"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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How to deal with a girl trying to pick fights

shinko

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 12, 2007
Messages
83
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To cut to the chase, there's this girl who i've been chatting up the past few weeks. We're on the same course etc at uni and we've had our diso due, so i havent gone out with her yet because of the deadlines. i told her straight up i was gona ask her out after though,since everything was kinda leading that way and i wanted to make my intentions obvious. she's apparently never had a serious relationship before so she's abit shy and inexperienced and was abit taken aback by my forward proposal. she said yes nonetheless, so skip skipping forward a few weeks to today we're chatting.

She dropped in near the beginning about some other dude trying to chat her up etc, which i countered with indifference and made fun of her about him. All good so far but then as the convo progressed, she started trying to pick holes in everything i said and find fault with it. I called her on it and she said "sorry... I feel like being irritating today" and "ok.. im sorry.. Im bored.." I cut the talk there and then because it was getting stupid. she gets back to me later though and to cut a long story short did it all over again and ended up calling me sexist and some other stuff way way off the mark. Which is when i lost it and told her to take a hike.

i know i made the mistake of talking to her a second time, i should just ignored her for a while, but what i would appreciate is some advice on dealing with girls when they try to a pick a fight, or get a raise out of me. Staying calm is one thing, but actually dealing with it so it doesnt happen again is another.I wanna be able to set her straight, without making it obvious she got under my skin
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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tick37

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 18, 2008
Messages
477
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She's insecure, and if she can get under your skin it makes her feel better. She's got the bully attitude toward you. It brings her up and brings you down. Don't let any of it phase you. Don't let her opinions be yours. Have your own mind and don't bend to hers. She'll test you, too.

I dated a girl who was the polar opposite of me and my beliefs. It wasn't a problem for her because she like me and didn't see any need to argue over trivial things. She liked me enough not to argue. What was attractive to her though was that I had standards and firm beliefs. Girls like guys who stand for something.

Another option is to get rid of her. Stop talking to her because it may never change. Some people click and some people clash.
 
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