"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

How to become more social? (My college orientation experience)

Locster

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 28, 2006
Messages
91
Reaction score
0
Location
Los Angeles
So earlier this week i attended college orientation and it was cool but the main problem i had was meeting new people. Even though mostly everybody was social and willing to meet new people I had trouble socializing with them. Something inside just keeps from acting like a normal social person would. Even when people would approach me i would act cold even though I a cool guy, im just shy when it comes to people i dont know. I basically didnt socialize in the whole 2 days i was there. I need to find a way to lay back and not really care about other people's perception of me. What are things i can do to change this problem?
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

Read more...

Ice Cold

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 27, 2002
Messages
2,313
Reaction score
2
Location
Moscow
Don't expect to develop anything immediately. Just ask some questions about them. Tell them that you like something about them... Tell about yourself.

Orientation is supposed to be a blur. Later when you actually go to classes you'll see the people and say: "Hey, I saw you at the orientation!"
 

sparky0000

Banned
Joined
Apr 27, 2006
Messages
669
Reaction score
4
College sucks. It did for me at least.

Orientation was not so hot. I was pretty much urinating every 3 minutes (I get that way when I am nervous). I knew zero people. It seemed that everyone knew at least a few people. Not me. A few people came up to me and I stuttered and stammered until they gave up and left me. I spent most of the time (when not urinating) talking on the phone to my Mother. Yes, my Mother. There were a few "studs" who were talking to girls. I think most of them are married now and hating life...lol.

If you want to know how my college years went just ask. I doubt yours will be as ugly as mine were.

BTW, don't chase after the girls. Study Russian instead. ;) You will not be sorry. I promise you.
 

Ace of Flames

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 11, 2006
Messages
1,500
Reaction score
16
Location
Everywhere you want to be.... I'm like a Visa card
sparky0000 said:
College sucks. It did for me at least.

Orientation was not so hot. I was pretty much urinating every 3 minutes (I get that way when I am nervous). I knew zero people. It seemed that everyone knew at least a few people. Not me. A few people came up to me and I stuttered and stammered until they gave up and left me. I spent most of the time (when not urinating) talking on the phone to my Mother. Yes, my Mother. There were a few "studs" who were talking to girls. I think most of them are married now and hating life...lol.

If you want to know how my college years went just ask. I doubt yours will be as ugly as mine were.

BTW, don't chase after the girls. Study Russian instead. ;) You will not be sorry. I promise you.
Um.... no. Just no.

Nothing in that post was helpful. You just sound like you're complaining. How does that help him? You didn't have a single word of encouragement or advice, and.... study Russian? What does that do for you? Unless you plan to live in an area with people that speak Russian, which I imagine very few people in LA do... then its a waste of money and time that could better be spent on other classes in college.

Now, on topic: No worries bro. I just had my orientation as well, and I had a few of the same experiences. It seemed that lots of people knew at least 1 other person, while I didn't. But I didn't let that stop me. I just talked to the people that sat next to me, and I even went farther and did a # close on the first day! I agree with the notion that orientation is just a flood of info and people and everything coming at you. But I also think that once school gets started and we've been around it all for a while, everything will calm down and get easier. If you live on campus, you'll most likely get a roommate, and that's your first friend. If he knows some people already, get introduced. Then you'll have a small network, and you can build on that if/when you want.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

FightinTiger

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 16, 2006
Messages
23
Reaction score
0
you'd be surprised. most of them have never met before.

I went up to this group of people that were laughing and carrying on like they had known each other since kindergarden. it turns out they had all met that night and just sort of stuck together. so, I joined in with them.

so, don't feel out of place. just find some people. chances are, they just recently met each other, as well, and are very open to newcomers.
 

Locster

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 28, 2006
Messages
91
Reaction score
0
Location
Los Angeles
what are steps i can take to help my problem of talking to strangers?

i am a social guy when i know people i just have trouble starting conversations with strangers
 

Ace of Flames

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 11, 2006
Messages
1,500
Reaction score
16
Location
Everywhere you want to be.... I'm like a Visa card
Just ask a question. Ask for directions to a place, even if you know how to get there. Ask for opinions on local hangouts. Ask what time it is.

Anything to start the convo, and then you can take it where you want.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

Read more...

Top