How To Get Better Results with OLD/Tinder?

[Zimbabwe]

I much prefer Cold Approach, but with most Meetups being Online only and everyone still hesitant about going out, I figured I might stick with OLD for now.

My current Blueprint is

Me:Hey, What's up?
Her:Good and you?
Me:Here's my Number "9000" Text me

At this point it's only a few that Text me

Her: Hey it's me
Me: This Saturday I'm heading to Sosuave Cafe at 3pm, you should join me.

Am i texting too little here or do I need to modify what i say a little bit for the best results?

 

[Black Widow Void]

Aw C'mon... "it's only a few that Text [you]" ?

I'm trying to picture *any* woman that would be amenable to text game that you provided above. This isn't to put you down, but seriously... I'd be suspect that any girl would be open to these intros.

If she has a dime-a-dozen profile, she's already received a lot of dime-a-dozen replies. If she's revealed something unique (or, she thinks that she's being unique, though really isn't) hone in on that.

If you focus too much / too long on her uniqueness, you can overdo it and come across as more of a friend than a flirt. But women (heck, we all) like to be understood. Doing so, will differentiate you from the pack. Despite what these (so-called) "advice guru's" claim, you need to warm a woman up first (creating a bit of a sizzle).

 

[jamesfromhouston]

I much prefer Cold Approach, but with most Meetups being Online only and everyone still hesitant about going out, I figured I might stick with OLD for now.

My current Blueprint is

Me:Hey, What's up?
Her:Good and you?
Me:Here's my Number "9000" Text me

At this point it's only a few that Text me

Her: Hey it's me
Me: This Saturday I'm heading to Sosuave Cafe at 3pm, you should join me.

Am i texting too little here or do I need to modify what i say a little bit for the best results?

Hey dude, I remember we had been discussing OLD on a couple of threads before. Nice to see you're still going strong!

Since our last discussions, I've actually taken a more hands-off approach to OLD. I am GENUINELY convinced the girls there are MASSIVE time wasters. So rather than chase on OLD, I take the reactive approach and try to establish who has IL with me before I go further. Again I am not as old as other members on SS, so there is no age bias here. I truly think this is the way it is from my own experience.

This is my current approach:

I've signed up on Premium on Tinder that allows me to see who likes me.

I'll go in to check my Likes-list, once awhile. If I see someone I like, I will match with them. Occasionally, I will swipe blind but I try not to chase on OLD anymore. So I don't do this much.

So anyway if it is a Match, I will usually wait for them to start the conversation.

If after a few days, they don't, I'll usually drop a Hey. And if they respond me, I'll match their responses.

My messages usually are really short and more or less match theirs. I try to show them I don't text much on purpose.

Usually by 3rd message, I exchange contacts (I like to start with IG rather than phone number).

On my social media interaction with them, again I don't chase, I wait for them to make indiciations/moves then I respond.

Then I set up a date usually as early as within the week or as soon as I want to.

I believe there is no reason to set up any dates, if their IL is low. Also I believe there is no point in building up their interest level. I am really buying the RP mentality now.

___

Since we last caught up in my OLD thread, I've practically killed my text game. I don't text as much as I used to. It hasn't really affected my success to be honest. SO I've come to realize that texting truly doesn't help with game. Also, I've had instances where a girl has texted me loads but when we met up, we could not vibe. So text is really pointless brother.

(On a side note: I personally have more success with BUMBLE than the other apps. BUMBLE makes so the girl has to text you first, I find this is amazing in filtering out initial interest levels).

 

[Black Widow Void]

jamesfromhouston You mentioned a site that I've read about here and other places. Back when I was fully active on these sites, I never gave Bumble a try.

You're more qualified than I to comment, but here was my take. I figured that if I had to swipe to show interest and then wait for her to contact... it seemed like an unhealthy role reversal; sort of like I was in the olden days and dropping my hankie and hoping that a cowboy would notice me.
And then I thought to myself; what type of woman would be comfortable in the hunter/pursuer role and what type of man would she hope to attract with her masculine type of personalty role.

It looks like your younger and so your mileage may vary. The whole male/female role reversal does sort of weird me out a bit. Who knows? Maybe I need to keep more of an open mind to Bumble.

 

[jamesfromhouston]

jamesfromhouston You mentioned a site that I've read about here and other places. Back when I was fully active on these sites, I never gave Bumble a try.

You're more qualified than I to comment, but here was my take. I figured that if I had to swipe to show interest and then wait for her to contact... it seemed like an unhealthy role reversal; sort of like I was in the olden days and dropping my hankie and hoping that a cowboy would notice me.
And then I thought to myself; what type of woman would be comfortable in the hunter/pursuer role and what type of man would she hope to attract with her masculine type of personalty role.

It looks like your younger and so your mileage may vary. The whole male/female role reversal does sort of weird me out a bit. Who knows? Maybe I need to keep more of an open mind to Bumble.

I would totally agree with you.

That is the problem with TINDER and most OLD apps. It gives the women too much power. Not only do these women get hundreds/thousands of matches but equal amounts of guys opening them with countless greetings, jokes, pick-up lines or openers. The women are then put in a position where they can shop and select who they want to notice and chat to.

The problem I suppose is that men (especially BP men) are unaware of this, in their romantic idealism. So we end up chasing and propelling these women even further into the sky of a pedestal they're already on. All the while, unaware of our actual chances.

BUMBLE is only slightly better because after matching with a girl, the app forces the girl to start the conversation within a limited time frame before the match disappears. This at-least shows us which girls have actual initial interest compared to TINDER and other apps. But the problem is again the same; these girls can also be as flaky as those found in other apps. They could disappear at any moment too. Though overall, I found BUMBLE girls to be much better than TINDER in their commitment to take things further.

By no means an expert, but the above is just what I've experienced so far in spending time experimenting with these apps and even paying for their premium modes.

As a younger SS member, I think the wisdom shared by our more senior members have held true.

 

[Black Widow Void]

Not wishing to hijack this post, but wanted to say thanks for the well thought out response. If and when I decide to take on line dating some-what seriously again, I'm going to give Bumble a shot. You brought up several points that I wasn't aware of or had not thought about. Thanks for the response.

 

[Bingo-Player]

Your profile & what you are looking for

A lot of people don't think it matters but it does, nearly all these apps ask what you are looking for and i bet my life savings 90% of guys will put " something casual "

I think if you put "relationship" the app actually thinks you are higher value

Also ensure you have your height on there , a few interests / ambitions

I made a bumble last night *sigh* i did put a lot of work into my profile & pictures this time

Matched with a HB 7 and she messaged me twice so i already know interest is high and she lives really close to me , going to see if i can convert to a lay or if she just ends up being another waste of time

 

[eli77]

stick to the ones that are free .No more than seven pics and be very selective.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

I much prefer Cold Approach, but with most Meetups being Online only and everyone still hesitant about going out, I figured I might stick with OLD for now.

My current Blueprint is

Me:Hey, What's up?
Her:Good and you?
Me:Here's my Number "9000" Text me

At this point it's only a few that Text me

Her: Hey it's me
Me: This Saturday I'm heading to Sosuave Cafe at 3pm, you should join me.

Am i texting too little here or do I need to modify what i say a little bit for the best results?

That rapidity only works if you’re really GL.
Show a bit of wit and interest/awareness of her profile/pics/Spotify/IG. Then get her off Tinder and on to texting ASAP.

 

[CAPSLOCK BANDIT]

If you don't have good pictures and/or you aren't funny, OLD is a waste of time, it's better now cause you can add videos to your profile and pay to have messages highlighted.

The thing is, if you just buy premium once, get unlimited swipes and swipe on every woman in the country, you kind of undermine their monetization strategy, so from what I understand the less interaction you get the more buried you get. So you stay relatively high into the stack for like 2 weeks I guess, then spend 2 weeks declining until you rebuy your sub, then they place you back at the top, like on Tinder for example, every new sub there will be women who swiped no on you, swiping you again but maybe this time around they swipe yes, that is also the game of OLD.

 

[CAPSLOCK BANDIT]

If you don't have good pictures and/or you aren't funny, OLD is a waste of time, it's better now cause you can add videos to your profile and pay to have messages highlighted.

The thing is, if you just buy premium once, get unlimited swipes and swipe on every woman in the country, you kind of undermine their monetization strategy, so from what I understand the less interaction you get the more buried you get. So you stay relatively high into the stack for like 2 weeks I guess, then spend 2 weeks declining until you rebuy your sub, then they place you back at the top, like on Tinder for example, every new sub there will be women who swiped no on you, swiping you again but maybe this time around they swipe yes, that is also the game of OLD.

So if you've sent a bunch of sexually explicit messages and they blocked you, now they won't ever see you again, so it's better to be conservative

 

[Zimbabwe]

Aw C'mon... "it's only a few that Text [you]" ?

I'm trying to picture *any* woman that would be amenable to text game that you provided above. This isn't to put you down, but seriously... I'd be suspect that any girl would be open to these intros.

If she has a dime-a-dozen profile, she's already received a lot of dime-a-dozen replies. If she's revealed something unique (or, she thinks that she's being unique, though really isn't) hone in on that.

If you focus too much / too long on her uniqueness, you can overdo it and come across as more of a friend than a flirt. But women (heck, we all) like to be understood. Doing so, will differentiate you from the pack. Despite what these (so-called) "advice guru's" claim, you need to warm a woman up first (creating a bit of a sizzle).

Most women dont even reply to the first message no matter what I send, the batting average on OLD hasn't been good since i first used Tinder in 2013. I've always copied and pasted replies to different women no matter what they say. It's been a very automated approach from the start.

Hey dude, I remember we had been discussing OLD on a couple of threads before. Nice to see you're still going strong!

Since our last discussions, I've actually taken a more hands-off approach to OLD. I am GENUINELY convinced the girls there are MASSIVE time wasters. So rather than chase on OLD, I take the reactive approach and try to establish who has IL with me before I go further. Again I am not as old as other members on SS, so there is no age bias here. I truly think this is the way it is from my own experience.

This is my current approach:

I've signed up on Premium on Tinder that allows me to see who likes me.

I'll go in to check my Likes-list, once awhile. If I see someone I like, I will match with them. Occasionally, I will swipe blind but I try not to chase on OLD anymore. So I don't do this much.

So anyway if it is a Match, I will usually wait for them to start the conversation.

If after a few days, they don't, I'll usually drop a Hey. And if they respond me, I'll match their responses.

My messages usually are really short and more or less match theirs. I try to show them I don't text much on purpose.

Usually by 3rd message, I exchange contacts (I like to start with IG rather than phone number).

On my social media interaction with them, again I don't chase, I wait for them to make indiciations/moves then I respond.

Then I set up a date usually as early as within the week or as soon as I want to.

I believe there is no reason to set up any dates, if their IL is low. Also I believe there is no point in building up their interest level. I am really buying the RP mentality now.

___

Since we last caught up in my OLD thread, I've practically killed my text game. I don't text as much as I used to. It hasn't really affected my success to be honest. SO I've come to realize that texting truly doesn't help with game. Also, I've had instances where a girl has texted me loads but when we met up, we could not vibe. So text is really pointless brother.

(On a side note: I personally have more success with BUMBLE than the other apps. BUMBLE makes so the girl has to text you first, I find this is amazing in filtering out initial interest levels).

I'm not 100% on board with that Social media strategy, most women use that to gain orbiters. If you have a really good profile with at least 2k followers i Could see it working but i personally deleted mine since i spent too much time on it.

I've always tried to get them off OLD ASAP, I think it's universally agreed upon on this forum that this strategy works.

The reason they seem like they are good at texting is because they have time to think up what they can respond with, sometimes they even get their friends to text for them. This is why they seem completely different in person. You should know that her group chat will see every text exchange you guys have.

Your profile & what you are looking for

A lot of people don't think it matters but it does, nearly all these apps ask what you are looking for and i bet my life savings 90% of guys will put " something casual "

I think if you put "relationship" the app actually thinks you are higher value

Also ensure you have your height on there , a few interests / ambitions

I made a bumble last night *sigh* i did put a lot of work into my profile & pictures this time

Matched with a HB 7 and she messaged me twice so i already know interest is high and she lives really close to me , going to see if i can convert to a lay or if she just ends up being another waste of time

It depends on the app you use, the more relationship orientated ones like hinge and coffee meets bagel have a more older/relationship minded demographic.

I have no problem getting tons of matches, but it's rare if they ever amount to anything. I would say over 60% don't even reply to the initial message. This is including girls who message first.

That rapidity only works if you’re really GL.
Show a bit of wit and interest/awareness of her profile/pics/Spotify/IG. Then get her off Tinder and on to texting ASAP.

I've tried that, trying to be witty and creative but i get the same results.

If you don't have good pictures and/or you aren't funny, OLD is a waste of time, it's better now cause you can add videos to your profile and pay to have messages highlighted.

The thing is, if you just buy premium once, get unlimited swipes and swipe on every woman in the country, you kind of undermine their monetization strategy, so from what I understand the less interaction you get the more buried you get. So you stay relatively high into the stack for like 2 weeks I guess, then spend 2 weeks declining until you rebuy your sub, then they place you back at the top, like on Tinder for example, every new sub there will be women who swiped no on you, swiping you again but maybe this time around they swipe yes, that is also the game of OLD.

In the early days we had an auto swipe app, i used to go to sleep and wake up to like 40 new matches. Back in 2013 Tinder was a goldmine with how easy it was to automate the whole thing. I used to just copy and paste the same message to like 90 matches at the end of the week.

Now it's a lot harder and it takes way more effort

 

[EyeBRollin]

Full blueprint for OLD found in my signature.

 

[Bingo-Player]

I do agree there is a big question mark over the economics of OLD now

I'm quite logical so i am looking at the proposition and not really seeing how it can benefit me in either free or premium versions

conversion on OLD has always been horrific even in tinder's hayday my conversion to actual sex was less than 5% and i had a thousand matches at one point

Free - nerfed amount of swipes / matches / profile visibility - may be lucky to match 2/3 women a week - actual conversion is going to be low


Paid - time needed on the app goes through the roof - is ridiculously expensive and a waste of money - will still have same conversion rate just higher amount of matches


Females want to feel connection to a male ...... they cannot feel anything through old which is why it is so disposable

As another user said above it always feels like you need to get them off the app as quickly as possible which is kind of defeating the entire point of it

The time , energy and money you spend on old , would be far better served towards a hobbie or social experience

This is how you properly build circles and gain access to women that aren't going to forget who you are after 15 minutes

 

[SW15]

That is the problem with TINDER and most OLD apps. It gives the women too much power.

BUMBLE is only slightly better

Bumble is only slightly better because the male-female ratio is slightly better. Both are still sausage fests.

 

[Barrister]

I much prefer Cold Approach, but with most Meetups being Online only and everyone still hesitant about going out, I figured I might stick with OLD for now.

My current Blueprint is

Me:Hey, What's up?
Her:Good and you?
Me:Here's my Number "9000" Text me

At this point it's only a few that Text me

Her: Hey it's me
Me: This Saturday I'm heading to Sosuave Cafe at 3pm, you should join me.

Am i texting too little here or do I need to modify what i say a little bit for the best results?

While I am all in on the mindset of getting the date quickly with little chit chat on OLD, you are going to have to do a little more than you are doing here to get them to invest a little. They will always put something silly in their profiles about pets, travel, or hobbies. My opening was always to comment on that - get them going for a bit of back and forth with it to ease them up. Then make the offer with date/time for a date. You don't have to go on and on with them online nor do I think that is a good strategy. However, this bare bones approach you are doing I think is going to net you very little success.

Not to say you will have a great percentage on OLD in the first place. It is certainly volume-based.

 

[Hal9000]

Once I actually got a girl into a conversation on OLD I would typically ask her to meet up within the first dozen or so messages. There are so many fakes and flakes on there that I went ahead and screened them as to whether they had any real desire to actually meet. Learned my lesson chatting with some of them for weeks with them making constant excuses why they couldn't get together. Unwillingness to meet means either low interest or you are getting catfished and are talking to either a land whale or a dude.

 

[Dust 2 Dust]

Ive done OLD off and on for nearly 20 years and offering matches my number has never worked all the times Ive tried it. You gotta get their number and work from there. After 3-4 message exchanges casually ask if theyd like to chat on the phone.

Tinder is 78% male users. Of the 22% female users how many are bots, catfishes, and scammers? I wouldnt be surprised if less than 10% of their user base is real women.

You gotta get them off the app ASAP-no more than 3-4 message exchanges TOPS and next any woman who "needs to get to know you better first". Women on these apps have tons of options and even shorter attention spans.

 

[Bokanovsky]

I haven't used Tinder in years. Bumble and Hinge seem to be much better, at least in my area. But the blueprint is really very simple.

1. Have good pics. This is obviously by FAR the most important factor for maximizing the amount of matches you are going to generate.
2. Do not put too much info about yourself in the profile but absolutely DO mention anything that adds value. If you are tall or have a good job, make sure that you mention your height and occupation.
3. Engage in some basic conversation with the girl before asking her out. Find out what she does for a living, where she lives, what her hobbies are and maybe other basic information. The objective is to build a little bit of rapport before you ask her out. However, do not spend too much time texting back and forth. Really, you are trying to strike a balance between too much texting and too little. From my experience, if a girl matches with you and invests a little bit of time in correspondence (and responds to your messages in a prompt fashion), there is about a 90% chance that she will say yes if you ask her to meet you.
4. Suggest meeting for drinks at a nearby bar. If she says yes, ask her for a phone number and suggest discussing logistics via text. The reason why you should get her phone number is because this will minimize the risk of flaking. if she is willing to give her number to a stranger she met though OLD, it means that she really is trying to meet someone in person and not just using OLD for validation purposes. If she is reluctant to give you her number, NEXT.