Hi please I do need some help and advice on how to talk to a girl that I like.I often get nervous when I am with her but can then talk other girls. Besides I really don't even know what to talk about. I don't wanna lose this girl cuz she stares liking me first.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
How to converse with a girl you like
- Thread starter sunkist
- Start date
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Toph
Don Juan
This happens to all of us. Everyone is nervous about doing everything perfectly but once you start getting that into someone you really need to chill out.
I can tell you right from experience that if you feel like you are walking on eggshells your sexual relationship is basically over.
Develop your personality and your self-esteem. These two combined are solid to boost your conversational skills. You should also know what to say to anyone because you should be honest with yourself.
Just don't be like everyone else, which is a lot easier than it sounds. All you have to do is be yourself, but turn into a serious but playful, goal oriented, interesting self and you can meet even better women.
I can tell you right from experience that if you feel like you are walking on eggshells your sexual relationship is basically over.
Develop your personality and your self-esteem. These two combined are solid to boost your conversational skills. You should also know what to say to anyone because you should be honest with yourself.
Just don't be like everyone else, which is a lot easier than it sounds. All you have to do is be yourself, but turn into a serious but playful, goal oriented, interesting self and you can meet even better women.
Thanks man but the thing is I never have problems talking to all my other numerous girl friends except for her. Do I always need to have in mind what to say to het or I should just try and be myself and say whatever comes to my mind.
Toph
Don Juan
Honestly I recommend saying what ever comes to your mind but don't be socially awkward. Here let me break down some good tips for conversation.
Before I do that I just want to elaborate on what you have. You have a condition called Oneitis and it can be devastating because a girl will loose attraction for you so quickly that you can easily be thrown into a depression. Here's the deal.
Women want to feel many different emotions through your conversation with them. If you are boring, that is the worst possible position to be in. So how can you not be boring?
Tell Stories WITH CONFIDENCE. The confidence part is key, if you tell a bad story with a nervous tone then the girl will be creeped out by you immediately.
Crack jokes and tease her. This just shows that you are there to have fun. Like sometimes I'll just crack jokes because I think they are funny. I am not insulting anyone or doing anything.
Girl: Do you ski?
Me: No I snowboard, actually I face board down the mountain.
I told her this comment for several reasons.
1) I am a fun loving person, I am trying to have fun. Last time I went snowboarding I fell about 6 times on my face. I can make fun of myself and it shows that I am confident and don't hesitate and ALSO sets me apart from many other guys who talk about boring topics all of the time.
Some girls love having deep conversations but the key is to stay on one subject.
I love talking about dreams with my girlfriend and really getting to know her for several reasons. Higher quality girls want higher quality conversation. I also need a higher connection for myself, that is what I am looking for.
Don't get caught up on this girl, I'm telling you right now tone your feelings down or you will get hurt. Don't walk on eggshells because that is not what men do, and it is not what women want men to do.
How about you just communicate these qualities.
1) Enthusiasm about life.
2) Good sense of humor.
3) Interesting perception of life and character.
That is a big start.
Before I do that I just want to elaborate on what you have. You have a condition called Oneitis and it can be devastating because a girl will loose attraction for you so quickly that you can easily be thrown into a depression. Here's the deal.
Women want to feel many different emotions through your conversation with them. If you are boring, that is the worst possible position to be in. So how can you not be boring?
Tell Stories WITH CONFIDENCE. The confidence part is key, if you tell a bad story with a nervous tone then the girl will be creeped out by you immediately.
Crack jokes and tease her. This just shows that you are there to have fun. Like sometimes I'll just crack jokes because I think they are funny. I am not insulting anyone or doing anything.
Girl: Do you ski?
Me: No I snowboard, actually I face board down the mountain.
I told her this comment for several reasons.
1) I am a fun loving person, I am trying to have fun. Last time I went snowboarding I fell about 6 times on my face. I can make fun of myself and it shows that I am confident and don't hesitate and ALSO sets me apart from many other guys who talk about boring topics all of the time.
Some girls love having deep conversations but the key is to stay on one subject.
I love talking about dreams with my girlfriend and really getting to know her for several reasons. Higher quality girls want higher quality conversation. I also need a higher connection for myself, that is what I am looking for.
Don't get caught up on this girl, I'm telling you right now tone your feelings down or you will get hurt. Don't walk on eggshells because that is not what men do, and it is not what women want men to do.
How about you just communicate these qualities.
1) Enthusiasm about life.
2) Good sense of humor.
3) Interesting perception of life and character.
That is a big start.
Trendsetter
Don Juan
- Joined
- Sep 5, 2007
- Messages
- 87
- Reaction score
- 0
Be interesting.sunkist said:Thanks man but the thing is I never have problems talking to all my other numerous girl friends except for her. Do I always need to have in mind what to say to het or I should just try and be myself and say whatever comes to my mind.
Sounds like $hitty advice but if you're interesting, you'll never have a problem worrying about what to say, then it's just how you say it. Think of comedians for example, they don't tell jokes, they talk about their everyday lives but say it in a fun and entertaining way.
Have something you're passionate about and talk about that, ask about her. ASK HER OPEN ENDED QUESTIONS. People LOVE talking about themselves, talk about gender politics (why it's so hard form men to be monogamous, make a biology reference about the woman having to nurse for 9 months while the male can spread his seed to as many women as possible, how it's biology that causes men to be unfaithful and it's not our fault....always gets a good laugh, but its true). I'm very interested in female psychology so that interests me, I love teasing, teasing is fun and builds sexual tension, don't take yourself too serious, talk about style. What do you look for in a woman, talk about that, eg "I love a girl that has lots of style.....i get along with really adventurous women, my ex was adventurous bla bla bla they keep me on my toes and are fun to be with, I can tell you're adventurous, you seem reserved but I know it's just a front" that's a truism, psychics use that all the time to fortune tell.
anyway, be interesting. Develop you're personality and practice, practice, practice....but don't be a weird. Good luck
“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.