How to Get a Girl Out of my Mind

[2c2bt]

I can't seem to stop thinking about a girl. I know she has no interest in me.
I see her once in awhile at the performing arts center.
But I have a hard time concentrating on doing anything in my life like trying to find a job, writing, rehearsing, cleaning, talking to other girls, and all around taking care of myself because I cannot get her out of my head.
I would like it if she likes me the same way, but it doesn't seems so.

I've been an afc all my life, although girls think I'm really cute. I have lots of esteem in how I look, and I am very clean cut and well dressed. The problem is I can never get girls to laugh. Especially this girl. It's not that she totally doesn't like me. She's interested in talking to me and stuff, but I don't think she likes me becuase I can never get her smiling and laughing. I try to be ineterested in what she is doing, but everytime I try to joke or tease, she has no response. I know she's not completely devoid of humer becuase she's actually known as a pretty funny girl.

I just want to get her out of my brain so I can move on with my life. I spent the entire last week doing nothing but sitting there thinking about her. That way I can move on with my life, and be productive.

 

[Mustache]

Look for other girls
When I just start at this forum I was falling in love with a girl
But now I flirt with many women
I still remember her, but I dont suffer anymore

 

[Doggystyle]

Can you make other people laugh?

You need to keep your mind occupied to get her out your head, get out and socialise as much as possibe. Be surrounded by people. You're social skills and sense of humor will improve by doing this also, especially if you meet funny and interresting people.

 

[2c2bt]

AAAAAAAA I’m such an iiiiiiiidiot!!!!!!!!
There was a good chance I could have scored with Her.
I had Her and another really fine girl in my car with my yesterday. And my friend was with us as well. 4 of us. I was dropping them all off. I was in the front with my Crush. We trust each other very well because even though we never talk at all before, we have known each other a good while. So she sees me with a lot of trust even though she never talks to me or gives me a second look when we are in a group setting. (To make this whole thing all the more difficult, I cannot show her that I like her, until I am sure she would be into me. She’s not just some strange girl that I can show I like right away, and put on the charm. We have sort of a working relationship in which things could get really weird if she finds out I like her.)

Anyway, this is what happened around noon yesterday. She was telling me how bored she was most of the summer because she didn’t have much to do. She asked me who I was dropping off first. Naturally, it was Her because she was in the area. My friend, and the other hot babe lived way on the other side of town near where I lived. So I told Her that I was going to drop her off first. She tells me to drop her off at her ExBF place instead of at her place. Obviously She would rather be with her ExBF instead of be alone at her place. Even though they recently broke up, they are still pretty close. And I know She likes sex, so I’m positive when I dropped her off, they proceeded to do it.

Here is how utterly stupid I am. Instead of telling her I was going to drop her off first, I could have given her the choice if she wanted to be dropped off first because she was closest, or if she wanted to hang out, and come downtown with us. We would drop the other 2 passengers off at their respective domiciles. And She could hang out with me at my place (where I would then see if she wanted to spend the night) for the rest of the day. Then either Her roommate can pick her up or I can take her home when she was ready. I have no doubt, there was a 60% chance She would have accepted, and came downtown with us instead of to her ExBF’s.

She’s only screwing him because he’s the only person she is that close to. She’s not the type to meet some random person, and screw. Because my stupid ass didn’t offer Her to come to my place, She never had the option to screw me. We would have dropped both of the other passengers off, and I would have been right there with Her trying to put my DJ teachings to use. Instead, I told her I was going to drop her off first, and left her right at her ugly ExBF’s place without even thinking about what I was doing. I did not realize till today what I had done. I’m so such an AFK!!!!


Then I drop my friend off who lives right by me. I am left in the care with the other hot babe. We stop by my place to use the bathroom before the trip to her place which was about half an hour further away. We did our thing, and left. I could have soooo EASILY asked her if she wanted stay at my place, and hang out. I could have soooo EASILY slept with her. But again, I wasn’t thinking straight. I’m kicking myself so hard right now for passing up 2 rare hot babe opportunities. Especially the first one with the girl I really liked.

Can you make other people laugh?

Holy sheet yes. Thanks for reminding me. I’m very very good at making people laugh. People actually look up to me because of my ability to come up with really funny punch lines during normal conversation. I think my mind was so distorted that I forgot about this. And here I was downing myself because one girl does not respond to my attempts at humor.

You need to keep your mind occupied to get her out your head, get out and socialise as much as possibe. Be surrounded by people. You're social skills and sense of humor will improve by doing this also, especially if you meet funny and interresting people.

This is quite a conundrum as no matter what I do, and where I go, I think about her and being in her arms. I really want to not take her so seriously, and concentrate on my life.

 

[DJsparky]

what you need to do is realise shes a waste of space, she isnt worth it, she should be worthless in your eyes, what she could offer you thousands of other girls could, now i want you to embrace this learn from the hurt because if u learn from ti u'll never be vulnerable to it again, remember shes nothing special

 

[2c2bt]

The hardest part of this whole thing is that I cannot be sure if she likes me or not. I have never been rejected by her as I cannot make any passes at her like I would a normal girl that I do not know personally.
I could have gotten her to my place yesterday, and tried to think of something, but that fell through thanks to my brainlessness.

But you do have good advice, she is nothing special. I know this logically, but am still trying to figure out how to get these feelings off of me. They are like a plague.

 

[DJsparky]

i know the feeling man, time and embracement will take this away, just make sure you learnt from the feelings to become stronger. i was obsessed witha girl i was with for 6 months, id call her everyday, id ring her on a night because id get the urge too its something i couldnt stop, she flaked on me loads, she became boring,dull because this was her true self, because under all that lust if you can see through it u'll know shes nothing special, anyways i ended up breaking with her when i was drunk, which hurt me the next day for about 4 days and then i adopted a new mindset were i told myself i will get over this girl shes nothing special and boom before you know it i did, that was one of the best things ive done in my life she was dragging me down because i didnt know how she felt about me and when u dont know how they feel about you its worse, so my advice to you dont analyse this, it isnt worth your life, theres 6 billion out there is she truly worth being the 1?

 

[Spookey]

Be active.
go out with your friends, join a club or sport team or something.
if you fill your time up, you wont be thinking or her.
you will also improve yourself and become more attractive to others

 

[2c2bt]

i know the feeling man, time and embracement will take this away

I feel like a crack addict. Time is good, and it would help if I don't see her considering being around her brings back all the feelings.
I can try to stay away from her so the feelings will go away.
If I see her, I intend to be strong enough to run away from her, but could break down, and be compelled to want to talk to her.

I have tried many times to think of negative things about her, but it only gets me to thinking how amazing she is. Total babe and pretty face 10. Super super sweet. Very bright over acheiver. Very mature and level headed. Takes excellent care of her body. She is so open to learning from others, and always wants to help.

Negative attributes are her ditzy voice. I wonder if she has the slightest awareness of how she talks. Her conformity to superficial standards (lack of depth and insight) although very open. Needs to be around people. Does not have much interest in computers, writing, or introverted stuff. I'll try to think of somemore. I'm thinking very hard, but I cannot come up with anything to make me not like her other than this.

 

[DJsparky]

I feel like a crack addict. Time is good, and it would help if I don't see her considering being around her brings back all the feelings.
I can try to stay away from her so the feelings will go away.
If I see her, I intend to be strong enough to run away from her, but could break down, and be compelled to want to talk to her.

I have tried many times to think of negative things about her, but it only gets me to thinking how amazing she is. Total babe and pretty face 10. Super super sweet. Very bright over acheiver. Very mature and level headed. Takes excellent care of her body. She is so open to learning from others, and always wants to help.

Negative attributes are her ditzy voice. I wonder if she has the slightest awareness of how she talks. Her conformity to superficial standards (lack of depth and insight) although very open. Needs to be around people. Does not have much interest in computers, writing, or introverted stuff. I'll try to think of somemore. I'm thinking very hard, but I cannot come up with anything to make me not like her other than this.

I want you to read what you said as if you was giving your brain orders on how to think, would you think its healthy thinking? would it help you get over her? because all of this is in your mind, theres that little voice in your head telling you how hot and how sophiscated she is,get rid of that voice by giving your brain positive information, just write yourself what you want to do then read it out, example "i will get over this girl it is her loss and i can get better" now with this methiod its a powerful tool if you believe you can do it

 

[2c2bt]

I will get over this girl.
It is her loss.
And I can get better.

Self message:
You can get over this girl, 2c2bt.
It is her loss, 2c2bt.
You can get better because you are soooo cute and full of everything hot girls dream of.
Except for the fact you are an AFC that sits home all day, and totally fails to recognize opportunities for getting laid even when thrown at you.
You suck 2cbt.
Just be happy and get out there, and make sure you find a job so you do not get evicted.

 

[jonwon]

I feel like a crack addict. Time is good, and it would help if I don't see her considering being around her brings back all the feelings.
I can try to stay away from her so the feelings will go away.
If I see her, I intend to be strong enough to run away from her, but could break down, and be compelled to want to talk to her.

I have tried many times to think of negative things about her, but it only gets me to thinking how amazing she is. Total babe and pretty face 10. Super super sweet. Very bright over acheiver. Very mature and level headed. Takes excellent care of her body. She is so open to learning from others, and always wants to help.

Negative attributes are her ditzy voice. I wonder if she has the slightest awareness of how she talks. Her conformity to superficial standards (lack of depth and insight) although very open. Needs to be around people. Does not have much interest in computers, writing, or introverted stuff. I'll try to think of somemore. I'm thinking very hard, but I cannot come up with anything to make me not like her other than this.

dam have you got it bad lol.

Your are the true defination of wimp maximus, read this guy and what ever you do avoid this stuff lol.

Grow some kaoonas and ask her out, say hey fancy catching a flick, take her to the pics or something just you two and take it from there.

Man you have it bad, read the bible and read some more of this site, dam i know guys like you exist but my god get a grip.

Not trying to be disrespectful but FFS this is not healthy way to go, what would you do if you saw her with another guy, yeh he will be labled the jerk when in fact he had the balls to ask her out.

The more you hesistate the more you masterbate

 

[2c2bt]

Thanks. Getting the balls to ask her out is not my problem.

The only reason I didn't ask her to come with me the last time was because of temporary stupidity. It just didn't occur to me to ask her, otherwise, I would have easily done it.

I can call her anytime I want to. I'd tell her I'd like to go out with her right in front of her face all day long, but it is not her that worries me. We are both performers, and have to be professional.

There is a huge public relations situation both of us have to live by. She's not just some girl I can walk up to, and ask out. It's hard to explain. Everything i say or do with her could go to the wrong people, and cause trouble for me.

I would have offered to take her to hang out at my place the other day, but that would have been totally void of showing romantic interest in her. That is until I got her to my place, and somehow worked it in such a way that it would seem like

She has not shown that she does not like me. She just doesn't laugh at my jokes, or isn't very playful with me. I do not have the greatest rapport with her. But the more I talk to her, the more she opens up. Either way, there are other girls in the world.

I want to froget about her, and concentrate on all these other girls I have at my feet. I want to be interested in them like I usually am. I want to stop thinking about her so much.

I'm also trying to learn more about myself because even though I know logically that I have no reason to feel this way for one girl, I am for some reason letter her affect my productrivity in life. Therefore, instead of rehearsing which I should be doing, I am here trying to get some insight into how I can tell myself to let go like the driving scene in fight club. Just let go.

I have a bad case of oneitis, and I have it bad. I might be a wuss because of it, but the only thing I can do is keep visiting the forum, and reading material that will help me overcome my weakness.

 

[jonwon]

Thanks. Getting the balls to ask her out is not my problem.

The only reason I didn't ask her to come with me the last time was because of temporary stupidity. It just didn't occur to me to ask her, otherwise, I would have easily done it.

I can call her anytime I want to. I'd tell her I'd like to go out with her right in front of her face all day long, but it is not her that worries me. We are both performers, and have to be professional.

There is a huge public relations situation both of us have to live by. She's not just some girl I can walk up to, and ask out. It's hard to explain. Everything i say or do with her could go to the wrong people, and cause trouble for me.

I would have offered to take her to hang out at my place the other day, but that would have been totally void of showing romantic interest in her. That is until I got her to my place, and somehow worked it in such a way that it would seem like

She has not shown that she does not like me. She just doesn't laugh at my jokes, or isn't very playful with me. I do not have the greatest rapport with her. But the more I talk to her, the more she opens up. Either way, there are other girls in the world.

I want to froget about her, and concentrate on all these other girls I have at my feet. I want to be interested in them like I usually am. I want to stop thinking about her so much.

I'm also trying to learn more about myself because even though I know logically that I have no reason to feel this way for one girl, I am for some reason letter her affect my productrivity in life. Therefore, instead of rehearsing which I should be doing, I am here trying to get some insight into how I can tell myself to let go like the driving scene in fight club. Just let go.

We all get infatuated with girls, hey we are human and male after all, as we get older it lessens, but we all hold onto material, for when we have alone time

Not sure how to help you, all i know being with her cant help none, maybe if she was out of your contact it would be easier, or maybe bite the bullet and not think about the consequences.

Is it not better to regret something you have done then something you wish you would have done, i dont mean wierd stuff i mean in this case is it a regret i did or a regret i did not, that is something you have to decide, me i take the regret i did not to be too much and change it into the regret i did, you never know after all.

 

[Doggystyle]

Holy sheet yes. Thanks for reminding me. I’m very very good at making people laugh. People actually look up to me because of my ability to come up with really funny punch lines during normal conversation. I think my mind was so distorted that I forgot about this. And here I was downing myself because one girl does not respond to my attempts at humor.

You humour is probably a lot different around her than the normal people you socialise with, I noticed you said "attempts at humor".

When your with your friends i'm guessing that your not attempting to make them laugh, but your rather naturally coming up with funny stuff because your mind isn't fixed on looking for it all the time.

Relax and be natural instead of trying to force a funny personality, it probably looks forced, which is why she isn't laughing

 

[2c2bt]

You humour is probably a lot different around her than the normal people you socialise with, I noticed you said "attempts at humor".

When your with your friends i'm guessing that your not attempting to make them laugh, but your rather naturally coming up with funny stuff because your mind isn't fixed on looking for it all the time.

Relax and be natural instead of trying to force a funny personality, it probably looks forced, which is why she isn't laughing

It's true. The rapport with her isn't there as it is with people who actually laigh at me. I think the situation that was getting to be had to do with rapport more than anything. Like there are certain girls I can develop instant rapport with, while others are a bit more elusive.

Is it not better to regret something you have done then something you wish you would have done, i dont mean wierd stuff i mean in this case is it a regret i did or a regret i did not, that is something you have to decide, me i take the regret i did not to be too much and change it into the regret i did, you never know after all.

Believe you me, I totally regret not offering to take her home with me the other day, and dropping her off to get liad by her ExBF instead. Such major blindness on my part is someting I'm beating myself up over. But that is different from the oneitis that I have been going through pretty bad.

She will no doubt be part of my life forever has we share common close friends. Ideally, I could look at her, and hang out with my friends without feeling a thing.

 

[Dannyrt34]

I think it's great.

So dude, this girl is driving you nuts. You can't stop thinking about her, you're a wreck, beating yourself up for making stupid decisions while being with her. You've known her for so long, and you are only friends, you're frustrated, you're sad, and you'd give anything to hold her in your arms and tell her how you feel, and have her return those feelings.

But, it's amazing that a girl can make you feel like this. All these emotions make you feel alive, they make you feel human. This situation sounds all too familiar to me. So why is it so hard to just walk away from her? Why can't you just say "Well, looks like I blew it, time to go meet some new girls."

Because, let's face it, you fell for her. And no matter how much our fellow DJ's tell you to forget about her, you know that just 'letting her slip your mind' is nearly impossible, and you would almost feel guilty just to do that.

All these feelings, the frustration, the lonliness, the solitude. These feelings let you know that something isn't right, they let you know deep down that you really should be moving on. But then again, at the same time, you keep thinking about how you want things to be with her, you think about how great she is, you get these warm feelings inside, you feel this certain happiness from just imagining how great it would be if this girl loved you back.

So who am I to tell you to "Just forget about her". I can't do that, because deep down I know exactly how you're feeling. This is very deep stuff. And no, I don't have any magical advice that will have her falling all over you, there is none. But I say, keep going out with her, if she has the ability to make you feel all of these emotions, then she should be part of your life. Trying to completely forget about her may just make you feel empty inside.

However, you do need to show some romantic interest ASAP. Because this story has "Let's just be friends" written all over it. Next time you take her out, take her someplace where the two of you can talk. Try something simple, get on your walking shoes and go for a walk through the park at night. And set the mood, tell her you heard strange noises behind the bushes while you're walking, hold her close, say "I'll protect you and fight off that mean old pervert hiding over there." Then scream at the bushes "COME OUT HERE AND FIGHT! This is my girl and you can't have her!" Ok that might be cheesy.... But I'm sure you catch my drift.

Oh and one more thing, go for the kiss close at the end of the night. Just make sure you set the mood, make her want it badly.

 

[S1NN3R]

The fastest way to get over a girl is to get under another girl.

 

[2c2bt]

I am a Don Juan, and need not see myself as an AFC.
No girl no matter how beautiful should have this effect on a true Suave master of seduction.

If I see her another time, and I can get her home with me, I can find a way to get our lips close enough together for a possible kiss. Then move in for it.
Otherwise, I can move on with my life.

Part of my stress involves looking for a job so I am not in danger of coming short on my bills for next month. Also rehearsing for my show on Thursday. I need to get my material on point for that.

Although I have spent far too long sitting doing, nothing, I look forward to a more productive week. No thoughts about any girl should distract a true DJ from real life, and ammassing massive wealth doing not the least bit of labor but performing for fun.

I cannot live my life as some AFC. I am a DJ with limitless potential. I have pure talent, and can move crowds and crowds. I am a popular figure of respect and admiration.
I am 2c2bt.

 

[2c2bt]

I thinkmy feelings have changed from one type fo oneities to a different type of oneitis.

At first I just couldn't stop thinking about her. I used to think about her alot, but never really talked to her. Last weekend was the first time her and I had an actual conversation, and I could have taken her home with me had I been thinking.

Now it's like I can't stop replaying this really stupid experience of not asking her to come home with me.

1. It's not just thoughts, but I can feel it with in my chest, the pain of what I ignorantly passed up. I think about how there will be other chances, but I cannot get myself to get over that golden opportunity that I threw away. It's eating me up every day.

2. Just like before, I am still trying to get her out of my mind, and have attempted various techniques to little avail. I still think of this onechick like always even though I know there are lots of hb10s out there that should be eating out of my hands.


GOOD NEWS:
Despite my disease, I managed to aquire some work over the weekend. I found a job. My oneitis had been keeping me from looking for work.

Also, I have managed to rehearse my routine very well, and will be back on stage tonight. And I will be taking a hot chick to the show with me. She's really really hot, but I'm far more at ease with her because I don't have those weird oneitis feelings around her like I do the other girl. Both of them are small time models.

Despite this good news, I still have yet to fully recover from that oneitis, and be the fully alive energetic person I want to be.