okay i really need help on this. i'm sure my problem is too basic for most of you but i really need help. i'm a pretty good looking guy and no doubt my girlfriend's very attracted to me. i'm in college and she's in her last year of high school. the thing is every morning i would pick her up from her house and drop her off to school. i would walk with her to her first period class and i would take a long walk by myself back to my car. everyday i would do this. sometimes i would wake up late and she'd call me and would ask me where i'am. right away i would brush my teeth and hurry on to her house in minutes. i'm very attracted to this girl to the point that i would do almost anything for her and i hate it cuz i feel that she has the control over me and i feel that with me doing everything and being there for her all the time takes the attraction away if you know what i mean. it's almost as if she takes me for granted which i really hate. i came kind of pretty late on this dating scene and it's safe to say that i don't know much about girls or women. I NEED TO GET HER ATTRACTION FOR ME BACK. can anyone make this possible?...i feel like i'm being clingy or needy or whatever...sucks so bad.
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
How to get back her attraction
- Thread starter vagrant
- Start date
“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
Dannyrt34
Master Don Juan
It would sound simple to just say "start applying the DJ principles you have learned on her". But your problem is a complicated one, you have already came across to her as an AFC. She now sees you as somebody she can control. For future reference, you need to establish a manly, DJish opinion of you in her mind from the start. It's easy to get a girl to form an opinion of you, it's nearly impossible for you to change it.
You need to start now to have any hope, tell her she needs to find a ride to school, or that she owes you something for all ur hard work (I like massages). Just STOP being so available all the time, and get ****y.
You need to start now to have any hope, tell her she needs to find a ride to school, or that she owes you something for all ur hard work (I like massages). Just STOP being so available all the time, and get ****y.
Interesting.
Old, but interesting nonetheless.
Just a fair warning, you might get shot down for being a 'newb' to the concepts, although that should be nothing that stops you from seeking out the information you need to improve your game, as you're already doing. On that I salute you.
Anyways, the easier method would be to just do your homework. A lot of these guys here who've gone from a social dud to a stud, have really put in their time... reading books, ordering personal improvement cds, and going through the fire of trial and error. You're dealing with a community of men who aren't taking no for an answer.
The other, probably more applicable solution would be this: give her the gift of missing you. Pretty recognizable concept, if you've been around. Credit David DeAngelo. Spend some time away from her. Find some other things that you would want to do by yourself, for yourself, if you hadn't had her in your life. Take up a sport you can play, study some subjects by yourself, basically, find an area of your life where you would like to improve, and work on it - by yourself.
This accomplishes two things for you:
1. It takes your mind off of her. When you start enjoying your own company more than you enjoy company with others, the irony is, others start enjoying your company as well. The saying goes, "I don't need to attract others to myself, I just need to be attracted enough to myself for them." Try it.
2. Piggybacking on reason #1, you'll get a more interested girlfriend in return. Ultimately, women don't want clingy men. They don't want men who're going to seek out their guidance in a relationship. They want a man who they could cling to, and whose leadership they could submit to. Be that guy, or she'll find him for you... without you.
Hope this helps, make the most of it champ.
Old, but interesting nonetheless.
Just a fair warning, you might get shot down for being a 'newb' to the concepts, although that should be nothing that stops you from seeking out the information you need to improve your game, as you're already doing. On that I salute you.
Anyways, the easier method would be to just do your homework. A lot of these guys here who've gone from a social dud to a stud, have really put in their time... reading books, ordering personal improvement cds, and going through the fire of trial and error. You're dealing with a community of men who aren't taking no for an answer.
The other, probably more applicable solution would be this: give her the gift of missing you. Pretty recognizable concept, if you've been around. Credit David DeAngelo. Spend some time away from her. Find some other things that you would want to do by yourself, for yourself, if you hadn't had her in your life. Take up a sport you can play, study some subjects by yourself, basically, find an area of your life where you would like to improve, and work on it - by yourself.
This accomplishes two things for you:
1. It takes your mind off of her. When you start enjoying your own company more than you enjoy company with others, the irony is, others start enjoying your company as well. The saying goes, "I don't need to attract others to myself, I just need to be attracted enough to myself for them." Try it.
2. Piggybacking on reason #1, you'll get a more interested girlfriend in return. Ultimately, women don't want clingy men. They don't want men who're going to seek out their guidance in a relationship. They want a man who they could cling to, and whose leadership they could submit to. Be that guy, or she'll find him for you... without you.
Hope this helps, make the most of it champ.
first of all...what the heck is AFC?!?!?!...wait..WUHHH?!?!...start applying the DJ principles i've learned on her!?!?!?...what does that supposed to mean?...grrrr i'm sounding like a real noob here.Dannyrt34 said:It would sound simple to just say "start applying the DJ principles you have learned on her". But your problem is a complicated one, you have already came across to her as an AFC. She now sees you as somebody she can control. For future reference, you need to establish a manly, DJish opinion of you in her mind from the start. It's easy to get a girl to form an opinion of you, it's nearly impossible for you to change it.
You need to start now to have any hope, tell her she needs to find a ride to school, or that she owes you something for all ur hard work (I like massages). Just STOP being so available all the time, and get ****y.
you're right. she does see me as the guy she can control and that's because i'm letting her and cuz my stupid brain is telling me that THAT is exactly what she likes. someone who would give her eveything and be with her all the time. the thing is, i really need to know whether girls are really attracted to those guys who they can NOT control or if it's merely a myth!!!!!
*cough*vagrant said:the thing is, i really need to know whether girls are really attracted to those guys who they can NOT control or if it's merely a myth!!!!!
True. Definitely true.
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
number 2 sounds very scary...see, the thing is i know i can be that which ever she wants but the thing is i'm so dumb when it comes to chicks that i really have no idea what the hell they want. i don't know the traits that women are looking for. looking back i've told her so much about me that shows how weak i'am...grrrrr...if i don't do something i'm really going to loose this chick which i don't want to happen cuz she's definitely a keeper. what i want is for her to see me and be afraid she'll loose me cuz in her mind the next chick would be the luckiest b8tch on earth.Cruise said:Interesting.
Old, but interesting nonetheless.
Just a fair warning, you might get shot down for being a 'newb' to the concepts, although that should be nothing that stops you from seeking out the information you need to improve your game, as you're already doing. On that I salute you.
Anyways, the easier method would be to just do your homework. A lot of these guys here who've gone from a social dud to a stud, have really put in their time... reading books, ordering personal improvement cds, and going through the fire of trial and error. You're dealing with a community of men who aren't taking no for an answer.
The other, probably more applicable solution would be this: give her the gift of missing you. Pretty recognizable concept, if you've been around. Credit David DeAngelo. Spend some time away from her. Find some other things that you would want to do by yourself, for yourself, if you hadn't had her in your life. Take up a sport you can play, study some subjects by yourself, basically, find an area of your life where you would like to improve, and work on it - by yourself.
This accomplishes two things for you:
1. It takes your mind off of her. When you start enjoying your own company more than you enjoy company with others, the irony is, others start enjoying your company as well. The saying goes, "I don't need to attract others to myself, I just need to be attracted enough to myself for them." Try it.
2. Piggybacking on reason #1, you'll get a more interested girlfriend in return. Ultimately, women don't want clingy men. They don't want men who're going to seek out their guidance in a relationship. They want a man who they could cling to, and whose leadership they could submit to. Be that guy, or she'll find him for you... without you.
Hope this helps, make the most of it champ.
insanity
Master Don Juan
men in general seem to forget this word when dating a woman. "NO". that has to be the best way of keeping attraction in the eyes of a woman. sure you can be nice and do things for them but don't let them take advantage of you. i use the word no quite a bit and sure they huff and puff but don't give in. they learn respect that way.
I never said it wasn't going to be scary.vagrant said:number 2 sounds very scary...see, the thing is i know i can be that which ever she wants but the thing is i'm so dumb when it comes to chicks that i really have no idea what the hell they want. i don't know the traits that women are looking for. looking back i've told her so much about me that shows how weak i'am...grrrrr...if i don't do something i'm really going to loose this chick which i don't want to happen cuz she's definitely a keeper. what i want is for her to see me and be afraid she'll loose me cuz in her mind the next chick would be the luckiest b8tch on earth.
Look. Let me break it down to you like this: The s.hit is all evolution. You hear what the fukc I'm saying? Evolution. Evolve. Grow. The strong survive. The weak lose out. Rich get richer. Poor get poorer. Predators and prey. S.hit like that.
Women don't think to themselves how nice you are, or how good you are at being a silent pushover as the world passes by you. She doesn't want to go to the movies with you to see a hero. She's not thinking to herself - "I want the most boring, unintelligent, unambitious little b.itch of a weakling... where can I find him?" She wants you to be the hero. The head cheerleader wants to get f.ucked by the captain of the football team. Not the waterboy.
Guess what separates the waterboy from the Captain?
Balls.
Nothing more, nothing less. Some big... fat... hairy... obtrusively... undeniably... succulent... BALLLLLLLLS.
Stop being a coward and create your own life. Or the world's going to change it for you, and own you in exchange.
damn!...that sh*t went straight to my brain. i can't even explain what's going through my mind right now but i'm ready to give it a shot. i know i got her bad from the beginning but since we're getting deeper in the relationship and she's getting to know me better and us hanging out more and more she's getting a little comfortable. i know exactly the things i went wrong and i'm determined to make some changes cuz it'll be for the better. thanks a lot man.Cruise said:I never said it wasn't going to be scary.
Look. Let me break it down to you like this: The s.hit is all evolution. You hear what the fukc I'm saying? Evolution. Evolve. Grow. The strong survive. The weak lose out. Rich get richer. Poor get poorer. Predators and prey. S.hit like that.
Women don't think to themselves how nice you are, or how good you are at being a silent pushover as the world passes by you. She doesn't want to go to the movies with you to see a hero. She's not thinking to herself - "I want the most boring, unintelligent, unambitious little b.itch of a weakling... where can I find him?" She wants you to be the hero. The head cheerleader wants to get f.ucked by the captain of the football team. Not the waterboy.
Guess what separates the waterboy from the Captain?
Balls.
Nothing more, nothing less. Some big... fat... hairy... obtrusively... undeniably... succulent... BALLLLLLLLS.
Stop being a coward and create your own life. Or the world's going to change it for you, and own you in exchange.
thanks a lot dude...come to think of it...that word lost its existence the first day she came in my life.insanity said:men in general seem to forget this word when dating a woman. "NO". that has to be the best way of keeping attraction in the eyes of a woman. sure you can be nice and do things for them but don't let them take advantage of you. i use the word no quite a bit and sure they huff and puff but don't give in. they learn respect that way.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.