How to Be a Ladies Man

[bigneil]

After carefully studying the many definitions of the term "Ladies Man", a composite list of the desired characteristics was compiled.

Ladies Man
- noun

"A man who is...

• Usually flirtatious toward
• Highly attentive to
• Fond of
• Successful with
• Attractive toward
• One who strives to please and obtain the admiration of
• One who relishes the company of
• One who has sexual affairs out of wedlock with

....many women. "

The more of these one meets, the more of a ladies man they are.

Litmus test: (according to Urban Dictionary): A man who has bedded two women in one week

Synonyms: A Don Juan. (SS Readers are well on their way!)

If this misses anything, please add your bullet points here.

 

[Yewki]

Do you get a bumper sticker if you meet all the criteria or something?

 

[wifehunter]

Da ladies man be smooth too...

You dig?

 

[zekko]

Litmus test: (according to Urban Dictionary): A man who has bedded two women in one week.

I don't think that's much of a litmus test, really, because any blind squirrel can find a nut (or two). Most guys who happen to be in the right place at the right times could bed two women in a week.

I like the overall definition, however, because it shows that a Don Juan does his part to play the role of a Don Juan. All that business about being flirtatious, attentive, and relishing the company of many women. Etc, etc. As opposed to this forum, where guys tend to take a more hard line aloof attitude toward women and just expect them to be drawn to that.

This is one reason why I don't describe myself as a DJ, because I really don't care that much, I can take them or leave them. It's part of my fatal (?) flaw with women - I really don't care enough to "game" them. Nevertheless, there's usually at least one around who appreciates what I have to offer.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

I don't think that's much of a litmus test, really, because any blind squirrel can find a nut (or two). Most guys who happen to be in the right place at the right times could bed two women in a week.

I like the overall definition, however, because it shows that a Don Juan does his part to play the role of a Don Juan. All that business about being flirtatious, attentive, and relishing the company of many women. Etc, etc. As opposed to this forum, where guys tend to take a more hard line aloof attitude toward women and just expect them to be drawn to that.

This is one reason why I don't describe myself as a DJ, because I really don't care that much, I can take them or leave them. It's part of my fatal (?) flaw with women - I really don't care enough to "game" them. Nevertheless, there's usually at least one around who appreciates what I have to offer.

$hit just a cheating husband or bf can bed two in one week. With a ladies man though, the ladies don't care that he's with more than one.

 

[zekko]

$hit just a cheating husband or bf can bed two in one week. With a ladies man though, the ladies don't care that he's with more than one.

I tend to agree with that, although I don't think it's necessarily a compliment. If a woman doesn't care if you are with other women, she sees you as a short term mating prospect only. Around here, that's seen as ideal, but it also means she doesn't care about you for the long term.

Now some women will desire their short term men for something more, but that is not a good recipe for happiness, for anyone involved.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

I tend to agree with that, although I don't think it's necessarily a compliment. If a woman doesn't care if you are with other women, she sees you as a short term mating prospect only. Around here, that's seen as ideal, but it also means she doesn't care about you for the long term.

Now some women will desire their short term men for something more, but that is not a good recipe for happiness, for anyone involved.

When they get with one of these celebrities it's the same thing. A ladies man is like a local celebrity. They know they can't have him, but they are happy to have a piece.

 

[zekko]

When they get with one of these celebrities it's the same thing. A ladies man is like a local celebrity. They know they can't have him, but they are happy to have a piece.

That's an interesting way to look at it. I think in the case of celebrities at least, they WOULD actually like to have him for the long term, they just may be willing to settle for less because that's realistically all they can get. And I agree that's often the case with the ladies man, although they may also just want a roll in the hay.

One of the advantages of the ladies man is that they don't get attached, so they are ideal sex partners for women who want to cheat. Because the guy isn't going to keep sniffing around, she has a better chance of getting away with the one night stand without the guy blowing it for her.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

That's an interesting way to look at it. I think in the case of celebrities at least, they WOULD actually like to have him for the long term, they just may be willing to settle for less because that's realistically all they can get. And I agree that's often the case with the ladies man, although they may also just want a roll in the hay.

One of the advantages of the ladies man is that they don't get attached, so they are ideal sex partners for women who want to cheat. Because the guy isn't going to keep sniffing around, she has a better chance of getting away with the one night stand without the guy blowing it for her.

They can't get celebrities either and they know that. That's reality, these babes just hit to score their counter for hitting that particular celebrity. So thinking of this makes me feel that a DJ must have a social circle or at least a reputation in his area for a master seducer. They want to try it, and they know they won't get him.

 

[zekko]

They can't get celebrities either and they know that. That's reality, these babes just hit to score their counter for hitting that particular celebrity. So thinking of this makes me feel that a DJ must have a social circle or at least a reputation in his area for a master seducer. They want to try it, and they know they won't get him.

Those guys certainly exist, but I think it's best not to put everybody into the same pigeonhole. There are certainly many men who could be dropped out into a completely strange town and be very successful seducing local ladies. A reputation may help (or even hinder, sometimes), but isn't strictly necessary. Some guys are just handsome, charming, appealing, or plain good at it.

 

[bigneil]

Did you ever realize how a celebrity really can't be a DJ, because (like someone with a lot of money) can never really discern between someone who likes their fame or their personality? The best you can be is the person an actor pretends to be.

 

[zekko]

Did you ever realize how a celebrity really can't be a DJ, because (like someone with a lot of money) can never really discern between someone who likes their fame or their personality?

I don't know, I kind of think that if a guy can get laid a lot, he's a guy who can get laid a lot, it doesn't really matter what the reason is. I mean I know nobody likes gold diggers, but I've never quite understood why it was okay for a girl to like your for you looks but not your fame or success.

For the most part, your looks are a gift which you were given, but if a guy worked hard for his wealth and/or fame, he earned that. He put the effort in, why should he be dissatisfied if he profits from it with a little extra attention from the ladies? But it's okay if they like him for his looks, which he had nothing whatsoever to do with (gym rats aside)?

Obviously if you are in a LTR, you don't want her to JUST be drawn to the fame or money or whatever, but if it's a short term sex situation, what difference does it make?

 

[bigneil]

I don't know, I kind of think that if a guy can get laid a lot, he's a guy who can get laid a lot, it doesn't really matter what the reason is. I mean I know nobody likes gold diggers, but I've never quite understood why it was okay for a girl to like your for you looks but not your fame or success.

For the most part, your looks are a gift which you were given, but if a guy worked hard for his wealth and/or fame, he earned that. He put the effort in, why should he be dissatisfied if he profits from it with a little extra attention from the ladies? But it's okay if they like him for his looks, which he had nothing whatsoever to do with (gym rats aside)?

Obviously if you are in a LTR, you don't want her to JUST be drawn to the fame or money or whatever, but if it's a short term sex situation, what difference does it make?

This is exactly right. Indeed, it is poor 19 year old men jerking off in their mommy's basement that say "She only likes him for his money!!"

Imagine a woman is dating two men. One because he is her age and they went to the same high school and he happened to hang around her long enough to get lucky, but he has no job. The other is 15 years older and a successful business man who is not as pretty but equally attractive. Who has the upper hand? When push comes to shove, it is the man with the money who has the upper hand, not the pretty boy.

That's why the only measure is whether she is with you or not.

 

[bigneil]

Ooooooooh, ittthhhh a ladyyyyy.....

Alpha males do not declare themselves Alpha. That's for other people to do.

 

[bigneil]

You give off this 'I'm better than everyone else' vibe that really irritates me.

Apparently. But in some cases it's not a vibe, it's simply reality.

You'll be on my Ignore List in 2 seconds.

Ok, self-declared Alpha (also known as Gamma) wow, you really are a woman. What man would ever threaten to remove himself from another man's life? You mean you'll unsubscribe? Please do, girly.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Did you ever realize how a celebrity really can't be a DJ, because (like someone with a lot of money) can never really discern between someone who likes their fame or their personality? The best you can be is the person an actor pretends to be.

I feel you, a DJ has to have so much more charisma and inner self. I was just trying to give an analogy to how he might strike the environment, and why the babes won't care that he's with others.

 

[Ronaldo7]

Apparently. But in some cases it's not a vibe, it's simply reality.

+1 for that, Neil.

Ok, self-declared Alpha (also known as Gamma) wow, you really are a woman. What man would ever threaten to remove himself from another man's life? You mean you'll unsubscribe? Please do, girly.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

This is exactly right. Indeed, it is poor 19 year old men jerking off in their mommy's basement that say "She only likes him for his money!!"

Imagine a woman is dating two men. One because he is her age and they went to the same high school and he happened to hang around her long enough to get lucky, but he has no job. The other is 15 years older and a successful business man who is not as pretty but equally attractive. Who has the upper hand? When push comes to shove, it is the man with the money who has the upper hand, not the pretty boy.

That's why the only measure is whether she is with you or not.

If the same age kid has the same or better access to her he has the upper hand because he is getting more with less. Men should date women as equally motivated as them with their own money.

 

[bigneil]

A big part of being a ladies man is to genuinely enjoy time with ladies, in real time. This as opposed to thinking "If she doesn't end up having sex with me, then I failed". Each interaction has to be a balanced thing. When the relationship ends, neither party owes the other anything. Thus, a man should never become over invested, meaning the amount you spend on a date must be balanced with the amount you enjoy yourself on that date. This is about your own budget mainly, but I like to convert to the time it takes to earn that money (or what you had to sell to afford it, which can really put things in perspective when you're between jobs).

Remember: a woman will never give you "credit". That is, she's never going to say "Well, last week we went to Del Frisco for appetizers and a half bottle of Dominus, so this time I'll be happy with McDonald's". Women don't think that way. That is based on honor and integrity which are masculine traits. Give a man $20 and he'll come mow your lawn the next day like he said (unless he's a scum bag). With a woman, even your own cousin will call and say "Little Jimmy has the sniffles and we're on out way to Boston Medical so I'll text you when we're done and I'll still try to stop by".