How to deal with boredom/loneliness?

[Dan08]

Hey guys,

I want to ask you guys how you deal with the times you might get bored or feel lonely.

I've looked around at my life recently and I have limited social interaction with my peers and that scares me.
The thought of the weekends with just myself for company scares me, I don't like being alone I've realised.

I don't believe I place my self-worth based around people's interactions with me, I merely like company and the interaction and the learning of a person that comes with it.

I've tried to keep busy, I now play squash with a friend on a friday afternoon whilst producing for a local radio show and uni keeps me very busy either side of this.
I read alot of books, I'm looking to take up martial arts on a sunday and rock climbing on a wednesday, fitted around gym sessions, and I want to perhaps find a way of continuing to play piano which is something that I've neglect since starting uni.

The evenings and weekends are a killer for me, I get bored easily and with boredom comes the inevitable turning of thoughts within my mind and I ask myself why am I alone currently? Why am I not seeing other people, doing other things etc? What else could I be doing with this time I'm wasting? How should I be living my life better?

I appreciate you can't be doing something all the time or interacting 24/7 and that perhaps I'm being a bit harsh on myself for thinking I should but I can't quite help think I'm missing out somehow.

See, at the beginning of last year I almost died for reasons I won't go into here and I think ever since then I'm always wanting to be living my life, to be doing something.

I feel I'm much more aware of the time I have then perhaps my peers and put pressure upon myself to experience more because of it, and yet because the old me didn't put the effort in when it counted I find myself lacking in the areas I want to explore upon.

I really don't know what to do with myself guys, I possibly feel a little down right now. I'd call my folks to talk to them but I don't wanna wake them up or worry them so you're my next stop guys.

~Dan

 

[LeonSK]

I used to feel the same way. Go out and make more friends, set goals, go on adventures.

 

[Suspens]

I've tried to keep busy, I now play squash with a friend on a friday afternoon whilst producing for a local radio show and uni keeps me very busy either side of this.

Buddy you are doing great already:

I read alot of books, I'm looking to take up martial arts on a sunday and rock climbing on a wednesday, fitted around gym sessions, and I want to perhaps find a way of continuing to play piano which is something that I've neglect since starting uni.

 

[GotED?]

A part of becoming a 'MAN' and gaining 'MATURITY' is to be comfortable in your own skin. There's a saying that you must first love yourself before you can love anyone else.

There's lots of truth in it - well you ask, how do you 'love yourself'??

The ultimate test is, do you enjoy being alone and can stand being by yourself??

If you feel lonely (to an unhealthy extent), then there's a sign that you are still relying on external feedback to replenish your self-esteem and as a man.

You are doing better than I am in socializing - so don't put yourself down. I don't have 1 person in my life who I can call and talk to (when I am not in a relationship that is). But that is my perogative and my free will choice - not for most people. However, it is not impossible - it takes a strong soul to not rely on others. And all souls are invariantly different in the end.

Be well.

Exodus