How do you get that not caring feeling back? You know the one where you really don't care when u approach a girl, whether or not u get rejected and you'll move on to the next?
This happened about a year ago where i was in college. a girl in my class who kinda sleeps around was talking to some freshman, she's was a sophmore but 21 at the time. while hooking up with him she started to talk to me. i kinda gave her the interested/desperate feeling but she didn't care. I'm probably a afc/ aspiring dj. I'd say my looks and physical appearance is around 8.5+. I have no problem sparking humorous conversations with girls as long as it lands on my lap or happens out of coincidence(dunno if that is the same thing). Throughout my whole life i've had no problem having girls approach me or find out that i was hot/cute but i would always scare the **** out of them once they saw the needy side of me. im a senoir now so picking up where i left off junior year in college i was kinda sick of being alone. I decided to meet up with the girl at the club. none of my boys wanted to go and i knew practically no one there and it was kinda a college organization hang out thing with random friends. I go by myself all desperate and at the door meet a friend of mine that gets me in. i get in and see the girl dancing/ hookin up with another guy. kinda pissed/not caring since im not really interested in her but looking for affection kinda feeling. i go buy my boi a shot and then drink a beer and chill. i go outside kinda just not caring about anything and chilling and a girl a planned on talking to, walks by and smiles. i say hi and continue drinking. i bump into a HS friend and talk to her and her bf a lil then go back inside. The ***** girl see's me and i say high and get a hug then i buy her a drink. she was already wasted but i guess didn't want to refuse a drink from me since i stood her up a few times already. she takes the shot and hits the bathroom asap and is out for the night. the other cute girl walks by again in the club and i see her. she is being followed by like 3-4 stalkerish guys underclassmen. she was a sophmore at the time too. i thought about talking to her but walked away since she was being smothered and didn't want to come off as one of them. bought myself another beer and went out for a smoke. As i'm smoking im kinda pissed off that my plan backfired. the ***** was passed out and im all alone at a sausage fest party and don't know many ppl and have no boyz around me. i get fed up, and start thinkin im better than those stalkerz. taller/older/bigger/better looking and i start to think to myself "**** it, ima talk to her. if she rejects me, who the **** cares. better atleast tried than standing here. not like my life will change at all if she rejects me." I go over, and say "Hey i've seen you around before but i don't think we've ever formally met. My names AAAgent." cute girl "my names cute girl" then we chatted for about 30 seconds about school, class year, then i asked "i'm heading over to the bar, you want a drink?" cute girl "No, that's okay i don't drink." i thought to myself ***** alright, **** u too then. then i said "alright then, it was nice talking to you. i'll see you around." then i walked away. we ended up dating for about a year until november. while i was dating her the other girl went crazy over me since her last bf was stuck on this cute girl before ***** went out with him. plus i hooked up with this other girl that liked me. it was all going good until i found out she had mental issues and after we broke up my sister a nurse thought she might have BPD. Turns out she matched all the symptoms. really really verbally/emotionally/physically abusive. mad spending problems. 4 days after we broke up she found a new bf but still kept calling me and then slept with him within the first week. its been about a month and a half since we've been together. i've cut off all communication for 2 weeks now. she broke up with him and tried to come back to me only to mess with my head but i've cut her out completely. i have a real bad rep as of now because of her at my school but i don't really care. im slowly getting over her and getting my life back together. i mainly joined this forum for one of the bpd threads but it closed after my first post.
What i'm mainly asking is, how do i get that "I don't give a ****" type of attitude, i don't have it anymore and that was the only time i've ever experienced that feeling and used it to my advantage. That was the first girl i've ever slept with or really don't anything with besides kissing.
im generally a nice guy but girls always think of my as the player/******* type personality i guess because of my coldness and frankness with people and my looks.
i've read almost all of the dj bible. and im very lucky to have a dj as a bestfriend. he's helped me get over the situation im in and also helped me with a few hookups in the past but its my afc personality that usually loses me the girl.
AAAgent
This happened about a year ago where i was in college. a girl in my class who kinda sleeps around was talking to some freshman, she's was a sophmore but 21 at the time. while hooking up with him she started to talk to me. i kinda gave her the interested/desperate feeling but she didn't care. I'm probably a afc/ aspiring dj. I'd say my looks and physical appearance is around 8.5+. I have no problem sparking humorous conversations with girls as long as it lands on my lap or happens out of coincidence(dunno if that is the same thing). Throughout my whole life i've had no problem having girls approach me or find out that i was hot/cute but i would always scare the **** out of them once they saw the needy side of me. im a senoir now so picking up where i left off junior year in college i was kinda sick of being alone. I decided to meet up with the girl at the club. none of my boys wanted to go and i knew practically no one there and it was kinda a college organization hang out thing with random friends. I go by myself all desperate and at the door meet a friend of mine that gets me in. i get in and see the girl dancing/ hookin up with another guy. kinda pissed/not caring since im not really interested in her but looking for affection kinda feeling. i go buy my boi a shot and then drink a beer and chill. i go outside kinda just not caring about anything and chilling and a girl a planned on talking to, walks by and smiles. i say hi and continue drinking. i bump into a HS friend and talk to her and her bf a lil then go back inside. The ***** girl see's me and i say high and get a hug then i buy her a drink. she was already wasted but i guess didn't want to refuse a drink from me since i stood her up a few times already. she takes the shot and hits the bathroom asap and is out for the night. the other cute girl walks by again in the club and i see her. she is being followed by like 3-4 stalkerish guys underclassmen. she was a sophmore at the time too. i thought about talking to her but walked away since she was being smothered and didn't want to come off as one of them. bought myself another beer and went out for a smoke. As i'm smoking im kinda pissed off that my plan backfired. the ***** was passed out and im all alone at a sausage fest party and don't know many ppl and have no boyz around me. i get fed up, and start thinkin im better than those stalkerz. taller/older/bigger/better looking and i start to think to myself "**** it, ima talk to her. if she rejects me, who the **** cares. better atleast tried than standing here. not like my life will change at all if she rejects me." I go over, and say "Hey i've seen you around before but i don't think we've ever formally met. My names AAAgent." cute girl "my names cute girl" then we chatted for about 30 seconds about school, class year, then i asked "i'm heading over to the bar, you want a drink?" cute girl "No, that's okay i don't drink." i thought to myself ***** alright, **** u too then. then i said "alright then, it was nice talking to you. i'll see you around." then i walked away. we ended up dating for about a year until november. while i was dating her the other girl went crazy over me since her last bf was stuck on this cute girl before ***** went out with him. plus i hooked up with this other girl that liked me. it was all going good until i found out she had mental issues and after we broke up my sister a nurse thought she might have BPD. Turns out she matched all the symptoms. really really verbally/emotionally/physically abusive. mad spending problems. 4 days after we broke up she found a new bf but still kept calling me and then slept with him within the first week. its been about a month and a half since we've been together. i've cut off all communication for 2 weeks now. she broke up with him and tried to come back to me only to mess with my head but i've cut her out completely. i have a real bad rep as of now because of her at my school but i don't really care. im slowly getting over her and getting my life back together. i mainly joined this forum for one of the bpd threads but it closed after my first post.
What i'm mainly asking is, how do i get that "I don't give a ****" type of attitude, i don't have it anymore and that was the only time i've ever experienced that feeling and used it to my advantage. That was the first girl i've ever slept with or really don't anything with besides kissing.
im generally a nice guy but girls always think of my as the player/******* type personality i guess because of my coldness and frankness with people and my looks.
i've read almost all of the dj bible. and im very lucky to have a dj as a bestfriend. he's helped me get over the situation im in and also helped me with a few hookups in the past but its my afc personality that usually loses me the girl.
AAAgent