"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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How to get over a relationship?

Redux

Don Juan
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So, big story short. I'm no DJ. I'm just your regular 17 years old male.
I always got my way with girls and never needed or had the desire to have a gf.
Anyways, I got one, and I was really in love with her. He were together for 5 months and broke up 4 times during which, the last time being yesterday.
She told me stuff like "I really like you, but I feel I dont truly love you or I would have given myself completely to you" and that kinda sh!t.
Thing is, I no I can't go back to her, cause I dont wanna end hurt again, but I really love her, and spent parts of my day thinking about her.
What to do to get over her?
Thanks bros, honestly.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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GaryUranga

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get a life and find other stuff to do.. time helps, and if you ever wanna get a chance with her cut all contact with her for now, dont be needy, dont be too available, go for other girls, communicate that you dont need her with your actions.
 

Redux

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I already have a life, and, as a matter of fact am very passionate about my goal of being a world-class weightlifter. I have cut all contact with her, obviously.
Thank you both for the help, it's kind of you.
 

The Shocker

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Redux said:
I already have a life, and, as a matter of fact am very passionate about my goal of being a world-class weightlifter. I have cut all contact with her, obviously.
Thank you both for the help, it's kind of you.
Sounds like you got it under control. Remember, most important are TIME and PERSPECTIVE. Perspective comes over the course of time...
 

Redux

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Yeah, you learn a thing or two after going trough this kinda stuff 3 times. I'm feeling great most of the day, like I finnally turned the page over, I just miss her when I'm about to sleep and think about the sh!t we did together, the sex, and so on.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Redux

Don Juan
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mr_elor said:
As I say, replace the thought. Personally I'll think of an idea for a film but whatever works for you, it doesn't matter as long as it takes your focus away from her.

Again, don't even try to not think about her, don't focus on this problem too much, completely replace the thought. To help you your thoughts must be completely disassociated from her.
Thanks for the advice. I'm replacing it for weightlifting. Thing is I don't know if I still want to be with her or not. Not very DJ to not be certain it seems from what I've read. Anyways, not thinking about her def. can't do me bad.
Cheers.
 

Redux

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I'm sorry to bring this back from the dead, but are all girls hors? Also, I'm honestly asking that. While I was with this girl, I had her cousin (which had bf for one month or so) was hitting on me like crazy. Then, not even a week after we break up her best girl friend is also messaging me like all the time, and seriously interested in me, and she has a bf for 5 months. I mean, what the hell gives?
 

snobby

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seems to me you are more of a don juan than a huge amount of guys on this board.
 

DJsomeday

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Some girls are with their bfs just to be with somebody (aka not being alone), so it isn't really that weird to see a couple where one part doesn't REALLY like the other part xD, that or you might look like brad pitt :p.
 

The Shocker

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Yeah, most girls are hors. The trick for a real DJ is being able to get it on with the others...otherwise you're just a guy with above average game, looks, money, etc.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Redux

Don Juan
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snobby said:
seems to me you are more of a don juan than a huge amount of guys on this board.
Haha, thanks man. I doubt it. I just want to have fun. In absence of bros, with hos :D

DJsomeday said:
Some girls are with their bfs just to be with somebody (aka not being alone), so it isn't really that weird to see a couple where one part doesn't REALLY like the other part xD, that or you might look like brad pitt :p.
I see. She is already saying that he isn't OFFICIALLY her bf and that she isn't really compromised (although they have been together to the exclusion of others for 5 months). It amuses me to no end when she tries to play like she is the prize and then says things like that haha.
That would be nice. Not really, I'm just strong willed and can move people as I want :D
The Shocker said:
Yeah, most girls are hors. The trick for a real DJ is being able to get it on with the others...otherwise you're just a guy with above average game, looks, money, etc.
First I need to actually differ hors from the other girls. If before I thought none was a hor, know I see all as hors. I need a happy balance.

Oh well, this is a nice community. Thanks all for your answers!
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Victory Unlimited

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Yo Troops!

One good way to get over a girl is to change the way you think about her.

How is this done?

You do this by linking massive amounts of NEGATIVITY to your current way of thinking about her, while simultaneously linking massive amounts of POSITIVITY to the all the benefits of being WITHOUT her.

And if you do this over time consistently enough, AND with enough EMOTION behind it, YOU WILL CHANGE the way you think about her, and you will FEEL better.

March on, soldier.

And good luck in this FIGHT!!!
 

supajsilver2

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You know victory unlimited, I subconsciously did the same exact thing a little while ago coming off a really long relationship, and it worked. I picked out all the sh*t she did that I hated and for awhile, even though it was a friendly breakup, I started to dislike her very much.

However, after that point and she was a nobody to me...all of the sudden with new schedules she's in all of my classes almost, I see her everywhere, it's been a few months, and I'm regrettably falling for her again. Damn.

Ugh.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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