"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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how to get over that feeling of having missed out in life

OddManOut85

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ok.so as i sit here,i have alot on my mind.i just turned 21,and i feel like nothing is going for me.for various reasons.your probably thinking your 21,you should be out having the time of your life.well,im not.i think it is cause i cant look forward.im caught up in looking into the past too much because it feels like nothing has moved on or progressed for me.like im stuck,im trapped.and i have been feeling this way for quite a long time now.since i was 16.since then,i havent done much to improve myself.havent improved my confidence,my game,etc.

no.just moped around.and wallowed in self pitty.not good to do is it? so yeah it happened when i was 16,i got depressed.im not as depressed as i was,but i feel kinda hopeless.like all this time has gone bye,and i havent been taking advantage of it.like i missed out on,not just well chicks,but life in general.

i see everyone around me and it seems like theyve got it all so good.there in school,succeeding on in life,chicks like them,theyve got there great group of freinds,which i have some close freinds,but i have always felt like my social networking could be larger.like i wasnt,and i know this sounds cheesy,that popular in high school,which was a social nightmare for me,ill leave it at that.and you would think,well hey college,but no.cant go to college.cause i havent passed certain educational requirements in order to graduate.

so thats like for 2 years now i have had to put my life on hold.now with women,well,i am what you would call a late bloomer.was never good at talking with girls,kinda developed crushes,and all that.pretty much had my first everything last year,in the 19 to almost 20 period.so you see where i am in terms of that.they were all met from online.and had to go through a few frogs till i found my princess,but she left me,acted too clingy and needy a bit,put myself down,and like seeked validation.ok enough about that.im no bradd pitt,but i aint sloth from the goonies either.one thing thats also bugging me is not having gotten in shape sooner,cause lets face it,women are attracted to masculine men,both in body and mindstate,so yeah.im overweight,but not obese.

and thats probably not helped much either.or it could be cause i just havent tried that much to begin with.i mean,what do you do when no one seems interested in you like that,or feels you like that? i know if i was in shape,it would be different.ive started to lose weight.now its like a whole year has gone bye,and no gf,ive met some,but nothing happened.had a ons in april,but that just went eh.and it seems like everyone else around me is meeting chicks and stuff,and im not.and in some ways i am a tad jealous perhaps.i have been using myspace,say what you want,it is a good resource for meeting girls.ive asked some out,some said yes.it is taking the easy way out,but i think most want to get beyond that.im trying to stay positive minded,its hard,but i try.it feels like ive always been behind everyone else in life.its felt like whats wrong with me?

like i have social developmental problems.know what i mean? im not sure if i explained this way i originally thought it out.but i think it speaks for itsself.i know its long,and i appreciate any feedback.and i dont mean to sound like im bi-tching,but its like why me? why did this happen to me? what can i do to feel better? get better etc? ive never had any sort of ltr.is that bad? what does that say about someone? am i worried about that too much? i mean,i heard a saying once,dont think,just do.i suppose that would work.any one else who can relate? what has worked for you? what hasnt?
 
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"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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onyx

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man edit that **** and paragraph it, its hurting my eyes
 

onyx

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Actually i've read it though it hurt my eyes like ****

you know where you want to impove....write down what you want to improve in a list and how you will accomplish it

If your not happy with not havbing a better social ife, do something about it...i.e. get a job...I met some of my best friends through 1 of my old jobs and stay socialise with them now

I was the same like 2-3 years ago..I didnt really have that many friends that I could hang around with other than been at college with them in the day. Outside college was ****, I used to hang around with my uncle who is 10 years older than me

I then found a job and made some new friends, was introduced to his friends, and things branched from that, now i've got so many friends my social lift is hectic.

Like I said you put down what you want to change in your post above, make a list of it, and how your going to accomplish what you've said you want to change
 

turbo350z

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To answer your question, it happened to you because you let it. I know that sounds cruel, but it's the truth. The best thing for you now is to stop obsessing about it.

You didn't miss out on anything yet. Thats not the way to look at it. Look at it this way. "Damn I'm only 21, I can have so much fun." You are in the prime right now bud. Know that. Everyone has some sh1tty days dude, you are not alone. You are letting it get to you and that is a mistake.

I have some advice for you. Do what you will with it:

1) Stop coming down hard on yourself. If you think you are a useless POS, everyone else will feel the same. Learn that there is nothing wrong with you. Even the most a$$ ugly guy in the world (not saying you are) can get laid and have an awesome time.

2) I like onyx's idea. Get a new job, or a second job. This is a great way to meet cool people. If you do this, you have to let it be known that you are willing to go out and have a good time. If you don't, you're gonna fall into the same trap you're in now.

3) If the job idea won't work for you, join a sports team or a group for something. This is another really easy way to find people to hang out with.

Remember this. You will be fine, if and only if you stop feeling like crap. You are bringing yourself down. ;)
 

Delta

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to articulate the obvious-

YOU ARE TWENTY FREAKING ONE!!!

get over it and live! OTHERWISE YOU REALLY WILL MISS OUT ON LIFE!

you have plenty of time. you are young! life has barely begun!

delta
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Maybnoob

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I'll tell you this. The only way to get over such a feeling is to start seezing the day... Make the most of the time you have left.. you could die anytime.. so seize the day.. Live without regrets is the only way to shake that feeling trust me
 

OddManOut85

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well,i appreciate the input.so im gonna try and respond to all at once.i have made a list.but like i havent taken action yet.i suppose it took sometime to realize all of it.i do have a job.a job,although it gets to me sometimes,i do enjoy it.and ive met some people through there.but like i said,not being in school sucks.its like really bothering me.

i know it happened because i let it.and its like how did i? how did it happen? why didnt i change things sooner? its like i cant focus on other things sometimes.i let it go to me cause like i said,i feel stuck.i dont feel like a useless pos,im just not happy with myself.i know any guy can get some,but even those guys have the charisma,charm,etc.

know what im saying? so thats something to work on too.i have been bringing myself down for too long.its time to stop.i have people to hang out with.its just i havent made it grown.i suppose i cant see life having begun because i feel i havent i lived it as much,if that makes sense.how do you seize the day?
 

Bvbidd

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You just sound like your average 21 year old slacker.
You got a certain lifestyle your used to at this point, and it's not easy for you to suddenly change.. but since there isn't much you can do about your past just fvking do what YOU want to do then. (And I know your a slacker, so you'll wanna do stuff like eat or watch a movie) Think about what you REALLY wanna do and then do that, not anything else. If that means working your ass off and getting in school at this point, it's possible. But you only wanna do that because everybody else's lives look so much better. Do what you actually wanna do I noticed in your first post you already said that your doing things for that.. even if it's myspace.. so just keep doing things that'll help you in the long run. Oh, yah and seize the day also means do things in general you feel like doing with other people.

I don't get any other problems, I mean you say your jealous you have some friends meeting girls, then go meet girls.
 

backbreaker

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i'm 23 and I live pretty comfortable and I still don't think I am near my prime as far as fun having. I think I am honestly a good 3 maybe even 4 years away
 

OddManOut85

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i am somewhat a slacker i guess.i dont want to be.but procrastination has always been a problem for me.im trying to change.well i actually wanna go to school and move on.its been quite a struggle.in terms of others things,i need some motivation.i think one thing thats ultimatley bothering me,is,like im always single.and its like month after month and then year after year,and no gf.while everyone else is.its happening.so like feeling a bit behind in the experience dept. its like everyone else is meeting someone,and im not.whats wrong with me,etc.its like i cant seem to.or no one is interested in me like that.and everyone else is going on about this and that.and im like left behind.like thats one thing thats always bothered me.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

Bvbidd

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yeah you gotta keep doing things so they have a reason to think higher of you.
 
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