"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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How to deal with ****block, AMOG, annoying flat mates..?

M

MrGold

Don Juan
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Initially at the beginning of the year all 4 of them were cool. We got along real well, they never disrespected me, i was alpha, didnt take any shyt and told them when anything was done i didnt like..

Now two of them (both being proir best mates from back home) have turned into a pair of retards.. They annoy the CR4P outa me!! Specially when they're together, when they're seperate from each other they turn into humble little boys?

What the f\/ck do i have to do to have these pr!cks fear me? I cant beat em up 'cause ive gotta live with them for the rest of the year unfortunately..

Any decent advice would be appreciated..

Thanks in advance, Gold.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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M

MrGold

Don Juan
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Location
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My mistake, I didn't expand on the fact that I am actually quite repsectful. Ive never done anything they wouldn't want me to, pranks and stuff are equal from both sides.

However, these guys are a pair of rich, spoilt brats and believe they can say and do what they want when they like? Ive never outright 'torn them down', but they feel its normal to scream random things about me in public, embarrasin sh!t or what? I only now came to my room to find cling film wrapped around my toilet lid? This has happened more than once, and frankly im gettin p!ssed off..

I mean, im a big guy, people dont generally tend to take me lightly.. But because i live with them they feel its cool to do what they want and im not gonna cause a beef?
 
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