had a similar experience? I've never dated a girl that I've had to be around at work before so it's new territory for me.

 

[iqqi]

You could use the inability to touch each other as a tool to elevate desire. Touch with your eyes!

 

[Latinoman]

You could use the inability to touch each other as a tool to elevate desire. Touch with your eyes!

Yeah...get the poor bastard labelled as the "creepy" person in the office (like this dude that work in mine in which EVERYBODY consider "creepy" and is a look away from getting a sexual harrassment sent his way). Bad advice...VERY bad advice. But then again, you work with a 21 year old slut and you both are into sleeping around at work...(which makes me wonder what kind of work you are doing).

 

[iqqi]

He said they exchanged #'s and they are seeing each other (lunch dates). She isn't a stranger. He wants to hug or kiss her, but can't.

 

[My Name is Nobody]

Whatever you do don't go AFC over a girl at work. I did and it turned out horrible.

BUT it was good for me because I went out and met a new woman who is awesome, much better than work chic. So play your cards right buddy!

 

[DaftTHUNK]

LOL @ Latinoman's response. Yeah it's just sort of casual stuff but it's going to be at least until the weekend after this before we hang out outside of work where there's no boundaries. Until then, after we eat there's some awkward exchange before parting like "Umm I guess I'll email/text you later" or something to that effect. But the tension is definitely there to the point where if it was outside of work it would no doubt turn physical.

Essentially, I'm trying to figure out a less awkward parting due to the fact that I have no idea what the generally-accepted rules for office behavior are in situations like this.

 

[iqqi]

I think kissing on the cheek is acceptable to onlookers, be prim about it, in a humourous way.

 

[Latinoman]

I think kissing on the cheek is acceptable to onlookers, be prim about it, in a humourous way.

This is a clear indication of FAULTY and STUPID advice.

That advice might work in a place like McDonald or Chilis or Subway. But NOT knowing the original poster's age...her age...place of work...and positions at work...the advice is RIDICULOUS. For all we know, the dude is 55 and she is 30 and both work in Corporate America.

Iqqi...let the MATURE Men give the advice.

 

[DaftTHUNK]

We're both under 30, but in a corporate office with mostly older people. Appreciating all the feedback, thanks guys...

 

[iqqi]

But some of you are SO uptight.

And I disagree that all of you are MATURE.

I am usually the first one to say that kino is kind of creepy.

I am assuming the OP and his girl are close in age. Kissing on the cheek is often a way to say hello and goodbye, in many cultures, and is nowhere near taboo. It is something friends do.

 

[wjh]

Work + Women = High Probability of Disaster

 

[iqqi]

Work + Women = High Probability of Disaster

When I first replied I was going to say this, however they don't work for the SAME company, just in the same building.

Its like if you worked in the mall. As long as you worked at Journeys, she could work at Sears, right?

 

[wjh]

When I first replied I was going to say this, however they don't work for the SAME company, just in the same building.

Its like if you worked in the mall. As long as you worked at Journeys, she could work at Sears, right?

You're right thanks for the correction snuggle-buns. :rockon:

 

[reset]

There should be a poll here.

"Did dating a co-worker turn out the way you thought it would?"

A. Yes.
B. No. I used to like my job.

 

[Latinoman]

But some of you are SO uptight.

And I disagree that all of you are MATURE.

I am usually the first one to say that kino is kind of creepy.

I am assuming the OP and his girl are close in age. Kissing on the cheek is often a way to say hello and goodbye, in many cultures, and is nowhere near taboo. It is something friends do.

I am latino and in my culture, we kiss the female friends on the cheek. However, I am also SENIOR staff in my office (I report directly to the top guy) and I used to recruit in the past and I can tell you (or anyone) what is frowned at and what is acceptable. These two work TOGETHER. They are PEERS. I NEVER kiss my female friends in my office. In fact, I act very professionally and treat them as PEERS.

If both of them like each other and decide to get involved…I STRONGLY suggest they keep it among themselves and that they show discretion. I STRONGLY suggest that.

 

[wjh]

You're Latino Latinoman?!

 

[iqqi]

I am latino and in my culture, we kiss the female friends on the cheek. However, I am also SENIOR staff in my office (I report directly to the top guy) and I used to recruit in the past and I can tell you (or anyone) what is frowned at and what is acceptable. These two work TOGETHER. They are PEERS. I NEVER kiss my female friends in my office. In fact, I act very professionally and treat them as PEERS.

If both of them like each other and decide to get involved…I STRONGLY suggest they keep it among themselves and that they show discretion. I STRONGLY suggest that.

They DON'T work together.

 

[Latinoman]

They DON'T work together.

That's not the point. I rather play it safe with my advice. The issue here is that I don't know the environment of his office. I don't know how is his company and the people that work there. The same applies for her. We don't know her history or anything about her. Why put her in a situation in which people can gossip at her office?

Advice cannot be given like blanket statements. A LOT of things have to be considered. I know how it is as I have seen people characters assasinated in the work environment for doing LESS.

 

[iqqi]

That's not the point. I rather play it safe with my advice. The issue here is that I don't know the environment of his office. I don't know how is his company and the people that work there. The same applies for her. We don't know her history or anything about her. Why put her in a situation in which people can gossip at her office?

Advice cannot be given like blanket statements. A LOT of things have to be considered. I know how it is as I have seen people characters assasinated in the work environment for doing LESS.

Sound like he got two choices. Play it safe, or kiss her on the cheek. Or caress her with his soulful eyes.

 

[DaftTHUNK]

I'll probably play it safe until we can get together outside of work...no use in potentially screwing things up since I'm confident I can seal the deal within another week's time. Thanks fellas.