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How To Be More Successful With Online Dating

ELMER_GANTRY

Don Juan
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Most guys take online dating way too seriously when they shouldn't. Online dating should only be used for acquiring extra women that co insides with you going out to meet new women. It kind of goes hand in hand. with dating. You use the online women for an extra source, in case of a flake or when you just want to get laid. Relying solely on online dating is not the way to go, because you will end up more frustrated than not. With the large amount of low quality looking women that frequent the sites, you will end up scratching your head most of the time. Don't spend too much time online and only use it as an extra alternative.

Some guys will go to great lengths to come up with the perfect profile. They will try to write an overly funny profile and will end up looking like a clown. Others will bore the sh*t out of women by writing their entire life story. The rest will show themselves as an AFC looking for the "perfect woman" as they drone on about being a nice guy. Avoid all that nonsense because most chicks don't give a sh*t anyway. Get to the point and have confidence in what you say about yourself. Do you think a chick cares if you just learned to play the guitar or that your brother is your best friend?

Pictures are the most important part of your profile. Women will judge you on looks and that will be the image they have of you even if they decide to meet up with you. Some guys will take the constipated looking selfies or the awkward lonely pose in which you appear as a loner. Some will pose with a Hooters Girl or some model chick from an event that's out of their league. The cropped pictures always seem to make an appearance as well. All of those types of pictures should be avoided at all cost.

Online dating gurus or amateurs giving online dating advice will always swear by telling you to use your best pictures. Well, I'm here to say that you shouldn't use your best pictures. What? Why do I say that? Because you don't want to appear to look better online than you actually do in person. If you look worse in person than you do in your pictures, then your date wont go over too well. Most importantly, you won't get laid by the chick you were trying to game.

People forget that you still have to meet up with the chick on the date if you want to get laid. Nothing is guaranteed over the internet until you show up as the same guy you were online. Women have that same online image of you imprinted in their minds. And if you show up not looking the same as they picture you as, they will be turned off.

Men will try to cover up their imperfections in the photos they choose. They might crop out their beer gut or conceal their thinning or balding head. Some will use older photos trying to appear younger or photo shop themselves into looking better than they are. Sometimes you might look better in a picture than you do in person. Using pictures that don't represent what you actually look like will do more harm than good.

What you want to do is look better in person than your pictures, so that your date is a guaranteed lay when the chick sees you as better than what she thought. The last thing you want is to be rejected, when you surprise the chick by showing up not looking like your online photos. You spent all your time getting the number, and the date, so make it successful by getting what you want, getting laid. Don't hide or conceal what you truly look like, because you won't be very successful. If you look like you actually do, then there shouldn't be a problem, unless the chick turns out to be not looking so hot.

The most important part of online dating is the actual date itself. You can't sit behind the computer and have real sex, the computer won't f*ck you, nor will a virtual chick come through the screen to bang you. All online interactions go out the window when you actually meet up. Then it becomes face to face where you have to use your actual game. Using other people's openers or copy and pasted material won't help you if you aren't the funny and witty guy she knows you as. This is where a lot of guys fail because they invest way too much into the online portion without thinking about the actual dating portion. This is why, the dating portion should be the most important part, because that is where you will actually get laid.

To be successful in online dating you should not take it too seriously, not spend too much time with it, write a decent about me, use pictures that represent yourself, don't invest too much with the online part, focus on the dating part of it, get laid by the numbers and not rejected for looking worse in person than your pictures.
 

Wraithe

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I know it's probably a little bit different for guys in more populated cities, but from what I've found online dating is only really good for conversation practice. All the girls, average looking girls at that, are using it to satisfy their attention whoring needs without any intentions of meeting up.

I'm a decent looking guy, in the field I get good responses even from beautiful girls (personality does wonders, and she can't see that on a dating site). Online, even though I've made profiles with 5+ pictures proving social status, etc. all I get are Skype buddies and a few back and forth messages. As soon as I suggest meeting or ask for the number she goes ghost.

The time investment just doesn't make it worth it when I could hit the streets and have multiple numbers tonight and potential dates soon after.. at best I have my online profile just for the off chance a girl finds me hot and comes on strong, ready and willing. Nope, hasn't happened yet.
 

ELMER_GANTRY

Don Juan
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Responses below in Red

Espi said:
I don't agree. In my experience, approaching women involves frustration and rejection, whether it's via face to face or online.

Women are women. They are the same whether they're showing off their t1ts at a nightclub or writing an extensive "girl-next-door" profile on match.com. When I approach women, I get rejected, and sometimes I feel frustrated, and occasionally I get laid. Has happened this way regardless of the venue in which I meet women.


I don't agree with you. I wasn't speaking about the subject of rejection per say, it was about women who are more prone to flaking online than face to face. The percentage of flaking online will always be higher than from face to face. That will lead to frustration after you went through all the trouble to get the number and to set up the date only to get flaked on. Balancing women in person and online will get you better results than just using online as your only source. Women on dating sites are not just using sites to meet men, they are meeting men in person too.

Speaking of frustration and rejection, average and below average looking man will get rejected far more often online than face to face, when women are only basing their impressions solely on the pictures alone. Men have no chance to interact with the women with any game they might have to seal the deal when she is only looking at his awkward selfies. Men can game women at nightclubs in person, online it's a different story only having pictures and an opener as your approach. Women will not be interested if they don't like the pictures. In person, a guy with tight game can make up for his lack of looks, he can't do that online. Rejection and frustration will be higher online than in person for a lot of men.



In my opinion, most of the women you're meeting face to face likely have or have had or are thinking about subscribing to an online dating site, so you might want to prepare yourself to do a lot of head scratching.


Women thinking about subscribing to an online dating site is not the same as actually being subscribed to a site. The women are not active on the site if they are only thinking about it or have had one in the past. Those same women will take dating more seriously face to face than online and that will lead to less head scratching. People can think about anything, that doesn't mean it will happen. Some men think they can bang 9's but can only pull 4's.

There will be far more better looking women to choose from at a nightclub than on a dating site. A girl who is a knockout won't be on a dating site looking for men to date when she is already dating men offline. Social networking is a better avenue for online dating where you have access to tons of beautiful women. On dating sites, you can only choose from the women who sign up. Almost every woman has a Facebook or Twitter account than an actual dating profile.



Obviously if your photo is outdated and you're bald and 20 lbs. fatter and 2 inches shorter, than yes. Misrepresenting their physical appearance is the #1 complaint that I hear about men from the women that I meet via online. I personally suggest displaying a half dozen photos that are RECENT (that's the most important factor, in my mind); that show you SMILING (a good smile; nothing creepy). If you're not smiling, your countenance needs to look attractive. No scowling or angry face, etc. A shirtless photo or two is fine, as long as you're in shape and you appear to be engaged in something, other than smiling in front of the mirror. Keep in mind I've seen exceptions to the rules, but exceptions don't change the rules much.

The complaints you heard confirm what I just said. People are too concerned about what they look like online instead of looking better in person when it actually counts. Getting laid over a computer won't work out too well. Getting laid in person is how it happens when you look better than the pictures you posted.

Men and women will use old photos or enhance their pictures to look better, to hide or cover up their imperfections. They forget that their imperfections will still show up on the date when it counts. Some people still are using pictures from myspace in the 2005-06 era. Some people just don't take good pictures, and both are a reason why the date doesn't turn out well and for rejection and frustration early on.



In my mind there's no such thing as a guaranteed lay. Unless you're dating a prostitute.

Women will base their first impression on your pictures and your online interaction. Some women will agree to have sex with you even before the date. If you show up looking the same or better than your pictures, being the same guy online as she knows you as, it's pretty much a guaranteed lay. When you show up looking worse than your pictures and have nothing to say because you used scripted openers, then the lay won't happen and will be the reason for the frustration.


The same exact advice can be applied anywhere when approaching women. Getting laid "in numbers" will usually require APPROACHES "in numbers." If I want to get laid a lot, I approach a lot. Again, there are exceptions to the rules, but exceptions hardly ever change the rules.

I disagree. Some men spend too much time online with nothing to show for it taking it too seriously, and they delete their profiles leaving frustrated. When men are misrepresenting themselves, the online approaches won't amount to anything. A lot of women don't take online dating seriously when they are meeting men already in person and just using the sites for fun. The reason that I suggested not to spend too much time online and do more approaching in person.
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