The problem with men is that we do not know how to handle the loss of loved ones. Through out the entire human history, it has been the job of a man to provide for his family. He is the fighter, provider, father, son… sometimes a mad wizard, who will defend his family against beasts – from grizzly bears to creepy crawlies. Fight wars and defend his loved ones from other men.
Women are used to losing their men folk due to death by wars, hunting etc. They are the gatherers who look after the young uns and make the home comfortable, etc. When a man is lost, they will support each other, make a plan and accept it as destiny.
How many women live longer than men? They are not the stronger sex at all. They just have developed better survival skills – with the help of men.
The situation has now been reversed. In this modern society, it is acceptable, even encouraged to leave a man if he doesn’t live up to her inflated ideals.
Men are not used to losing their women and children other than death, but some b!tch who steals their kids, house, money and possessions – simple because she is ‘entitled’ to do so and doesn’t “love” him any more.
The divorce laws were initiated to protect women from abusive husbands who beat them, raped their own children, cheated, abused alcohol, etc…But those loving fathers who lost all because their wives cheated?
Many men self destruct because they cannot suffer the loss of kin due to factors other than death.
• Your wife is still alive and fvcking your best friend.
• She has sole custody and will **** block you in every way so that you cannot see your kids.
• She has stolen half your money, property, pride, etc.
• Not satisfied with that, since you have improved yourself and are going out with younger and hotter chicks than het – she will entice her lovers to beat you up.
I have seen my brother in law and a friend drink themselves to death after their divorces. Have been through the hell of depression myself – at one time wanted to throw myself out of the window.
According to recent studies, men are two and a half times more likely to commit suicide after divorce as compared to women. These studies have put an end to the famous mistaken belief that women suffer more after divorce.
Men tend to form friendships wherein they can get to “hang out” with their friends but not talk about their deep inner feelings. Since men are not able to voice out their bitterness and hurt felt during the divorce, they tend to feel a void in their lives. In fact, it is common for men to seclude themselves from their friends because they do not even know how to have fun with their friends when their minds weigh so heavily with emotional baggage related to divorce.
Men tend to feel more shattered than women after the divorce because in most of the divorce cases involving children, the custody of the children is awarded to the mother. Therefore, all of a sudden, men find themselves to be a mere visitor in their child’s life, which can be a very tough emotion to deal with.
Children tend to act as stress busters during the divorce process because they become a source of love and support after divorce. While custodial mothers are able to reap the rewards of this love and affection and cope with divorce easily, non-custodial fathers tend to feel very lonely because they not only lose their status of being a husband but also of being a father.
It is common for men to blame themselves after the divorce because they feel that divorce could have been averted if they had been more sensitive to their troubled marriage. Truth is, no matter how much a wife complains about problems or concerns in a marriage, husbands mostly never understand the importance of these issues. For that reason, when wives file for a divorce, most husbands are in state of shock. When men are unable to deal with their feelings of guilt, bitterness, loneliness, and anger, suicide seems to be the only alternative.
Survival Strategies for Men to Avoid Suicidal Tendencies
1. Communicate
It is extremely important for men to talk about their feelings and concerns to someone that they can trust and depend on. Since many men do not know how to talk about their innermost feelings to their male friends, it might help if you seek help of a female friend or relative. Often, gaining insights to problems from a female perspective can be of huge help during such a tough time.
If you feel that there is no one you can turn to, seek professional help. Professional therapists will not only help you to overcome your fears and problems but will also help you find solutions to these issues and fears. It is important to remember that your inner healing phase will not start unless you let out the bitterness, sadness, or frustration associated with divorce.
2. Join a Divorce Support Group
Joining a divorce support group is a good way to understand that you are not the only one in this tough situation. There are some divorce groups that specifically cater to the needs of divorced men. Joining these groups is a good way to find out what tools and strategies others have used to cope with the stress and problems related to divorce.
At the time it may seem that it is the best solution, but its not. In South Africa unfortunately, with some cultures, it is not unusual for men to wipe out the entire family before killing themselves. How can they kill the innocent children that they supposed to love, is beyond my comprehension.
Believe me, NO woman is worth killing yourself or getting yourself into jail getting reamed for the rest of your life and if you follow my guide lines, you will survive this demanding period.
Women are used to losing their men folk due to death by wars, hunting etc. They are the gatherers who look after the young uns and make the home comfortable, etc. When a man is lost, they will support each other, make a plan and accept it as destiny.
How many women live longer than men? They are not the stronger sex at all. They just have developed better survival skills – with the help of men.
The situation has now been reversed. In this modern society, it is acceptable, even encouraged to leave a man if he doesn’t live up to her inflated ideals.
Men are not used to losing their women and children other than death, but some b!tch who steals their kids, house, money and possessions – simple because she is ‘entitled’ to do so and doesn’t “love” him any more.
The divorce laws were initiated to protect women from abusive husbands who beat them, raped their own children, cheated, abused alcohol, etc…But those loving fathers who lost all because their wives cheated?
Many men self destruct because they cannot suffer the loss of kin due to factors other than death.
• Your wife is still alive and fvcking your best friend.
• She has sole custody and will **** block you in every way so that you cannot see your kids.
• She has stolen half your money, property, pride, etc.
• Not satisfied with that, since you have improved yourself and are going out with younger and hotter chicks than het – she will entice her lovers to beat you up.
I have seen my brother in law and a friend drink themselves to death after their divorces. Have been through the hell of depression myself – at one time wanted to throw myself out of the window.
According to recent studies, men are two and a half times more likely to commit suicide after divorce as compared to women. These studies have put an end to the famous mistaken belief that women suffer more after divorce.
Men tend to form friendships wherein they can get to “hang out” with their friends but not talk about their deep inner feelings. Since men are not able to voice out their bitterness and hurt felt during the divorce, they tend to feel a void in their lives. In fact, it is common for men to seclude themselves from their friends because they do not even know how to have fun with their friends when their minds weigh so heavily with emotional baggage related to divorce.
Men tend to feel more shattered than women after the divorce because in most of the divorce cases involving children, the custody of the children is awarded to the mother. Therefore, all of a sudden, men find themselves to be a mere visitor in their child’s life, which can be a very tough emotion to deal with.
Children tend to act as stress busters during the divorce process because they become a source of love and support after divorce. While custodial mothers are able to reap the rewards of this love and affection and cope with divorce easily, non-custodial fathers tend to feel very lonely because they not only lose their status of being a husband but also of being a father.
It is common for men to blame themselves after the divorce because they feel that divorce could have been averted if they had been more sensitive to their troubled marriage. Truth is, no matter how much a wife complains about problems or concerns in a marriage, husbands mostly never understand the importance of these issues. For that reason, when wives file for a divorce, most husbands are in state of shock. When men are unable to deal with their feelings of guilt, bitterness, loneliness, and anger, suicide seems to be the only alternative.
Survival Strategies for Men to Avoid Suicidal Tendencies
1. Communicate
It is extremely important for men to talk about their feelings and concerns to someone that they can trust and depend on. Since many men do not know how to talk about their innermost feelings to their male friends, it might help if you seek help of a female friend or relative. Often, gaining insights to problems from a female perspective can be of huge help during such a tough time.
If you feel that there is no one you can turn to, seek professional help. Professional therapists will not only help you to overcome your fears and problems but will also help you find solutions to these issues and fears. It is important to remember that your inner healing phase will not start unless you let out the bitterness, sadness, or frustration associated with divorce.
2. Join a Divorce Support Group
Joining a divorce support group is a good way to understand that you are not the only one in this tough situation. There are some divorce groups that specifically cater to the needs of divorced men. Joining these groups is a good way to find out what tools and strategies others have used to cope with the stress and problems related to divorce.
At the time it may seem that it is the best solution, but its not. In South Africa unfortunately, with some cultures, it is not unusual for men to wipe out the entire family before killing themselves. How can they kill the innocent children that they supposed to love, is beyond my comprehension.
Believe me, NO woman is worth killing yourself or getting yourself into jail getting reamed for the rest of your life and if you follow my guide lines, you will survive this demanding period.
