"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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How to get over a divorce or broken engagement?

B

Bud_Fox

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Does anyone have any advice on this topic? How did you recover?

In most of these cases it is usually the female who wants the breakup.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Rubirosa

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Improve yourself and your life so that you can bang hotter/better chicks than her.............
 

SecondHalf

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^^^^ what he said.

If you're still in contact with her, stop.
Close the door hard.

If you're sitting around grieving, stop.
Get busy, hit the gym, take a course, join some meetup groups.

If you're alone, take steps to fix that.

It takes time and there is a process that seems to take place, but by making the decision to take control of your life (emotions), you'll start feeling better almost immediately.

SH
 

Desdinova

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Rubirosa said:
Improve yourself and your life so that you can bang hotter/better chicks than her.............
That's what I did.

It took me a bit to recover from the issues that were in my marriage, but work and time can repair most of the damage.
 

mrRuckus

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The absolute best thing is no contact, but about 1% have the cajones to do it. They always either dismiss the notion completely or cave in because most dudes are weak. They'll turn into women and rev up the hamster rationalization machine to rationalize why they should stay in contact because they WANT to stay in contact. It's not about what you want, but what you need.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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mrRuckus

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Oh yea, another way to get over it is to go find some current pictures of former exes and see how fvcking ugly they've gotten and remember how broken up you were over those broken b1tches and how thankful you are that you didn't get stuck with them. Your current girl will probably be just as broken in 10 years. Picture how happy your older self will be that you didn't get stuck with that cow.
 

Cheeks

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No matter what you do, you're always going to have that painful feeling in your chest for a couple months or so.

But then, one day, you'll wake up and just say "fvck it". Just happened to me.
 

Findog

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I'm going through a similar situation. But ultimately your path to salvation is to take Rubirosa's advice: improve yourself, for your own sake. But a side effect or benefit is to become the kind of man that if your ex ever got a glimpse of who you became or what you are now, she'd kick herself and think "Oh my God, what did I do?"

It's normal to be sad and depressed for awhile and to beat yourself up, but at a certain point you have to move on and do things for yourself. Go to the gym, get off facebook, focus on your career, get busy with a personal project or a hobby, nurture your friendships...that's all you can do. You can't control what your ex thinks, feels or does. No Contact is now for you to heal and figure out what you want to do with the rest of your life.
 

Buddha_Mind

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Findog said:
I'm going through a similar situation. But ultimately your path to salvation is to take Rubirosa's advice: improve yourself, for your own sake. But a side effect or benefit is to become the kind of man that if your ex ever got a glimpse of who you became or what you are now, she'd kick herself and think "Oh my God, what did I do?"

It's normal to be sad and depressed for awhile and to beat yourself up, but at a certain point you have to move on and do things for yourself. Go to the gym, get off facebook, focus on your career, get busy with a personal project or a hobby, nurture your friendships...that's all you can do. You can't control what your ex thinks, feels or does. No Contact is now for you to heal and figure out what you want to do with the rest of your life.
Solid advice. Rep+ man.
 
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