"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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how to be suave in the military

princesimba

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so i just enlisted into the army. no i didnt sign up for it, i come from a country with conscription... ZZZ

anyway, i found it extremely difficult to be myself in the army. everything is just so different.

There are no females in my bunk or even in my camp, so there's no one to attract. But i find it extremely difficult to be the "alpha male" here. I find it difficult to even be myself. I just realized there's actually so much in me thats actually not awesome. I actually dont even know how to do simple housework such as cleaning, washing my clothes or even fixing simple electronics. everyone around me is in the same uniform with the same haircut. My self-esteem went way down during the past few months of enlisting. Its beginning to affect my civilian life as well.

And theres no faking anything in the army. every man must stand up for himself. every man is clear what they and their comrades around can or cannot do.

I would appreciate tips on how to boost selfconfidence and be more "alpha" in the military world. Thanks. I will be returning to being a civilian in about a year's time or so and i need to be prepared
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Samwild

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princesimba said:
so i just enlisted into the army. no i didnt sign up for it, i come from a country with conscription... ZZZ

anyway, i found it extremely difficult to be myself in the army. everything is just so different.

There are no females in my bunk or even in my camp, so there's no one to attract. But i find it extremely difficult to be the "alpha male" here. I find it difficult to even be myself. I just realized there's actually so much in me thats actually not awesome. I actually dont even know how to do simple housework such as cleaning, washing my clothes or even fixing simple electronics. everyone around me is in the same uniform with the same haircut. My self-esteem went way down during the past few months of enlisting. Its beginning to affect my civilian life as well.

And theres no faking anything in the army. every man must stand up for himself. every man is clear what they and their comrades around can or cannot do.

I would appreciate tips on how to boost selfconfidence and be more "alpha" in the military world. Thanks. I will be returning to being a civilian in about a year's time or so and i need to be prepared
First rule of this exercise is to drop the idea of "Alpha" as such labels, I have found, are more detremental than beneficial.
Second is to identify the problem, which you have e. g. lack of knowledge. Third is to rectify said problem. Look at your service in this light, you are in a perfect test bed to improve oneself without a lot of soul crushing negativity (from women, the type that matters the most to us). Since your low on the confidence your also low on ego, which helps a lot in what I am about to propose to you; your mileage may vary :box: .
Those around you that know how to do things, both mundane as house cleaning to extraordinary such as playing guitar all learned how to do this at some point in their lives and were in the same exact situation as you are now. One day at a time, ask for input on how to better complete a task. For example, I saw one of the guys in my squadron knew how to play guitar, so for a 24 pack of Coors he taught me some cords on the guitar and I made a new friend for a few hours. Granite, I still can't "play" guitar all that well, but I hum and stroke some cords and it goes over well with the ladies enough to demostrate high value (DMV). I have also used this guitar DMV to learn how to install a exhaust in a car, wax a floor, shine shoes, install cabinets and many other things. Following and incorperating this piece of advice in your own unique way will allow you to build your on valued self worth (aka confidence/esteem) which will allow you to seek more challenges to see what your made of.
Remember, boys are born into this world and many stay that way. Men on the other hand are made when they let go of their mother's coattails and experience the trials and errors of the world to positively change the world in their own small way.
I like to think such environments as the army are an accelerated path to experiencing and completing these task with enough effort.
If your in need of tangeble guidance seek out "The Book of Pook" and the latest "DJ Bible" both found on this site or by google search. Yes, the context applies to the courting of women, but have you ever had a superior stare you down to where it felt like they were burning holes through your body? That my friend is eye contact and displays confidence (even during a verbal ass chewing). At the very heart of all this DJ/PUA/Seduction community is self help and psychological rewiring to display the us that resides in our heads and is improperly displayed to everyone else. Harness this knowledge, use my words as guidance if you wish, and live long and prosper :box: .
 

Konada

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Just suck it up and go through with it. You'll emerge as a better and more confident man. Mantain a mindset of self improvement - because being in the military is about pushing your limits. Believe me, I thought army was a waste of time but after few months into service I'm finding myself getting more motivates and discipline in handling my business. Take it from someone who is currently in the conscript military as well.
 

BMX

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Why don't you focus on becoming a soldier first and then becoming better at what you do? You are still in the elementary stages of training. I hope you will come to enjoy the lifestyle and continue on active-duty for more than a year. I'm in for 5 years.
 

princesimba

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thank you all for your posts! Its good to know there are military personnel in this community too!

I humbly accept all the above advice you guys have given me. Im currently only 3 months into the military, but i'll take the next few months time to learn and hopefully be able to come back to say that i have become a better man. Thank you all again!

PS I just realized the title of the thread is somewhat misleading LOL
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Samwild

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Yeah should be "How best to build/test DJ skills while serving in the military" :crackup:

Live long and prosper. :box:
 

Alle_Gory

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princesimba said:
But i find it extremely difficult to be the "alpha male" here.
Your unit commander is the alpha male. Shut up and do what he says, within reason. He has a job to do, you have a job to do. Do it.


I actually dont even know how to do simple housework such as cleaning, washing my clothes or even fixing simple electronics. everyone around me is in the same uniform with the same haircut. My self-esteem went way down during the past few months of enlisting. Its beginning to affect my civilian life as well.
Learn. Do what you need to do to learn these skills.
 
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